»
Archives
»
Open Poetry #18
»
Hovel
| Open Poetry #18 |
|
Hovel |
|
|
Professor Gloom Member Elite
since 2000-07-23
Posts 3082of Depression |
Just abandon boards forming flimsy walls, Rattles, shivers, and shakes with winter squalls A blanket door and not a window pane, Barely able to keep out snow and rain. Rugged hearth burns wet wood smoldering smoke, Stinging the eyes and his throat does it choke, No chairs for sitting nor pillow for head A grass woven mat is what he calls his bed. It is a rugged and challenging walk, To go and with this hovel dweller talk, I carry bags of rice and wheels of cheese, Lessen the hunger but the pain won’t ease. I catch my breath from the steep upward plod Soundless greeting giving only a nod, In time comes enlightened conversation, His words the reason this destination. We talk continuous throughout the night, I leave him once more with the new day’s light; How he continues there I’ll never know, But as long as he is living I will go. There are several of us that visit him, Bringing bits for his life trading wisdom. I’ll return once more the next waning moon, For my wisdom’s sake it can’t come too soon. Gloom |
||
| © Copyright 2002 Aszard Drazlom - All Rights Reserved | |||
Mistletoe Angel 
since 2000-12-17
Posts 32816Portland, Oregon |
 (big hugggssssss) So very sad but beautiful and hopeful, sweet friend, my heart cries out to the numbness he feels, but also so happy he lives with the beauty of words and has friends who watch over him to comfort and console with! (sigh) May he rise with his loving heart and find true happiness from where he sits! We all love you so much, sweet friend, this is wonderful! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Aszard, thank you for sharing!  May love and light always shine upon you! Love, Noah Eaton |
||
|
serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738 |
How you do manage to paint vivid pictures in shades of gray! This read like an old tin type photo--perhaps more sepia than gray. I think it's the attention to detail that I admire so much about your work. Enjoyed, as I always do! |
||
|
Canuckster Member
since 2002-01-09
Posts 285New Mexico, USA |
Always nice to see rhymed work and you've managed it here and created a wonderful aura round the whole piece. Fun Read! |
||
|
Professor Gloom Member Elite
since 2000-07-23
Posts 3082of Depression |
Thank you, Mistletoe Angel, Glad you enjoyed, but he’s there for Enlightenment, not happiness. Thank you, Serenity, Pleased you liked it, But if I started painting with RED again Detailing the pain; I fear that I’d get another censoring. Thank you, Canuckster, I prefer rhymed poetry and exacting meter And attempt to incorporate it into my writings, Thanks for the response. Gloom |
||
|
strbbux Member Elite
since 2001-12-19
Posts 3859 |
I love rhyming poems Professor and you did this so so well, I also enjoyed reading this piece. floria |
||
|
Zinsser Senior Member
since 2001-02-27
Posts 1641Calif. |
Gloom: you have eyes that see what so many ignore.... well done |
||
|
|
⇧ top of page ⇧ |
|
| All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format. | ||
