Poetic Haven |
I'm not alone in an empty room |
Riley
since 2002-07-18
Posts 1038in the pouring rain |
the nights are so cold here maybe its because my windows open i'm laying outside in the pouring rain i've been waiting for you for so long i can't remember the last time i took a breath without you forgetting the real things seems impossible but i want to i glance up your still not here but i can hear your voice whispering softly telling me don't leave when are you going to be look beyond whats normal you'll find me i believe in trust now that your kiss means something i can't understand but i'll tell you everything i know can you remember me or will i be lost forever in your memory no matter what i'll always love you |
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© Copyright 2004 Riley Grant - All Rights Reserved | |||
muted
since 2004-01-15
Posts 2949Elapsing, Eclipsing, Evolving |
Riley, this is absolutely beautiful in its longing, its need.....wonderful deeply expressed. |
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Riley
since 2002-07-18
Posts 1038in the pouring rain |
muted: i appreciate your comment and i am so glad you liked it that much. i am flattered... <3always riley no matter what i'll always love you |
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
Riley "i believe in trust now" Not an easy thing to do sometimes, but a sign of courage. |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
i can't remember the last time i took a breath ~*~ This fits so many situations. Riley, welcome home! |
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Riley
since 2002-07-18
Posts 1038in the pouring rain |
martie- trust is so hard....but it comes eventually...thank you for the reply sunshine-thanks...and its good to be back always riley no matter what i'll always love you |
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Local Parasite
since 2001-11-05
Posts 2527Transylconia, Winnipeg |
This poem seems to lack most of the elements that make me love your poetry---in particular, the strength of your imagination. Although, I get the feeling that this isn't one of those dressed-to-impress poems of yours, but something you wanted to write as a communication between your self and the apostrophic other. In that sense, though I'm not comfortable gauging quality, I'd wager you're been successful... Lovely seeing you around here again, Ri. Take care of yourself, sweetheart. Bri "God becomes as we are that we may be as he is." ~William Blake |
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Riley
since 2002-07-18
Posts 1038in the pouring rain |
LP: gosh its been a while since i've been here. and between now and last time i was here, a lot of things have happened...i went through a "depresseD" stage if you want to call it that....and now my life is getting back on track. but thank you for the reply...my poems will get better...hopefully....once again thanks for the reply... <3always, riley no matter what i'll always love you |
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Marshalzu
since 2001-02-15
Posts 2681Lurking |
There are some real moments of beauty in this poem but I was more than slightly distracted by the last two lines of the second stanza, which to me at least seemed to make no sense. Still I really enjoyed the read, thank you for sharing. Andrew |
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