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Poetic Haven(PdV's challenge)
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Poetic Haven(PdV's challenge) |
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kaile
since 2000-02-06
Posts 5146singapore 
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I was a bonsai tree when I was young Conditioned to grow only in directions my parents faniced They burdened my roots with heavy chains They snipped away any branches that showed signs of fostering I used to fanasise about running away from home Taking refuge in a secret place I would call my own Where I would witness the sunrise in my treehouse and befriend the bear living inside the cave Where I would grow peas and beans and fuss about whether my hens were laying eggs Where I would finally be myself and explore life on my own terms We grow up. We mature. We turn cynical Our childhood fantasies are tucked into the drawers of our minds ashamed that we acknowledge them as invalid irrelevant silly nothings It was only when i stumbled upon writing (by accident!) that all these childhood follies exploded and sizzed and gushed out much like a dormant volcano finally having a say after years of suppression I was free to discover the me in me Writing offered a poetic haven perhaps but more importantly(sorry, im preaching) it became my sanity. [This message has been edited by faterider (edited 04-28-2001).] |
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| © Copyright 2001 heng kaile - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Elizabeth
Moderator
Member Ascendant
since 1999-06-07
Posts 6871Minnesota |
Such true words. Very well done Kaile!  |
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Marge Tindal
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384Florida's Foreverly Shores |
Kaile~ Very, very well done ! And are we ever glad you blossomed into a poet ! ~*Marge*~ ~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~ |
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
Yes...writing does put the charm back into many things...it is like seeing with loving eyes in a way. I very much enjoyed this poem. |
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Dopey Dope
Moderator
Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132San Juan, Puerto Rico |
I really enjoyed this! You did so well on the challenge!! Wow...very well done!  I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust. |
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Allan Riverwood
since 2001-01-04
Posts 3502Winnipeg |
Nice job. The parts that were in brackets really didn't do much for me though, they sort of ruined a bit of the feel of it. Just my humble opinion, of course. Still I liked the sentiments. ~Allan Build a man a fire, and he's warm for a day. Set a man on fire, and he'll be warm for the rest of his life. |
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kaile
since 2000-02-06
Posts 5146singapore |
thank you for all your comments and allan, i will think about what you said about the brackets  |
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Nicole Senior Member
since 1999-06-23
Posts 1835Florida |
Challenge well met! I really enjoyed your second stanza, the way you described the childhood fantasy. Took me back in time! I also especially liked your intro, very nice detail.  |
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kaile
since 2000-02-06
Posts 5146singapore |
Nicole, i enjoyed your offering too and for you to say that you enjoyed my piece makes me feel good....thanks |
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Munda Member Elite
since 1999-10-08
Posts 3544The Hague, The Netherlands |
I really loved this one Kaile! |
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kaile
since 2000-02-06
Posts 5146singapore |
thanx Munda! im glad you enjoyed  |
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