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Concerning How It Used To Be.......
| Open Poetry #19 |
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Concerning How It Used To Be....... |
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SEA 
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 2000-01-18
Posts 22676with you 
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 concerning how it used to be, the story of you and me hearts steeped in love so contentedly the endless needing wanting touch ache consuming beyond too much holding on past dawning day bodies meld together in gentle sway intimate whispers, of our yesterday echo gently through reminiscing how we were, my heart is missing ~SEA~ [This message has been edited by SEA (03-14-2002 12:13 PM).] |
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| © Copyright 2002 S.E. A - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Christopher
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-08-02
Posts 8296Purgatorial Incarceration |
this was cool lady... have you ever considered trying it without the rhyme? (to be honest, i have something against rhyming lately... seems to truncate too much of the meaning - this is the first "rhyming" pome i've replied to in a while...) Peace C |
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SEA
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 2000-01-18
Posts 22676with you |
Christopher, you are a sweetie  thank you, and you made me learn a new word  lolI do the free verse every so often....I will try to do one for you soon |
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Auguste
since 2000-02-16
Posts 3953By the sea |
Susan, Not only did I enjoy the rhyme, but also the lovely watercolor. This poem conveys the truth of so many relationships. I believe I'll keep it.  (((hugs)))Michael Stars will shine when I am gone |
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Duncan Member Ascendant
since 2001-08-07
Posts 5455 |
concerning how it used to be, the story of you and me hearts steeped in love so contentedly What a difference a day makes, huh? Cowboy |
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vandana
since 1999-10-22
Posts 10463USA |
enjoyed |
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Aimster Member Elite
since 2000-02-19
Posts 4297Charlotte, NC |
susan- this was so lovely my sweet friend...your heart shines so beautifully in this and the longing and aching is so heart felt. you brought me back to some of my own feelings, or perhaps i never left them. take care of yourself. amy "Just because someone doesn't love you the way you want them to, doesn't |
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Nightshade
since 2001-08-31
Posts 13962just out of reach |
Wonderful Sea! Chris Life is not measured by breaths you take, but by moments that take your breath away. |
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Mistletoe Angel
since 2000-12-17
Posts 32816Portland, Oregon |
 (smiles) Awwwwwwwwww, this is soooooo beautiful, sweet friend, I love the watercolors too you use in your words, it describes the emotions of a relationship wonderfully! (kiss on cheek) May your heart forever sing with loves sweet memories, sweet friend, we all love you so much! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Susan, thank you for sharing! May love and light always shine upon you! Love, Noah Eaton |
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Enchantress Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113Canada eh. |
how we were, my heart is missing ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Oh Sue, this aches so bad! Very nicely penned and I enjoyed the rhyme. ~Hugs, Nancy~ ~Somewhere in my heart I'm always |
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Sven
since 1999-11-23
Posts 14937East Lansing, MI USA |
I like the rhyme here SEA, it gives it that "sway" and "dance" that I feel you're working with here. . . a dance of emotion. . . emotions gone, but still there. . . great job. . . every day, you get better and better. . . ------------------------------------------------------- To the world, you may only be one person. But to one person, you may be the world. |
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strbbux Member Elite
since 2001-12-19
Posts 3859 |
Sea Pleeeease do not give up the rhyme. I am such a lover of rhyme, I also love free verse, but I do not see any forced rhyme in this piece and it is lovely. I love it. floria Floria |
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angel girl Member
since 1999-07-23
Posts 322within a whisper... |
Aww I really like this one, Sea. You have a gift for words. "What makes letting go hard isn't losing what you had, but losing the dream of what could have been." |
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Mysteria
since 2001-03-07
Posts 18328British Columbia, Canada |
Very pretty Sea, and you are sure getting the hang of the "whole shebang" LOL, nicely done, picture and poem perfecto mongo! The pursuit of truth and beauty is a sphere of activity in which we are permitted to remain children all our lives. |
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amigo Senior Member
since 2001-10-12
Posts 520the earth school |
Oh...so much of warmth filled in these sad words....liked the painting too... |
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Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA |
SEA, your meaning will never be truncated in my book! |
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NapalmsConstantlyConfused
since 2001-05-15
Posts 529 |
sad, but moving.... a wonderful write from you SEA -Dave |
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walker Member Elite
since 2001-02-11
Posts 2240Florida |
Love it. |
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