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CondorSey
Junior Member

since 2001-12-24

Posts 28
Dam-Nation

0 posted 2001-12-24 01:08 PM

Bittersweet stories, long ago dead
of dear friends who now live in my head
Dreaming to the day when grief is no more
Reality is the reaper who slams shut the door.

Long do I haggle to buy back a day
please send me back, a second I?ll stay
Let me relive those moments of fun
of the game, the date or things I had done.

Much do I regret, more do I pout
Cursing madly at all, I scream and I shout
Others I accuse, though blame is on I
but forever shall I rue, ever til I die.

Let's put the FUN back into Dysfunctional.

SEA

Moderator

Member Seraphic

since 2000-01-18

Posts 22676
with you

1 posted 2001-12-24 01:29 PM

I like your writings...

Mistletoe Angel

Member Empyrean

since 2000-12-17

Posts 32816
Portland, Oregon

2 posted 2001-12-24 01:30 PM

(sigh) I believe we all have these kind of regrets, and I know just how you feel, for I wish I could go back and find more precious memories and fun! (sigh) I feel deep down a slong as we try and forget and forgive and listen to our loving hearts and look up to each new day, we will never again regret so much, and find joy and cheer always! (big hugggssssss) We all love you so much, sweet friend! You have suhc a beautiful heart, sweet friend, thank you for sharing!

May love and light always shine upon you!

Love,
Noah Eaton

Tracey
Member Elite

since 2001-08-29

Posts 2808
where insanity meets breeding

3 posted 2001-12-24 01:35 PM

I could have written this..you echo many feelings I have felt with this piece. I concur with Sea, I like your writings.

If she who dies with the most toys wins, then can I have some toy boys please?

Janet Marie
Member Laureate

since 2000-01-22

Posts 18554

4 posted 2001-12-26 09:19 AM

I enjoyed the cadence and phrasing in this...
you should give your self more credit than your critique statement.
"low-level sub-ametuer pseudo-writer"

Welcome to Poetry Land CondorSey...
this is indeed the place to learn, grow, and be inspired....
I look forward to more of your work.
jm

You're the hidden cost and the thing that's lost in everything I do.
Thats the way love is ... sky blue and black.

Mon Cherie

Senior Member

since 2001-10-31

Posts 922
Land of Never-ending Summers

5 posted 2001-12-26 10:12 AM

Your writing is good, and not as low-leveled and amateurish as you think.

And whatever happened to you and your friends, I hope there's a way to become friends again. A quarrel? A fight? What's more important than being good friends?

_,,,^.^,,,_
Florence

Opeth
Senior Member

since 2001-12-13

Posts 1543
The Ravines

6 posted 2001-12-26 11:00 AM

This I liked very much. Broody and desolate is what I sense.

[This message has been edited by Opeth (12-26-2001 11:13 AM).]

peaches73533
Senior Member

since 2001-11-04

Posts 981
OK, USA

7 posted 2001-12-26 11:51 AM

You have touched so many feelings that so many of us feel.Nicely written.
Peaches

Irish Rose
Member Patricius

since 2000-04-06

Posts 10263

8 posted 2001-12-26 11:53 AM

yes, welcome and love your quote btw,

Kathleen (Kay)
"When red-haired girls scamper like roses over the rain-green grass, and the sun drips honey."
Laurie Lee

CondorSey
Junior Member

since 2001-12-24

Posts 28
Dam-Nation

9 posted 2001-12-26 10:27 PM

Thank you all for the responses.

This was written about a very close and dear friend who I am still friends with, but not as we used to be. We are still good friends, but do not share the time we once did. She is now married and 'walks' with her husband.

Feel free to 'borrow' this or any of my other work.

Let's put the FUN back into Dysfunctional.

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