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1slick_lady
Member Ascendant

since 2000-12-22

Posts 6088
standing on a shadow's lace

0 posted 2001-09-20 05:37 PM

Rock Support

I had
built my dreams
upon the sand
sliding foundation
would not
let them stand
harsh winds carried
some to four corners
grain by grain
ocean waves melted
many away
by sheer will
a few
did remain
gathering
what was left
to place
on solid ground
support
of a rock
a great strength found
safe in the comfort
again dreams
sprout and grow
a foundation rebuilt
that crumbled
from below

"...the rest is silence" (Hamlet) Shakespeare

The Rusty Knight
Member

since 2001-08-29

Posts 414
Texas

1 posted 2001-09-20 09:02 PM

I like the way you divided this poem up...we all have our shifting sand and this piece makes you stop and think of where your touchstone is.

Death comes not when we cease to breathe, but when we cease to dream.

[This message has been edited by The Rusty Knight (edited 09-21-2001).]

rwood
Member Elite

since 2000-02-29

Posts 3793
Tennessee

2 posted 2001-09-21 06:35 AM

I really loved this. Our foundation has been rocked, and things have slid off kilter, but we have gathered our hope and took it to stronger ground. Peace and Love.

Sincerely,
Regina

Zinsser
Senior Member

since 2001-02-27

Posts 1641
Calif.

3 posted 2001-09-21 09:18 AM

This piece can be used for what ever is going on in someones life.... personal or what has happened to our country... I like it very much...
~Connie~

dgvarner
Member Elite

since 2000-05-13

Posts 3552
High Springs, Florida

4 posted 2001-09-28 12:33 PM

this is a good one..i like the way each sentance seems to be fragmented, broken up into unsolid ground..bits here, bits there...into small grains of sand.....

enjoyed..

hugs, g

~dgvarner/fallen rain~

"all you need is someone you can hold..dont be sad, youre not alone..i will be here for you..." mwsmith

Tennessee Angel
Senior Member

since 2000-06-03

Posts 661
Tennessee

5 posted 2001-09-28 12:36 PM

This poem says many things to me right now. Even though so many dreams have been lost along the way...you can pick up the ones that remain and begin again. Thank you for writing this.

cruz
Member

since 2000-07-18

Posts 282
Dallas,Texas USA

6 posted 2001-09-30 10:57 PM

dreams rule but not as much as your poem. nice job and awesome topic!

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