Open Poetry #17 |
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While You Were Sleeping |
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Mon Cherie![]() ![]()
since 2001-10-31
Posts 922Land of Never-ending Summers ![]() |
This was inspired by the movie of the same title which I really love. ![]() ~~~~~~ I was overwhelmed I was in shock A stranger unconscious After an assault I thought YOU were The man of my dreams Now I must get help Very loudly I screamed I met your family in the ICU That cold Christmas morning Their warmth filled me Their love overflowing They love each other That was so obvious I never knew such affections I felt so envious They thought I am your fiancee Yet I am only a stranger They behold me for the first time Yet treated me like a daughter Your mother held me tight She was even weeping I hope I could tell them About the lies I was weaving I met your brother Jack His eyes twinkled with mischief He comes with a warm smile And a husky voice to fit I am sure he was suspicious Of my questionable background The coincidents were in my favour Luck; the only reason I am still around These initial barriers Soon broken down He made me smile Turning frowns upside-down ![]() ![]() Of the great aspirations We both speak The tour to Florence That I would take Now you awake from your coma You; the man of my dreams But now I love another man One of a different print I have fallen in love With Jack, your brother Do not blame me now For I can love no other You said it happened so fast You had little time to think Well you didn't stand a chance It happened while you were sleeping ~~~~~~~~~ Please give me your comments on this as I am not too sure if this counts as poetry. While I was writing this, I was thinking it feels more like story-telling... ![]() _,,,^.^,,,_ |
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© Copyright 2001 Mon Cherie - All Rights Reserved | |||
Logan Senior Member
since 2001-05-28
Posts 1641Arkansas |
Ahh, Mon Cherie, the read was delightful, and as one that tells more stories than as poetry goes, I liked it very much, very gentle smile |
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Startime Member Ascendant
since 2000-10-03
Posts 5918Canada |
I love it.......if it feels like a poem than I love it and this one feels like a poem to me. You covered the story in a unique way and brought back the memory of the movie very clearly to me. **hugs** Love I leave with you whether it is in your life now or yet the essense of your dreams. |
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Mon Cherie![]() ![]()
since 2001-10-31
Posts 922Land of Never-ending Summers |
Thank you!!! Merci!!!! That was really reassuring. It is! ![]() I was getting a little worried there... haha _,,,^.^,,,_ Florence [This message has been edited by Mon Cherie (edited 12-04-2001).] |
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Interloper![]() ![]()
since 2000-11-06
Posts 8369Deep in the heart |
Well done, indeed! Fool, said my Muse to me, look in thy heart and write. |
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Mistletoe Angel![]() ![]() ![]()
since 2000-12-17
Posts 32816Portland, Oregon |
![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() CLAPPING WILDLY!!! OH MON, WHAT A BEAUTIFUL EXPRESSION OF FAMILY LOVE!!! (big hugggsssss) This is soooooo beautiful, sweet friend! (kiss on cheek) I always love your words; I think that this is a poem and what a beautiful poem it is! (smiles) I love it!!! (kiss on cheek) I love you, sweet friend! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet friend, thank you for sharing! May love and light always shine upon you! Love, Noah Eaton |
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True Reflections Member
since 2001-12-04
Posts 143Ohio, USA |
Florence, I really liked your poem. This is one of my favorite movies also. I like all the 'searching for love' movies of Meg Ryan and Sandra Bullock. Very well done. Roger |
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Mon Cherie![]() ![]()
since 2001-10-31
Posts 922Land of Never-ending Summers |
Interloper: Thank you!! ^.^ Mistletoe Angel: Thank you Noah, I think it's beautiful because the story behind the show is so beautiful, it's even inspiring... ![]() True Reflections: Roger, thanks for enjoying this poem. ![]() ![]() ![]() _,,,^.^,,,_ |
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