Winds : A Gloom Sonnet - pipTalk Forums

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Professor Gloom
Member Elite

since 2000-07-23

Posts 3082
of Depression

0 posted 2001-11-09 05:37 AM

Brisk and rushing capturing the light things,
Leaves and paper swirling to the lee brings,
Piles of debris resting for a moment,
Then they’re flying where ever the winds sent.

Can I not cast a thought to you on wind?

Quick carried off left with an inner chill
To gather and forgotten corner fill,
Rags and rubbish topped with paper and leaves,
There’s something deep inside that softly breathes.

Can you not feel a thought to you on wind?

When whistle winds reduce to just a moan,
Deep inside the discarded pile will groan,
Rain falling almost as cold as a snow,
Warmth of thoughts lost on in cold Autumn blow.

Gloom

Kit McCallum

Administrator

Member Laureate

since 2000-04-30

Posts 14774
Ontario, Canada

1 posted 2001-11-09 07:12 AM

"When whistle winds reduce to just a moan,
Deep inside the discarded pile will groan,"

Beautiful Professor! Such a soft and gentle flow to these words, and wonderful imagery. Very much enjoyed this descriptive piece!

Best wishes,
/Kit

Professor Gloom
Member Elite

since 2000-07-23

Posts 3082
of Depression

2 posted 2001-11-09 08:22 AM

Thank you, Kit
Glad you could find a bit of enjoyment
in my Poetry.

Gloom

Mysteria

Member Laureate

since 2001-03-07

Posts 18328
British Columbia, Canada

3 posted 2001-11-09 03:33 PM

Now the softness of this was incredible, and I loved these two lines so much..
"Can I not cast a thought to you on wind?
Can you not feel a thought to you on wind?"
You always make this look so easy, but then that is what good poets do, and you Sir, are a good poet!

~*~ Carpe' Diem ~*~

Mistletoe Angel

Member Empyrean

since 2000-12-17

Posts 32816
Portland, Oregon

4 posted 2001-11-09 04:31 PM

(big hugggsssssss) Oh Aszard, this is so so heartwrenching and sad! (sad sigh) I pray this isn't a current feeling you're having, but if it is, remember you are loved by many, and may those thoughts keep you warm and happy all year round! (sigh) My heart is with you, sweet friend! You have such a beautiful heart, dearest Aszard, thank you for sharing!

May love and light always shine upon you!

Love,
Noah Eaton

Lady In White

Member Elite

since 2001-02-12

Posts 2799
USA

5 posted 2001-11-09 04:35 PM

Yes, you can...

Yes, I did...

well done!

Professor Gloom
Member Elite

since 2000-07-23

Posts 3082
of Depression

6 posted 2001-11-10 06:55 AM

Thank you, Mysteria,
Glad you Liked this,
In a Gloom Sonnet the repeater lines,
the one you quoted are very important
so I’m glad you picked those two as the ones you liked best.

Thank you, Mistletoe Angel,
Glad you enjoyed, but this is my mood
And almost always so, I appreciate your warm thoughts
And high praise.

Thank you, Lady in White,
Always nice when someone can reap the winds.

Gloom

nakdthoughts
Member Laureate

since 2000-10-29

Posts 19200
Between the Lines

7 posted 2001-11-23 08:51 AM

Can I not cast a thought to you on wind?

...I think this happens more than you know..a nice poem Professor

~Wynter ..sorry, but I am trying to catch up on all the poems I couldn't respond to lately of yours..my thoughts have gathered and allowed me some freedom...

"For it was not into my ear you whispered, but into my heart.
It was not my lips you kissed, but my soul."
(J.Garland)

miscellanea
Member Elite

since 2004-06-24

Posts 4060
OH

8 posted 2004-09-11 04:52 PM

I've often wondered if thought and warmth could travel subtly with the wind, leaving a tingly, wind chime feeling upon whom the thought fell.  Apparently, I'm not alone.  You write of it well.

Very nice, as are all the sonnets I'm catching up on.  You overwhelm me, Professor.

           miscellanea

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