Laugh of Lashes - pipTalk Forums

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Open Poetry #19

Laugh of Lashes

wayoutwalt
Member Elite

since 1999-06-22

Posts 4870
TEXAS (it's all big)

0 posted 2002-03-04 11:45 PM

You’re a laugh of lashes
A sudden splash
Of smashes
Running through grass
of dashes
Like a kiss
on the fifty yard line

I’m a frown
you turned down
cuz your smile
is so adept
and your lashes
are like passes
I’d gladly intercept

We have our
touch down dance
Not lacking in romance
As the end zone’s
The beginning
And both of us are winning
With your lashes
I advance

[This message has been edited by wayoutwalt (03-04-2002 11:47 PM).]

Kit McCallum

Administrator

Member Laureate

since 2000-04-30

Posts 14774
Ontario, Canada

1 posted 2002-03-05 06:50 AM

A clever and rhythmic read Walt ... very much enjoyed the pace and rhyme scheme throughout!

Best wishes,
/Kit

nakdthoughts
Member Laureate

since 2000-10-29

Posts 19200
Between the Lines

2 posted 2002-03-05 07:16 AM

Like it lots...hate football, but this
advancing "ain't" so bad *s

M

suthern

Member Seraphic

since 1999-07-29

Posts 20723
Louisiana

3 posted 2002-03-05 10:13 AM

I enjoyed this very much, wow... It's a clever write that leaves this reader smiling. *S*

Mistletoe Angel

Member Empyrean

since 2000-12-17

Posts 32816
Portland, Oregon

4 posted 2002-03-05 10:52 PM

(smiles) Awwwwwwww, this is soooooo beautifully creative, sweet friend, your gorgeous words of love always makes me smile just as I know your love will forever throw hail marys to dreams and joy forever! (big hugggsssssss) We all love you so much, sweet friend, this is one touchdown of a poem! YAY!!! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Walter, thank you for sharing!

May love and light always shine upon you!

Love,
Noah Eaton

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