I Can Prove I'm a Cat (Sequel to "Mouse")

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Elizabeth Santos
Member Rara Avis

since 1999-11-08

Posts 9269
Pennsylvania

0 posted 2001-12-18 12:22 PM

I Can Prove I’m a Cat

I don’t shrivel or hide from remarks to the fact
I happen to be the most wonderful cat
I usually finagle to get what I please
I’m a cunning and clever persnickety tease

My food dish is filled at the regular time
With only the best and the favorites of mine
But I’ve noticed lately that something’s amiss
I have never been shunned or neglected like this

There are cuttings of Swiss cheese all over the house
To pamper and honor the likes of a mouse!
They say he’s a hero, a wizard , a champ!
(That sly little nothing, that wimp of a scamp!)

They say he saved Christmas, (but between me and you)
Any old cat could have opened that flue
It’s a no-brainer task of the simplest kind
A thoughtless and trivial whim of the mind

Oh, why didn’t I see it ? Oh, why didn’t I act?
For I knew of the dire calamitous fact
But I’d eaten my dinner, my tummy was full
And I slept through the very most noteworthy Yule

I could have saved Christmas, as easy as pie
With paws tied behind me, and closing one eye
Let me now show my tactics and agile moves
Avoiding the ash in the grate and the groves

You just leap up and grab that old chain with your claws
But she fliped and she landed on four littlepaws,
She tried it again and again and again
A mission of purpose, a task without end

I will prove it to everyone here in this house
That I am a cat, not a wimp of a mouse
So she leaped and held tightly for minutes somehow
The flue flipped on open ...The cat took a bow

Then suddenly cold wind swept into the room
And ashes and soot had in total consumed
The chairs and the carpets, new sofa and all
And she heard a slight giggle from out in the hall

The mouse there observing the feats of a cat
Her immaculate fur now all grimy and black
She gathered her senses and suddenly knew
That a storm lay ahead in the wake of a flue

Before she could think, someone started to shout
With the sweep of a broom she was whisked right on out
No dinner for you, you can sit in the damp
You nasty old feline, you wimp of a scamp!

A cat on a window sill gazing on in
At a mouse looking back with a triumphant grin
With Swiss cheese in hand and a pillow of down
The hero of heroes was wearing the crown

The rivalry here can not be under-rated
For cat and mouse antics are often misstated
The mouse became naughty and shredded to bits
The deed to the house and the mistress had fits

The cat was a goody and kept to herself
Envisioning next year to be Santa’s elf
Behaving ‘til Christmas, (but between me and you)
Disaster will follow her flip of a flue

Elziabeth Santos

Decaflame
Senior Member

since 2001-05-11

Posts 1635

1 posted 2001-12-18 12:32 PM

ROTF....I can just see LongJohn clambering all over himself to come up with some ingenious reply, but then behaving, because of you! This is just charming...

RosePetal

Member Elite

since 2001-08-26

Posts 2985
South Florida

2 posted 2001-12-18 12:40 PM

I like this, it is so cute!

RosePetal

Member Elite

since 2001-08-26

Posts 2985
South Florida

3 posted 2001-12-18 12:41 PM

Very cute, no wait, its purrfect!

Mistletoe Angel

Member Empyrean

since 2000-12-17

Posts 32816
Portland, Oregon

4 posted 2001-12-18 01:17 PM

(smiles) Soooooooo cute and clever, sweet friend! (sigh) I feel sorry for both the cat and the mouse; I hope the cat does get elected as an elf! (giggles) Your words are always so exciting to read, I love them!!! (kiss on cheek) You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Elizabeth, thank you for sharing!

May love and light always shine upon you!

Love,
Noah Eaton

Duncan
Member Ascendant

since 2001-08-07

Posts 5455

5 posted 2001-12-18 01:46 PM

I think I'll read this to my cats...they'll hate it! Loving your series. Most peoples multiple personalities aren't nearly this funny.

Mysteria

Member Laureate

since 2001-03-07

Posts 18328
British Columbia, Canada

6 posted 2001-12-18 04:17 PM

Oh Elizabeth you are truly one of a kind, this is absoutely priceless, and I will read both on Thursday to the old folks and they will be rolling down the isles~thank you sweetie!

~*~ The Very Best Of The Season To You And Yours ~*~

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