navwin » Sanctuary » Poetic Haven » One Word (Duet with wayoutwalt)
Poetic Haven
Post A Reply Post New Topic One Word (Duet with wayoutwalt) Go to Previous / Newer Topic Back to Topic List Go to Next / Older Topic
LoveBug
Deputy Moderator 5 Tours
Moderator
Member Elite
since 2000-01-08
Posts 4697


0 posted 2001-05-20 12:28 PM


Walt, it was an honor! Thanks for putting up with the terza rima form!  


One moment, all it took for life to change
So easily, you took my breath away
And even now, to me, you never age.

One second, my life went from pause to play
So directly, you filled my life with you
And so I asked if you would come and stay

One word is all it took, then my soul flew
Above the pain that usually fills days
One look was all… to do that thing you do

One day I will capture your loving praise
Above that heartache worn-out from a cloud
Heaven is higher, in your perfect ways

One hearts’ prayer for soulmate to be found
You’re the answer, although you don’t realize
I quiver at each footstep and each sound

One last time I will look into your eyes
And one last time I will long to kiss you
For now, you and I are each other's guise




"Men judge generally more by the eye than by the hand, for everyone can see and few can feel."-Machiavelli

[This message has been edited by LoveBug (edited 05-20-2001).]

© Copyright 2001 Erica N. - All Rights Reserved
Alwye
Moderator
Member Elite
since 1999-06-16
Posts 3850
In the space between moments
1 posted 2001-05-20 12:48 PM


Absolutely gorgeous work you two!  You pair well together!  

*Krista Knutson*

"We can all become what we aspire to be
If Heaven's here on Earth..." ~Tracy Chapman

Dopey Dope
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Moderator
Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132
San Juan, Puerto Rico
2 posted 2001-05-20 12:09 PM


This was great! I really liked this. You two did wonderful.

I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust.

I'm in love with my shadow
I admire it daily

serenity blaze
Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738

3 posted 2001-05-20 03:14 PM


Nice!!!!! terza rima? I'm not familiar--that's it! I'm hanging out with the teens from now on! You guys are amazing--I learn more from you in two weeks and you are so much more fun! (Walt is a teen at heart, yanno!) Fantastic job, loved this, Lovebug. Now somebody point me in the direction of instruction of terza rima????
Poet deVine
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-26
Posts 22612
Hurricane Alley
4 posted 2001-05-20 03:53 PM


Wonderful!!! I really liked this. And the form is great!
LoveBug
Deputy Moderator 5 Tours
Moderator
Member Elite
since 2000-01-08
Posts 4697

5 posted 2001-05-21 06:27 PM


Serenity, terza rima isn't exactly modern.  

Dante used it in "The Divine Comedy". It's a very old Italian form. It consists of stanzas made up of three lines of iambic pentameter, where the rhyme schemes are woven: a-b-a, b-c-b, c-d-c, d-e-d, esc...

And here's my quote du jour: EASIER SAID THAN DONE!

"Men judge generally more by the eye than by the hand, for everyone can see and few can feel."-Machiavelli

Dark Angel
Member Patricius
since 1999-08-04
Posts 10095

6 posted 2001-05-21 07:47 PM


Oh Lordy me
This is really beautiful work.
WOW!
Excellent writing the both of you  

Maree

anonymous albert ?
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Elite
since 2001-03-23
Posts 2979

7 posted 2001-05-27 09:08 PM


the whole poem was pure beauty!!...you two did a great job on writing this...i really liked it

i'm addicted to passions in poetry!...are you?

Yu Lan
Senior Member
since 2000-04-13
Posts 1462
New Zealand
8 posted 2001-06-01 06:00 AM


Oh, well done you guys.. mm, this is lovely..

“One word can be magical. Imagine then, the effect of several words, together..”

brian madden
Member Elite
since 2000-05-06
Posts 4374
ireland
9 posted 2001-06-01 07:11 PM


what a wonderful team you guys make... enjoyed this .

"difference between love and comfortis that comfort's more reliable and true
Brutal and mocking but always therea crutch for enmity's saddest glare"

Ratleader
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Rara Avis
since 2003-01-23
Posts 7026
Visiting Earth on a Guest Pass
10 posted 2006-09-29 10:15 PM


I read this one earlier, and to be fully honest, I saved it to read again before responding. It's simply beautiful.

~~(¸¸¸¸ºº>   ~~(¸¸¸¸ºº>  ~~(¸¸ ¸¸ºº>    ~~~(¸¸ER¸¸ºº>
______________Ratleader______________

Post A Reply Post New Topic ⇧ top of page ⇧ Go to Previous / Newer Topic Back to Topic List Go to Next / Older Topic
All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format.
navwin » Sanctuary » Poetic Haven » One Word (Duet with wayoutwalt)

Passions in Poetry | pipTalk Home Page | Main Poetry Forums | 100 Best Poems

How to Join | Member's Area / Help | Private Library | Search | Contact Us | Login
Discussion | Tech Talk | Archives | Sanctuary