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Open Poetry #17
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DarkAngelChelle
Member
since 2001-12-06
Posts 87
Kansas

0 posted 2001-12-06 11:31 PM


(Yay!  My first poem posted here  .)

Steady rhythm of drumbeats
fills gathering dusky twilight
as the sun bids farewell to the land.
Fiery fingers claw into growing darkness
as torches neatly line the straight stone pathway
leading to the eternal edge
of the Sacred Cenote.
The weight of past ghosts haunts every shadow,
their presence heavy on this ritual evening.

Dancing figures explode into the scene;
painted bodies and colorful masks
assault the black of night
as the crowd is hypnotized in both fear and awe.

She appears at the start of the road,
a maiden dressed in finest clothes,
materializing out of the gloom like a phantom,
or a dream.

Her legs shake.

She takes tentative steps,
lips trembling as she searches the sea of faces.
Brother Wind playfully grabs her dress as she walks,
stirring it,
fringes chasing each other around her ankles,
colorful shells and beads jingle softly
in a strangely joyful dirge.

The end of the way meets her too quickly.
She suddenly stands before the ledge,
and stares into the still pool of death below.
She holds up her arms, palms out,
entreating the priest for reprieve,
feet already poised to run away.

But destiny makes no exception
as the blow whistles out of open air.
All at once she is falling,
falling,
beginning her descent into history.

Hands unconsciously strain toward fading lights
as all her world becomes awash in a blanket of red.
Briefly buoyed in a dramatic splash,
her eyes momentarily clear
before forever's waters claim her body.
She sinks underneath the surface,
embalmed in a cold, wet grave.
Struggling against inevitability,
her efforts are useless in the coming storm.

She can hear them,
the hoofbeats of the Ancients;
faster,
frantic,
the pounding pulse reverberates in her head,
then slows and weakens as they reach her,
gently enfolding their awaiting arms,
drawing out her spirit,
and leaving behind only limp, lifeless limbs.

As the mighty Chac whisks her away,
the empty shell floats to the floor of bones below.
Skeletal remains grotesquely embrace
and welcome their newest Sister,
whose fate has led her
to share this final resting place.

~What is cherished most is what must be the hardest fought for.~

© Copyright 2001 Michelle Hamilton - All Rights Reserved
LngJhnAg
Member Elite
since 1999-07-23
Posts 3508
Boot+Kitty=Poetry in motion
1 posted 2001-12-06 11:44 PM


First - Chelle - Welcome to Passions in Poetry.  In these Forums you will make friends and find warmth, support, even love.

Second - What a fantastic debut!  The prose is disturbing, because I wanted her to live, and you denied that.  But you did it in a wonderful, intelligent way.

Third - Do not trust a scalawag named Balladeer, as he will write terrific poetry; but, he will also try to get you to divulge your innermost fantasies, and then he will tell them to me...errr.... other people.  To preserve your secrets, tell them to me first!  I will then tell them to people who have promised to keep secrets as well as me.  OK?

Once again, welcome.  I think you will find this a wonderful site, filled with fun and learning.

[This message has been edited by LngJhnAg (edited 12-06-2001).]

Janet Marie
Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554

2 posted 2001-12-07 01:06 AM


Welcome to Poetry Land DA-Chelle.
Your imagery is most impressive and this is quite a creative, imaginative piece.
Would love to hear your inspire on this.
Its so nice to have you here with us.  
take care
jm

Sprayed across my heart and hers
danced butterflies in the wild.
This angel, this woman,
who loves me with the innocence of a child.

DeVante'

Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354
Listening to every heart
3 posted 2001-12-07 08:35 AM



Wow...this one is a Keeper, and I shall read it again and again...Welcome to Passions!  Please check your e-mail for a special Greeting!

Karilea
If I whisper, will you listen?...
I would rather be silent and write, than speak loudly and be bound.


Irish Rose
Member Patricius
since 2000-04-06
Posts 10263

4 posted 2001-12-07 08:38 AM


Welcome this is fantastic.

Good to have you here, this is VERY good.

Kathleen (Kay)
"When red-haired girls scamper like roses over the rain-green grass, and the sun drips honey."
Laurie Lee

OWG
Member
since 2001-03-19
Posts 155
California
5 posted 2001-12-07 09:02 AM


First..welcome..second...where was this again...I think I know that lady...(grin)

hollow cold and ripped apart beauty wrapped up in this piece...dug it huge

Enchantress
Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113
Canada eh.
6 posted 2001-12-07 09:15 AM



Very impressive first post!!
Can't wait to see more of your work!
     ~Hugs, Nancy Lee~

"A dream is a wish your heart makes..."

Seymour Tabin
Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720
Tamarac Fla
7 posted 2001-12-07 09:24 AM


Chelle,
Welcome and an ipressive first. You will enjoy it here.

RosePetal
Deputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Elite
since 2001-08-26
Posts 2985
South Florida
8 posted 2001-12-07 03:00 PM


Chelle,

This is quite creative! Nice entrace, I hope you will enjoy it here as much as I do.
I see one of my fellow moderators already sent you a special greetings so I will just give you a warm WELCOME!!!

Elizabeth
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Moderator
Member Ascendant
since 1999-06-07
Posts 6871
Minnesota
9 posted 2001-12-07 03:03 PM


Very intense and powerful. Nicely written Michelle, and good to meet you!  

God bless America, my home sweet home.

DarkAngelChelle
Member
since 2001-12-06
Posts 87
Kansas
10 posted 2001-12-08 12:06 PM


Thank you, everyone, for making me feel so welcome !  I've been enjoying my stay here so far, and I hope to be around for awhile  .  I appreciate all your comments and the fact that you all took the time to read my work.  I can already tell that I'm going to like it here  .  

Janet Marie - My inspiration for this piece came from a trip to Mexico.  We went and visited the ruins at Chichen Itza, and I am fascinated by the culture of the ancient Mayan civilization.

Once again, thanks to everyone.  I'll see you around  .

~What is cherished most is what must be the hardest fought for.~

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