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Open Poetry #16
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Another Place
| Open Poetry #16 |
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Another Place |
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Corinne Member Ascendant
since 1999-10-28
Posts 5167state of confusion 
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Another Place Another Place summons me, tenderly but without mercy - like a Roy Orbison chorus playing over and again - skipping in my head. This struggle started out - a tiny twinkle of doubt, I didn’t pay it much mind until pyrite colors splayed, laid out like an oceanic bed. Now, I argue my case silently, borders created by this decree, within the confines of many miles, deserted prison, no mirage, China Lake beneath my feet. I’m resigned to my sentence, which I’ll serve without pretense, but resolve forms in small ways, one day I’ll return to my Place amid the waves. © 2001 Corinne Bailey [This message has been edited by Corinne (edited 09-26-2001).] |
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| © Copyright 2001 Corinne - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Duncan Member Ascendant
since 2001-08-07
Posts 5455 |
This struggle started out a tiny twinkle of doubt, I didn’t pay it much mind, until colors splayed in pyrite, laid like an ocean bed. In all honesty, I'm not sure if I'm reading this the way you intended...either way, it reads like something you hate to see end. |
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Midnitesun
since 2001-05-18
Posts 28647Gaia |
Is this a sad reflection on losing a love through a divorce? ("borders created by decree") or am I way off on this one. I was hearing Orbison's "Only the Lonely" in the background. |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
This struggle started out a tiny twinkle of doubt, I didn’t pay it much mind, until colors splayed in pyrite, laid like an ocean bed. Now I argue this case silently, these borders created by decree, on the confines of many miles, have become a deserted prison, China Lake beneath my feet. I’m reconciled to my sentence, but resolve is forming in small ways, =========================== this is deep...and layered.. and very cool..... masterful employ of metaphor and imagery... a "read between the lines" write for sure. very well done poetess C ...as always. jm Well tomorrow holds only mystery |
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Corinne Member Ascendant
since 1999-10-28
Posts 5167state of confusion |
Thank you for commenting, Midnight Sun and Duncan. This is a difficult one to decifer, I didn't realize how difficult until I read your comments. It is about longing to be in another place, but having boundaries imposed by a divorce decree (having to do with children). This didn't bother me so much at first, the boundaries encompass many square miles, but, no matter how I look at it, it is a restriction on where I can live with my children. Thanks, JM - as always, and your comments are deep as well! Cor |
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RMW Senior Member
since 2001-03-21
Posts 1424 |
Corinne....Lovely... and revealing. Bob |
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Cpat Hair
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793 |
yes... I can see after your comments how this could have been written with those thougths in mind...yet in the end..you have created a layered piece that allows the reader to take from it what they will or can.... very nicely done.. |
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Lady In White
since 2001-02-12
Posts 2799USA |
I shan't rid my mind of Orbison tunes now...well done, Corinne.... |
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Sven
since 1999-11-23
Posts 14937East Lansing, MI USA |
a look into the window of the soul. . . great job Corinne. . .  ------------------------------------------------------- To the world, you may only be one person. But to one person, you may be the world. |
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Corinne Member Ascendant
since 1999-10-28
Posts 5167state of confusion |
Thanks, Bob, Captain, LIW and Sven, me thinks I doth protest too much!!! Cor |
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CocoBaci Member Elite
since 2000-05-06
Posts 3043 |
excellent write Corrine, I've always enjoyed reading your poetry and this one no doubt is one of my favorites... Thank you for this read2nite *~coco~* |
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