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Open Poetry #18
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Betrayal
| Open Poetry #18 |
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Betrayal |
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Elizabeth Santos Member Rara Avis
since 1999-11-08
Posts 9269Pennsylvania 
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Betrayal Sometimes I write poetic phrase Invisible to sunny days For it remains within the fold Of paper dreams I’ve never told Like scrolling on a page of white With ink of purest snowy white It’s there , but yet remains unseen Like crystal waters, clear, pristine Would I allow my heart to float Upon the sea on sailing boat? Would I allow my dreams to reach The sand dunes of a silver beach? I hold the intimate and dear In selfish lust, unknown, unclear To others who would dare to peek And into poet's chamber creep But then somehow the magic pen Betrays the trust of life long friend And turns the ink to midnight black More ebon than a raven’s back And there it is , exposed to all The secrets of the mind’s recall The dreams I’ve dreamt, though worn and old Carved into letters, grand and bold There is no use to place your pride In masquerade of sheepskin hide Another poet comes along And knows the lyrics to your song You may as well write from your heart Let all the pain and joy depart For there are many who will read And recognize the flower’s seed Elziabeth Santos |
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| © Copyright 2002 Elizabeth Santos - All Rights Reserved | |||
Mistletoe Angel 
since 2000-12-17
Posts 32816Portland, Oregon |
  (smiles) Soooooooo very well-said, sweet friend, I believe it takes alot of heart to write our most intimate secrets we hold dear, and when we do, it may seem like we betray ourselves, but as time goes on and compassion is brought before us, then we are so happy we made that bold step! (big hugggsssss) Sooooooo beautiful, sweet friend, we all love you so much, this is fabulous! (kiss on cheek) You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Elizabeth, thank you for sharing!  May love and light always shine upon you! Love, Noah Eaton |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
...and recognize the flower's seed... Oh Elizabeth.... |
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Canuckster Member
since 2002-01-09
Posts 285New Mexico, USA |
This captures the tension that many no doubt feel. There is in writing always a temptation to study the art and develop techniques which may result in technically superior work but lack the spark of passion that should drive a poem. I wrestle with this myself often. If anyone else has solved it, let me know. I agree with your conclusion that ultimately it must come from the heart. I also know that, no one wants to read writing when it is written rotten.  The poem itself is masterfully crafted with perfect cadance and rhyme. It's almost ironic as the poem itself stands in testimony of the need for skillful craftsmanship, which seems lightly in conflict with the message of the poem. Good work. never try to teach a pig to sing |
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Nightshade
since 2001-08-31
Posts 13962just out of reach |
What a pleasure this is to read first thing with my cup of tea!! Lovely. Chris Life is not measured by breaths you take, but by moments that take your breath away. |
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Irish Rose Member Patricius
since 2000-04-06
Posts 10263 |
You are one of the few people I know who can turn out stunning poetry on a regular basis. You have blessed all of us and in your own quiet, graceful way have given so unselfishly of your talent. Thank you, Liz. Kathleen--(Kay) |
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True Reflections Member
since 2001-12-04
Posts 143Ohio, USA |
Elizabeth, Do you talk like this in real life? You must think in rhyme, because you are too good to bring it out only when you are writing. I am bowing to your greatness. Ok, I'm now taking aspirin because I forgot my keyboard was there where I bowed. I'm seeing stars and there is one very bright one in the middle, that must be you. Roger |
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suthern
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723Louisiana |
You may as well write from your heart Let all the pain and joy depart For there are many who will read And recognize the flower’s seed Your pen may indeed betray your secrets... but it does so with beauty and reaches straight into another's (my *S*) heart. This is exquisite, Elizabeth. |
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Mysteria
since 2001-03-07
Posts 18328British Columbia, Canada |
Your writings have touched my heart so many times with that pen's betrayal. It is easy to recognize the seed that planted the words, but it is that same poetry that also plants a seed of healing in the same place in others. I too must say, there is no one that consistently writes beautiful thought provoking poetry that goes straight to the heart like you do Elizabeth. ~*~ Carpe' Diem ~*~ |
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peppermint35 Senior Member
since 2000-05-28
Posts 1106Texas, USA |
Thank you Elizabeth for reminding me.. sometimes I've forgotten that I love poetry for just the reason that it has always been therapeutic for me. I find it easier to express what I'm feeling deep inside through my poetry than to actually tell someone in words.. you do it very, very well  Hugz, Pepper |
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strbbux Member Elite
since 2001-12-19
Posts 3859 |
Elizabeth, I am so happy you are not using white ink,,then I would never be able to enjoy your wonderful words in poetry. This is wonderful. floria |
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