Open Poetry #17 |
Across a Field of Lilacs Spread........Marge Challenge |
Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA |
Across a field of lilacs spread Like downy blanket soft and fine Beneath the heat of summer's day Your freckled face smiled out at mine. Your pig-tails flying in the breeze Brought out the first-grade love in me As futures lie before us spread Like pathways to eternity. Through school we went, inseparable My class ring on your finger small Our names in hearts with blackboard chalk Proclaiming puppy love to all. Then I was called to go away As duty to my country came And lilac tears were shared as we Vowed one day things would be the same. What happens to a soldier's mind When faced with war's insanity Humanity turned inhumane With young men dying needlessly? Somewhere the 'little boy' got lost As innocence was blown away And, by the time that I was through I found that I had lost my way. I wandered through the years alone A soldier in civilian clothes Who couldn't wash the blood away Or lose the shame a soldier knows. On nights when pain was less intense My dreams would bring your face in view With pig-tails flying in the breeze And lilac fields that we once knew. Now life has entered winter's chill As summer's fire has all been burned. My path has finally brought me home So, here at last, I have returned. They tell me that you never married Lived a nice life quietly Became a teacher in the school And always spoke the best of me. They say the whole town wept for you And even Jesus shed a tear And opened arms to welcome you When sickness took your life last year. So here I stand...I place a lilac Lovingly upon your stone. I bid farewell to childhood romance And to life I might have known. Across a field of lilacs spread I see the sadness in your eye. You say you love me one last time And then you turn and wave goodbye. |
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© Copyright 2001 Michael Mack - All Rights Reserved | |||
OLIAS Senior Member
since 2000-06-20
Posts 1090Pearl city Iowa |
Simply superb, you have a great talent at story telling sir, this has great depth and sincerity, thank you. Regards, Olias. |
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Rex Allen McCoy Member Elite
since 2000-01-30
Posts 2863Sippin a Timmy's in London |
A pleasure to read such a wonderful telling |
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EagleScorpion Senior Member
since 2000-03-08
Posts 1644Here, Now, Forever |
Balladeer.. in utmost honesty, I must tell you that this is one of the best ones I've read in a GOOD deal of time. So tragic, yet so goshdarn beautiful. Love is God. Love is war. Love is what your life is for. |
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Poet deVine
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-26
Posts 22612Hurricane Alley |
I knew if I read it, I would cry. I was right. Beautiful sir..simply beautiful. |
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Midnitesun
since 2001-05-18
Posts 28647Gaia |
From the side effects of the flu, I've had runny eyes and nose for four days. My eyes finally stopped running this afternoon, or so I thought. What a sadly beautiful poem, a tribute to first sweet love, and the lost innocence of youth. Have a spare tissue? |
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doreen peri Member Elite
since 1999-05-25
Posts 3812Virginia |
beautiful michael |
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peaches73533 Senior Member
since 2001-11-04
Posts 981OK, USA |
Mostr beautiful.I cried as I read this.Your writng always amazes me. Peaches |
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nakdthoughts Member Laureate
since 2000-10-29
Posts 19200Between the Lines |
I've lived most of this, but with a twist...you got to me. "For it was not into my ear you whispered, but into my heart. |
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Kethry Member Rara Avis
since 2000-07-29
Posts 9082Victoria Australia |
I never thought of Lilacs as being flowers of sorrow...now it will bne difficult to think of them otherwise. Beautiful sir! just beautiful. Keth Here in the midst of my lonely abyss, a single joy I find...your presence in my mind. Unknown |
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LngJhnAg Member Elite
since 1999-07-23
Posts 3508Boot+Kitty=Poetry in motion |
Well done, Micheal. You got those tears flowing in all those female eyes. I liked it too, but I am a man, and I refuse to blubber. BTW - I thought lilacs were a bush that grows 8-10 feet tall, so a filed of them would be kind of remarkable - yes? |
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Marsha
since 2000-07-10
Posts 7423Maidstone Kent England |
'Deer dear heart, why do you do this to me? Hmmmmmmmm, between you and Keth I've spent the past half hour crying. I know why Keth does it, it's a deliberate attempt on her part to present me to the world with blotchy face and red rimmed eyes But you dear boy, this brought the tears flowing down in streams. Utterly wonderful writing as always, I shall now retire from the lists, I knew I didn't stand an earthly with all the other poets. But yours stands head and shoulders above the rest. Margie girl, you need look no further this is definitely the winner Oh well, c'est la vie, I'm off now to repair the ravages of my face. How can you two do this to me, red rimmed eyes and blotchy do not add to my allure at all. This is a fabulous poem, with a really well written story in it, as always it is poetry at it's best. Truly outstanding Love and warm stuff As always Mushy Okay I forgive you for being incredibly good, I forgive you for making me red eyed, but did you have to win so easily? Yes I suppose you must. To give light to them that sit in darkness..... to guide our feet into the way of peace St John ch2 v1 |
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Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla |
Mike, Well you know how I feel about your poetry. Like the song goes, "If I was a rich man," I would publish you. See you soon. |
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Lady In White
since 2001-02-12
Posts 2799USA |
Sy says he's a rich man, having read this penning of perfection... would we all stay rich in your words, for once again, you show us what is in the heart, and why a poet should always leave one's best behind... Thank you for this. |
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SEA
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 2000-01-18
Posts 22676with you |
Balladeer, no one writes like you do. No one can even come close. this is truly amazing. As are you. |
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Charisma
since 2000-09-30
Posts 5906lost in blue pages |
everyone above said it, and all I can do is to agree with them...YOU are an incredible writer who knows how to bring up some tears.....yep me too need a tissue. ((hugs)) charisma ~*Theresia~* |
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Sudhir Iyer Member Ascendant
since 2000-04-26
Posts 6943Mumbai, India : now in Belgium |
only you can come up with something as wonderful as this, O Sir Balladeer... My regards, sudhir |
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
Balladeer--A story that squeezes the heart, so beautifully done. You are a gifted poet! |
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Enchantress Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113Canada eh. |
Balladeer, no one writes like you...NO ONE! Superb! This morning was a total waste of makeup and I have to run off and clean up my mascara smudged face. But, it was well worth it! You dear 'deer' are one remarkable writer and human being! You are not afraid to let you sensitive side show through your strong masculinity. ~hugs, Nancy~ "A dream is a wish your heart makes..." |
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cpalmer Senior Member
since 2001-06-26
Posts 977Phoenix, Az |
I cried while reading this! The life unknown! (sigh) beautifully written! Hugs Cindi |
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PoetriPrincess Member
since 2001-11-17
Posts 55CA / U.S.A |
Childhood Sweet, beautifully done Balladeer enjoyable read sounds like a classic. A Musician must make his Music, |
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Kit McCallum
Administrator
Member Laureate
since 2000-04-30
Posts 14774Ontario, Canada |
"On nights when pain was less intense My dreams would bring your face in view With pig-tails flying in the breeze And lilac fields that we once knew." "So here I stand...I place a lilac Lovingly upon your stone. I bid farewell to childhood romance And to life I might have known." A wonderful form you've used Michael .. the cadence lended itself beautifully to this delicate and tender weave. You wrapped me so up in this sweet story, that I had to give a gulp when you told us she was gone. Amazing how your characters are always so real in my mind. Is it too odd to ask you to give him a hug from me? Best wishes, /Kit |
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Denise
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-08-22
Posts 22648 |
*tears* blubbering here. Excellent writing, Michael. Very well done. LngJhn, yes, I do believe that the lilac is technically a bush or tree, but if you have a whole bunch of them when they are babies you could conceivably have what looks like a field! Ah well, poetic license and all that! |
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Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA |
OLIAS...thank you for your kind words Rex...your comment is appreciated! Eagle Scorpion..I'm very glad you enjoyed it. Thank you! DeVine one..as is your kind reply.. Midnitesun..I HAVE spare tissues...and I deliver! Doreen.. I thank you Peaches..what a nice thing to say! Thank you nakdthoughts..I hope yours was a happier ending..thanks for allowing me to get to you Kethry..the poem is make-belive. Lilacs are real and shall always be beautiful LongJohn...I checked with Marge, who came up with the phrase, and she told me they were bonzai lilies....so there! mushy girl...Don't you dare give up! I'm not in the contest...I've got 12 of those books!! LOL! So keep writing and don'a make me come over there and spank you....oh, you would, would you?? Sy..well, get out there and get rich! I need ya!! Thank you, my friend lady...and I thank you for that. You are a very gracious lady SEA...What a wonderful supporter you are! Thank you, sweet lady (Mickey is calling...) Charisma..You are so kind...my tissue would be honored to touch those cheeks sudhir..I thank you, sir. Praise from you is always appreciated, sir.. Martie...it would take two hands to squeeze a heart as large as yours..thank you for the words Enchantress..you don't need makeup! A smile on your face does just fine...thank you for letting me place one there cpalmer...the life unknown indeed! We all have them..forks in the road not taken. Thank you for reading... Princess..if you enjoyed it, then I succeeded! Thank you.... Kit..I'll give him a hug for you if you give it to me to give to him! Of course, it may feel so good I may want to keep it for myself!! Denise...thank you for your blubber and for straightening out that trouble-making sailor! Poetic license! YES! |
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Marge Tindal
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384Florida's Foreverly Shores |
Balladeer~ You scalawag ... just HAD to go and make the 'judge' blubber, didn't you ? This one definitely gets a HUG from the 'judge' ... and perhaps and 'Honorable Pinch-tion' This is beautiful ... thank you~ Love you, sweet poet~ *HUGS* ~*Marge*~ ~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~ |
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SEA
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 2000-01-18
Posts 22676with you |
Hey Balladeer (the Pacific is calling you) "If your ship doesn't come in, swim out to it." ~Jonathan Winters |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
Forget the autographed book....... this poem deserves a SPAM SCULPTURE You are the man with the golden pen poet sir. rhyme divine with a morale that will be held in time. Im glad my name aint Margie the judge |
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Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA |
Marge...I will be you honorable men-tion any time! Can't wait for judgement day! SEA... Janet Marie..Is it asking too much that the Spam sculpture be of you? Now THAT would be a prize!! Thank you, sweet lady |
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LadySofia Member
since 2000-05-16
Posts 238FL., USA |
My, Balladeer, my condolences. I am glad not to have known the blood of wartime. I would serve my country if need be, but your poem explains why I won't enlist. Such prices to pay. Thank you for that momentous pause that brought reflection. ^_^ LadySofia |
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Joyce Johnson
since 2001-03-10
Posts 9912Washington State |
This is beautiful and I enjoyed it very much. I always look for your poetry when i come to this forum. Joyce |
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suthern
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723Louisiana |
I didn't realize I was holding my breath until I finished... it's that beautiful!!! Bless Marge for bringing forth this treasure from you, Deer One... it's going straight into my library. *S* |
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misguided angel Member
since 2001-11-23
Posts 106Australia |
Oh Balladeer, this is so touching, brought a tear or two to my eyes. (mainly cause there is so much truth in it) Andrea Summon the courage to step out of your familiar rut and suddenly many of those things which held you back will no longer have the power to do so. |
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Titia Geertman Member Ascendant
since 2001-05-07
Posts 5182Netherlands |
I say just WOW and AHH and OHHH and SIGH and HUGS and and to you my sweet poet Balladeer Titia A rose is a rose is a rose...I guess... |
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Mysteria
since 2001-03-07
Posts 18328British Columbia, Canada |
Well all I have to say is that I am in awe. Fantastic Michael, and a lot of feelings are in this one, that I enjoyed so much and will save for years to come. ~*~ Carpe' Diem ~*~ |
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rwood Member Elite
since 2000-02-29
Posts 3793Tennessee |
I am late...but please know that this is a wonderful gem. A haunting picture of love and innocence and the loss of it. Such a poignant write. Saving these memories of Lilacs. Thank you for being you. Sincerely, Regina |
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Elizabeth Santos Member Rara Avis
since 1999-11-08
Posts 9269Pennsylvania |
Bowing to you, Sir Michael LIz |
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Blaec Member
since 2001-04-23
Posts 130The Sunshine State |
What a way to start my day! It's only 10am and already I am in tears. This is beautiful. I always look forward to reading your poetry. - Kris |
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Nan
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-20
Posts 21191Cape Cod Massachusetts USA |
I'm all pringly, Deer... |
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Gentle Spirit Member Patricius
since 2000-10-09
Posts 13989 |
Deer, this is awesome, but how did you know that lilacs were my favorite. On the wings of words our spirits fly....and our souls are free. |
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True Reflections Member
since 2001-12-04
Posts 143Ohio, USA |
Simply outstanding. Very visual and captivating. Roger |
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