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Poet deVine

Administrator

Member Seraphic

since 1999-05-26

Posts 22612
Hurricane Alley

0 posted 2001-05-08 08:23 PM

I stand alone amid the crowd
that gathers there to see
I hear the cries of anguish
the cries that come from me.

No one hears the sound I make
nor sees my bitter tears
for I am invisible and
have been this way for years.

If you could but live my life
you too would know my plight
I am a creature not of the day
nor even of the night.

I live amongst you never seen
where eyes slide away from mine
who chose to expatriate me
was this an idea of mine?

Or did you decide that I
was not worthy of your glance
did I ever seem real to you
did I ever have that chance?

I walk away with downcast eyes
my heart an empty shell
not knowing why you banished me
to my invisible hell.

Allan Riverwood

Member Elite

since 2001-01-04

Posts 3502
Winnipeg

1 posted 2001-05-08 08:48 PM

Being invisible is not a good feeling... this poem had such a sorrowful sense to it, but you really illustrated it well. I truly enjoyed reading this work of divinity.

~Allan

Build a man a fire, and he's warm for a day. Set a man on fire, and he'll be warm for the rest of his life.
~Unknown

Irish Rose
Member Patricius

since 2000-04-06

Posts 10263

2 posted 2001-05-08 09:43 PM

This is incredibly sad and I relate to much of it.

Kathleen Blake

"When red-haired girls scamper like roses over the rain-green grass,
and the sun drips honey."
Laurie Lee

Joyce Johnson

Member Rara Avis

since 2001-03-10

Posts 9912
Washington State

3 posted 2001-05-09 08:29 PM

But think of all the fun you can have, being invisible. Joyce

Dopey Dope

Moderator

Member Patricius

since 2000-08-30

Posts 11132
San Juan, Puerto Rico

4 posted 2001-05-13 02:40 PM

Well done! Wow the ending was to amazing. Invisible hell.....i loved that....very very very well done! I enjoyed the poem.

I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust.

I'm in love with my shadow
I admire it daily

LoveBug

Moderator

Member Elite

since 2000-01-08

Posts 4697

5 posted 2001-05-17 10:29 PM

Sharon, I know what it's like to feel invisible... you describe it so well, and I hope that this isn't a situation you find yourself in very often. Wonderful work, as usual.

"Men judge generally more by the eye than by the hand, for everyone can see and few can feel."-Machiavelli

anonymous albert ?

Member Elite

since 2001-03-23

Posts 2979

6 posted 2001-05-27 09:36 PM

this was over awesome...the ending was what hit me the hardest...i loved this piece!

i'm addicted to passions in poetry!...are you?

brian madden
Member Elite

since 2000-05-06

Posts 4374
ireland

7 posted 2001-05-30 06:35 PM

there are times when we feel like we are invisible and other times when we wish we were. When you feel ignored you just have to try and make yourself heard. Easier siad than done.

Words I can well relate to though, thanks for sharing

"you are what you own in this land, you can be king and it all depends on the view and what you can see" Whipping boy

Yu Lan
Senior Member

since 2000-04-13

Posts 1462
New Zealand

8 posted 2001-06-01 06:12 AM

well done Sharon..

I enjoyed reading it.
Hey, when it is like this, I usually find that there always is someone to notice you.. perhaps, u don't notice it.. but there is always someone..
Love
Lynne

catalinamoon

Member Rara Avis

since 2000-06-03

Posts 9543
The Shores of Alone

9 posted 2001-06-21 08:56 PM

Painful thoughts,Sharon. You well expressed the feeling. I have had it.
Sandra

Sven

Member Laureate

since 1999-11-23

Posts 14937
East Lansing, MI USA

10 posted 2001-06-23 06:11 PM

I've found that the only way to be visible is to make them see you. . .

great feelings here. . . I like it. . .

--------------------------------------------------------

To the world, you may only be one person. But to one person, you may be the world.

Honeybee
Member Ascendant

since 1999-12-26

Posts 5372
Ontario, CANADA

11 posted 2001-06-23 06:29 PM

Oh Sharon, if only I could express to you how much this touched me - how much I relate, the last verse is so striking and powerful!~

Take care,
Melissa~

Dark Angel
Member Patricius

since 1999-08-04

Posts 10095

12 posted 2001-07-10 07:48 PM

This is so sad Sharon, I felt the pain.
Great writing dear.

Maree

"little miss understood
little misunderstood"

~Marry me Jane~

JLR
Senior Member

since 2001-02-04

Posts 1785

13 posted 2001-07-10 09:32 PM

This made me think of the way people look, or don't look...into the eyes of those society deems 'undesirable'. Very effectively written!

Jamie
Member Elite

since 2000-06-26

Posts 3168
Blue Heaven

14 posted 2001-07-23 06:07 PM

Sometimes it is as simple as saying-- here I am, most often however you have to SCREAM!

A very well done and heartbreakingly sad poem.

There is society where none intrudes, by the deep sea, and music in its roar.
byron

chasing rain
Senior Member

since 2001-05-15

Posts 737
Canada

15 posted 2001-07-25 12:12 PM

Nicely done, and you portray invisibility well! Great work here!

-haeL

Va pensiero sull' ali dorate...

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