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Sandcastle |
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Local Parasite
since 2001-11-05
Posts 2527Transylconia, Winnipeg 
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Flew what, from the branches of willows in winter Whose green'ry did wilt and whose barkskin did splinter, And fell to the garment of Beauty, to tint her With hues of reality, shades of despair? Spun what, on the wheel of an innocent musing A starlit parade lit with children perusing A basket of questions, their words too confusing For eyes of a handful of summers to bear? It was to the basket, an infant did scuttle And sent it down Lethe, a personal shuttle To streams in a raindrop and lakes in a puddle Thro' mazes of playground equipment and swings If Nothing existed, it was his companion Who lifted his shoulder above the great Canyon And tost with him pebbles, all ingrates and rebels Assured be, these are but frivolous things. I know, for I saw him, when I came to wander He 'pon that high cliffside did mingle and ponder That garment of Beauty, and what lay beyond her And what was the taste of the milk from her breast? He, yes, he and Nothing, did watch as the feather And fish did so barter for roomier weather Until they decided where best they resided And into the chamber of Death lay to rest. My heart far grew dimmer, my pity did blossom With petals so awkward as wings of a possum Who knew not to fly--and my doubts ne'er could cross him A bird of firm majesty, truly was he So upward I clame on his imagination To meet those two partners, their soft jubilation And took them by hands to explore their creation The shoreline, where they built a castle with me. The boy (once an infant), a pail and a shovel Held forth and did plant me an odious hovel Where we could both kneel to fair Beauty and grovel And offer her prayers with our task-ridden hands. Beside him sat Nothing, who could but examine Creation--and he turned the eyes of the salmon Downstream, and their stomachs were stricken with famine-- Their bodies were gather'd and roll'd in the sand. We feasted, and Beauty seem'd wasted and fallow 'Til back flew the tide and grew ever so shallow We fasted, and o how our hearts we did hallow and Nothing did make his return to the ground. In the height despair and the depth of grim tragedy Somehow, our world could no longer imagined be A universe cried when the little boy died... And our castle decay'd all around. The ruins wept not for me--they were unwary Of Nothing, as he, like a venemous cherry, Laid waste to my spirit, as though some dark faerie Had crept to my lungs and extinguish'd my breath. When, sooner than hopefulness shun and abhor me The tide had disclosed its abundance before me-- The spectre of Beauty, who there did restore me And nourish me back from the chamber of Death. Flew what, from the branches of willows in winter Whose green'ry did wilt and whose barkskin did splinter, And fell to the garment of Beauty, to tint her With hues of reality, shades of despair? T'was I, with my lips to her nipple, there pressing Experience down through her faded night-dressing And the lips of a boy who is no more distressing-- Is sleeping, with Beauty to brush back his hair. [This message has been edited by Local Parasite (05-13-2003 08:14 PM).] |
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| © Copyright 2003 Brian James Lee - All Rights Reserved | |||
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JP Senior Member
since 1999-05-25
Posts 1343Loomis, CA |
My goodness, you are positively amazing! Yesterday is ash, tomorrow is smoke; only today does the fire burn. |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
 I WILL BE BACK!!!!  |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
Flew what, from the branches of willows in winter Whose green'ry did wilt and whose barkskin did splinter, And fell to the garment of Beauty, to tint her With hues of reality, shades of despair? Spun what, on the wheel of an innocent musing A starlit parade lit with children perusing A basket of questions, their words too confusing For eyes of a handful of summers to bear? It was to the basket, an infant did scuttle And sent it down Lethe, a personal shuttle To streams in a raindrop and lakes in a puddle Thro' mazes of playground equipment and swings If Nothing existed, it was his companion Who lifted his shoulder above the great Canyon And tost with him pebbles, all ingrates and rebels Assured be, these are but frivolous things. ======================================= My heart far grew dimmer, my pity did blossom With petals so awkward as wings of a possum Who knew not to fly--and my doubts ne'er could cross him A bird of firm majesty, truly was he So upward I clame on his imagination To meet those two partners, their soft jubilation And took them by hands to explore their creation The shoreline, where they built a castle with me. =================================== We feasted, and Beauty seem'd wasted and fallow 'Til back flew the tide and grew ever so shallow We fasted, and o how our hearts we did hallow and Nothing did make his return to the ground. In the height despair and the depth of grim tragedy Somehow, our world could no longer imagined be A universe cried when the little boy died... And our castle decay'd all around. The ruins wept not for me--they were unwary Of Nothing, as he, like a venemous cherry, Laid waste to my spirit, as though some dark faerie Had crept to my lungs and extinguish'd my breath. When, sooner than hopefulness shun and abhor me The tide had disclosed its abundance before me-- The spectre of Beauty, who there did restore me And nourish me back from the chamber of Death. Flew what, from the branches of willows in winter Whose green'ry did wilt and whose barkskin did splinter, And fell to the garment of Beauty, to tint her With hues of reality, shades of despair? T'was I, with my lips to her nipple, there pressing Experience down through her faded night-dressing And the lips of a boy who is no more distressing-- Is sleeping, with Beauty to brush back his hair. ================================== *shaking my head* OK....ya know....I'm starting to sound like Paula Abdula on American Idol...LOL-- Cause each time I reply to you, I feel like Im saying the same things over and over, but how can I NOT mention your mastery of rhyme and meter...how can I not be vocal about your vocabulary...how can I not linger in your language *haha* How can I not be impressed with your imagery. How can I not articulate my awe of your ability and grasp of poetic phrasing and word play...and lest not forget to mention the internal rhymes that you sprinkled through out this, leaving me moth giddy How can I not let my tongue be caressed by your cadence How can I not be amazed at your assonance.. Reading this aloud was awesome!! And tost with him pebbles, all ingrates and rebels Until they decided where best they resided A universe cried when the little boy died I would really love to hear where this inspire of theme came from...its sooooo cool...such grand story telling with such creative employ of abstract, ethereal and fantasy essence in it as well as the bibilical and classic poetic drama and conflict that makes this kind of poetry. And ya know I am loving all the references to seasons and to the ocean...and to the trees...I loved those opening lines...and the repetion of them in your closing verse Did I ever tell ya I have a thing for trees? LOL Flew what, from the branches of willows in winter Whose green'ry did wilt and whose barkskin did splinter, This whole verse just says it all.... My heart far grew dimmer, my pity did blossom With petals so awkward as wings of a possum Who knew not to fly--and my doubts ne'er could cross him A bird of firm majesty, truly was he So upward I clame on his imagination To meet those two partners, their soft jubilation And took them by hands to explore their creation The shoreline, where they built a castle with me. Oh yeah...you rock...and it rolls me.  Very very well done poet sir!!!  You're the best I've ever felt ... it's so wrong not to be with you. It's getting harder to stay away, it stops my heart just to be with you. SH [This message has been edited by Janet Marie (05-13-2003 10:02 PM).] |
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Cpat Hair
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793 |
Oh yeah..I'm supposed to comment on this and follow the moth..lol.. sure..I can do that....let me see if I can condense my reply a bit since the moth circled your light quite extensivly.. very nice...I am always inmpressed with the language the ideas and the form you present... you have a gift and a talent..and we are all blessed that you chose to share it with us here. |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
Library... and back for a review only because I know you love 'em. |
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
LP...you are amazing..you write with such mastery and depth...I really don't know how to express or be deep enough myself to tell you the power you have over poetic expression. |
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Local Parasite
since 2001-11-05
Posts 2527Transylconia, Winnipeg |
JP - Thanks! I try. JM - You don't gotta worry about sounding redundant. I don't mind it at all. All it means is that I'm, uh, consistent...  And don't worry, I'm not repulsed by your reiteration, I'm not annoyed by your alliteration, I'm just enthralled by your enthusiasm, and flattered by your uh... flattery... (gimme a break, this isn't my thing).The inspiration came from a dream that I had, actually, and I know that makes me less creative but at least I'm being honest... I had a dream about walking on the beach and seeing a woman in the waves that came towards me. This poem is kind of my interpretation. I added my childhood and wrote this as a contrast between the past and present, my cold atheistic childhood that would see only nothing (Nothing), and then, my elder years which found this to be not enough, and chose instead to explore and seek truth, and found Beauty, and actually embraced her. That's the basic analysis of this one... in case you're interested. It's kind of personal, sure, but I think it has some stronger message behind it, too... that closing your eyes from truth will take you nowhere and leave you with nothing... Thanks for the resplendent reply, JM. Ron - Thanks for reading this, my friend... and thank you for your compliments. Don't worry about the moth, either... I think she's got a crush on me, that's all. Sunshine - I'm in your library? Well that's an honour. I imagine by now you have a pretty vast library, considering your post count and the fact that you've been here longer than most... it's a big compliment. As for the review, don't worry about it... it's a nice thought though.  Martie - I'm very flattered to have your approval... you're one of the poets whom I admire most at this site, and it's definitely a huge compliment to me. Thank you for taking the time to read me... Glad this one got such a nice response... thanks again to everyone who read this one. Poets are the unacknowledged legislators of the world. |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
SO -- its true then .... even when you sleep...that too is rhyme divine .... I figured that when you talk in your sleep it was in cadence..but you even dream poetry. |
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Marilyn Member Elite
since 1999-09-26
Posts 2621Ontario, Canada |
WOW, I just loved this. It is going into my favorite list. There are few who have made it to this list. PdV, Nan, Ron, Christopher (by the way, is he still around here? He is my favorite poet and always makes me think). There are a few more but I don't want to fill up this thread with all the greats from passions. (or forget any and have to come back as they come to mind...lol) I thankyou for giving me another poet to look for when reading through these halls. Marilyn. |
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wranx Member Elite
since 2002-06-07
Posts 3689Moved from a shack to a barn |
Well, I think the JM has this just about covered...I'll just add that it's a beauty. |
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ESP Member Elite
since 2000-01-25
Posts 2556Floating gently on a cloud.... |
What a poet...what was I thinking when I read it? Whoever knows this poet is really lucky and I wish I did. Thanks for a great read. Liz xx |
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