The Last Letter - deVine's challenge

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Sunshine

Administrator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-06-25

Posts 63354
Listening to every heart

0 posted 2001-12-30 07:33 PM

The Last Letter

If I had but one pen
Filled with blackest ink
To place upon God’s
Finest linen
Parched white,

Might I then leave this trace?
Look behind, a bit of quaking
By your leave,
A bit of word to once
Again heave

That heavy heart of
Loss, so great, so
Cheerless, so vain in
It's contempt that others
Yet live.

Aye, but you saw this
Coming, Death, so vapidly clear,
So fulfilled by having taken
Life, it had to have its ending
Now.

Yet, I would try but once
More to reach, past Death, beyond
This veil, that shields me
From you, but O God, I
Would achieve this endeavor

For once we loved, and once
We held love close, so close,
My dear heart, that great ache
Of separation could not even be
Conceived, and yet

Here we are, on this cusp
Of coming, and going,
This give and take of life
Ever more clear in
Death…

You held me in those final
Moments, ever so close, ever so
Tenderly, as if not to bruise me,
Though break I never would, only
Close my eyes

To perceive His radiance! My love,
It beckoned me beyond you,
And yet, woulds’t thou but
Allow me one last
Yearning, I should then

Take but one pen
Filled with blackest ink
To place upon God’s
Finest linen
Parched white,

Might I then leave this trace?
Look behind, a bit of waking
By your leave,
A bit of word to once
Again heave

A breath into your soul,
To await one day, a lone
Good moment, dear heart,
When we shall meet again,
By my promise, by this,

My Last Letter

©Karilea Rilling Jungel
30 December 2001

Poet deVine's Challenge: Write a poem in the form of a loveletter - it can be to anyone and it can be affirming love, saying goodbye to love (Dear John style) or could be a love letter to a child or parent or friend...

[This message has been edited by Sunshine (12-31-2001 10:01 AM).]

amusemi
Senior Member

since 2001-12-08

Posts 1262
A State of Disarray

1 posted 2001-12-30 07:36 PM

Stunning work! I liked this promise:

"A breath into your soul,
To await one day, a lone
Good moment, dear heart,
When we shall meet again,
By my promise, by this,

My Last Letter"

SEA

Moderator

Member Seraphic

since 2000-01-18

Posts 22676
with you

2 posted 2001-12-30 07:37 PM

you, are perfectly amazing,
this style, the emotion...
wraps the words around my heart
melting them into me.
Loved this............

Magnus

Member Laureate

since 2001-10-10

Posts 14135
South Carolina, USA

3 posted 2001-12-30 07:38 PM

Karilea...this is a beautiful but somber
write...You express yourself with such
depth...Well done lady...

Enchantress
Member Empyrean

since 2001-08-14

Posts 35113
Canada eh.

4 posted 2001-12-30 07:40 PM

Karilea~I am at a loss for words...again!
Brilliant work here....hugs, Nancy

*~ Wishing everyone a New Year filled with Peace & Love ~*

Martie

Moderator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-09-21

Posts 28049
California

5 posted 2001-12-30 08:32 PM

Karilea--when you say you will, you do, and with style and flair..but most importantly, with heart!!!

catalinamoon

Member Rara Avis

since 2000-06-03

Posts 9543
The Shores of Alone

6 posted 2001-12-30 08:39 PM

This is amazing. Feels almost like an old Millay poem to me.
Happy New Year. Thank you for all the beautiful poems and replies this year.
Sandra

Poet deVine

Administrator

Member Seraphic

since 1999-05-26

Posts 22612
Hurricane Alley

7 posted 2001-12-30 10:09 PM

*sniff! Ok, Ok...this is so lovely. You're breaking my heart here......you've definitely met this challenge. I shall put this into my library. Thank you.

Janet Marie
Member Laureate

since 2000-01-22

Posts 18554

8 posted 2001-12-30 10:35 PM

For once we loved, and once
We held love close, so close,
My dear heart, that great ache
Of separation could not even be
Conceived, and yet
=================================

Might I then leave this trace?
Look behind, a bit of waking
By your leave,
A bit of word to once
Again heave

A breath into your soul,
To await one day, a lone
Good moment, dear heart,
When we shall meet again,
By my promise, by this,
====================================

good grief...anyone ever tell you that you dont play fair *L*
Pulled out all the big guns for this...
the vocab, verbiage and language in this is excecptional K.
very well done Poetess Sun

Marge Tindal

Member Empyrean

since 1999-11-06

Posts 42384
Florida's Foreverly Shores

9 posted 2001-12-30 10:52 PM

Karilea~
Delicately lovely~
Happy New Year wishes to you, my friend~
*Hugs*
~*Marge*~

~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~
[email protected]

Mysteria

Member Laureate

since 2001-03-07

Posts 18328
British Columbia, Canada

10 posted 2001-12-31 03:04 AM

Goodness sake this was "perfect"! You know how they used to sit and swoon in days of old while poetry was read? Their sighs would come and go, well...that is what I was doing reading this poem, so if I do that sitting here all alone in semi-darkness, this is one darn good poem that is for certain LOL!

~*~ Happy New Year ~*~
~* Carpe' Diem *~

Dee
Member Elite

since 2000-08-19

Posts 2330
Queensland, Australia

11 posted 2001-12-31 06:08 AM

Wow, Sunshine this is so powerful. I love it.

Dee

I wish you every happiness and may you always have the best of the good things in life. a brand

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