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Open Poetry #18

Innocence Forfeited

CD
Member

since 2001-01-27

Posts 101

0 posted 2002-01-25 08:32 PM

The single word
Spoken in oblivion
A double edged sword
That tore through the soul.

O what darkness has befallen
That innocence evolved to evil
That one may conspire against others
That innocence is naught

The storms have come
The darkness has prevailed
The goodness in man has failed
The love of a human is destroyed.

doreen peri
Member Elite

since 1999-05-25

Posts 3812
Virginia

1 posted 2002-01-25 09:30 PM

well first i have to say that i really hate it when that happens...when true love fails.... it's so sad

you've got lots of really good lines in here and i really like how you constructed this piece.... what really intrigues me is... the word.... your first stanza

quote:
The single word
Spoken in oblivion
A double edged sword
That tore through the soul.

geeezzzz.... it's got my head spinning trying to figure out which word was spoken that could cause this.... it's so important for people to realize that words are very powerful. Things you say cannot be taken back... but i'm thinking... what word? what one word? Once i said "NO" to a guy and that was enough for him, killed the love flat... LOL!!! .. hehe... but i can't think of "one single word" which has ever been said to me which caused love to die...

an intriguing write... t hank you for sharing this.

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