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The loss of a son
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The loss of a son |
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LoveBug
Moderator
Member Elite
since 2000-01-08
Posts 4697
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I'm messing with a little syllable scheme here. I hope it turned out ok, and I really hope it didn't take away from what I'm trying to say. I don't want to start a big debate here, but I do want to remind you all to think after you read this. Thanks for reading. Head bowed low In her maternal grief The rain pours down But her tears run faster As she mourns the loss of a son She looks back To when he was born The sheer beauty Of the gift of a life As she mourns the loss of a son She looks back When he was a child The perfect boy Momma’s little angel As she mourns the loss of a son She looks back He hit his manhood He changed so much He turned away from her She knows that’s when she lost her son She tried hard To kill his demons To make him whole She wasn't always there She had to work… as he got worse She looks on As the police take him He killed today He shot-up the schoolhouse She peers into his eyes… Nothing The others Look at her with hate She meets their eyes They seem to forget that She also mourns for her lost son No excuse She knows it’s her fault But she looks back To her other young son She refuses to lose this one Think, my friends Of the mourning mom Could this be you? With your tears streaming down As you mourn the loss of a child? Friends, take time Be there for your kids And please be kind Since the mourning mother Has also loved… and lost her child  "Men judge generally more by the eye than by the hand, for everyone can see and few can feel."-Machiavelli [This message has been edited by LoveBug (edited 03-06-2001).] |
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| © Copyright 2001 Erica N. - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
Erica--You have looked with sympathetic eyes at such a sad situation...It must be so hard for his parents, for they must also feel somehow responsible for his actions...with the thought forever in the back of their minds, "what could we have done that would have prevented this?" Good job with this poem! |
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Munda Member Elite
since 1999-10-08
Posts 3544The Hague, The Netherlands |
My goodness! This is heartbreaking beautiful and very true. Great job LoveBug! |
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Dopey Dope
Moderator
Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132San Juan, Puerto Rico |
"I wish I had a talent"- quote by Erica yea yea sure.......see! Look what I'm saying!!!! You're so talented and this proves it! So HA!  I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust. I'm in love with my shadow I admire it daily |
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Poet deVine
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-26
Posts 22612Hurricane Alley |
Erica, I read your heart in this peace. You captured the mother's feelings perfectly. Well done! |
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Elizabeth
Moderator
Member Ascendant
since 1999-06-07
Posts 6871Minnesota |
Erica, the syllables are fine...now on to my feelings about the piece....parents cannot be blamed for everything their children do...some of it yes, but there comes a point in time where the actions are solely those of the child, and people must realize it. The parents feel pain over the loss of their child and whatever trouble their child has gotten into, and they don't need self-righteous people preaching at them and glaring at them. Anyways, beautiful work....you captured it perfectly. P.S. Is this related to the school shootings? |
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Romy Senior Member
since 2000-05-28
Posts 1170Plantation, Florida |
But many people do blame the parents for the child's actions. It made my heart hurt to read this...I love my kids so much and only try to do the best for them, but ultimately they have to make decisions and choices on their own. I would never want to be in the shoes of a parent facing something like that. Your poem has a lot of emotional impact, good job. Debbie |
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Allan Riverwood
since 2001-01-04
Posts 3502Winnipeg |
Wow... this poem is magnificent. The syllable scheme made me squeal with glee.  Of course, you probably expected that from me.Now everyone else... I'm sure that Erica was writing the emotions of guilt that would be portrayed by the mother in this situation, and not necessarily her personal opinions. What is reflected in this piece is what the mother feels. I'll agree that we cannot blame anyone other than the son himself for these happenings. Not the mother, not the media, ~just~ the son. Once again, this poem is truly wonderful and I am putting it into my library. ~Allan If I had your eyes, I'd be blind. For I can only see out of my own. ~~Carly Van Dort |
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Alwye
Moderator
Member Elite
since 1999-06-16
Posts 3850In the space between moments |
Erica, this is incredibly moving....I am utterly blown away...you portrayed the guilt, the pain a mother would feel if her son had commited such an act..and you did it in a raw, powerful way. It's good to show people all aspects of things and this is definitely one that not many people think of. Absolutely stunning work my friend, I'm impressed!  *Krista Knutson* "Can't run fast enough Can't hide I can't fly I'm struggling with the limits of this ordinary life..." ~Tracy Chapman |
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anonymous albert ?
since 2001-03-23
Posts 2979 |
u expressed this so well.. a very powerful and very true poem wow... jus amazing how a poem can touch the reader.. i really liked the emotions in the poem thanks for sharing and keep writing  ...?death is not the greatest loss in life. the greatest loss is what dies inside us while we live. -norman cousins |
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kaile
since 2000-02-06
Posts 5146singapore |
thanx for showing us things from the mother's point of view. sometimes we lash all out at the parents when such tragedies happen and forget that they themselves are suffering too.... a wonderful read and in MHO, one that more people should have the opportunity to read and understand |
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