Jean `te Returns..........Part1

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SEA

Moderator

Member Seraphic

since 2000-01-18

Posts 22676
with you

0 posted 2001-11-01 10:12 AM

Jean`te Returns

Time came for sun to begin evening fade
chill took invitation, set to creeping
holding night fearful
in shivery keeping

wind danced upon silent cue
with macabre movements of intent
tonight it would not be so easily quelled
power and force….strength unspent

liquid blackness coated the sky
filled not with emptiness, but indignation
tangible, solid in anger, aversion
wanting only complete annihilation

starlight was lost, as was the moon
in covering, controlling, steady path
to eyes watching and those who could not see
visions of sadness, impending wrath

yet one stood defiant in storm
unwilling to be controlled, refusing submission
daring so boldly to display mirth ~
having foreknowledge, that which is written……
~SEA~

* special thank you to Lady, for all her guidance, and patience

[This message has been edited by Sunshine (edited 11-01-2001).]

The Rusty Knight
Member

since 2001-08-29

Posts 414
Texas

1 posted 2001-11-01 10:24 AM

liquid blackness coated the sky
filled not with emptiness, but indignation
tangible, solid in anger, aversion
wanting only complete annihilation

starlight was lost, as was the moon
in covering, controlling, steady path
to eyes watching and those who could not see
visions of sadness, impending wrath

This is the darkest dark I have ever seen. It is easy to paint a picture of something with words, but to paint one of total darkness and emptyness in so few words is impressive.

Dan

Death comes not when we cease to breathe, but when we cease to dream.

Startime
Member Ascendant

since 2000-10-03

Posts 5918
Canada

2 posted 2001-11-01 10:38 AM

BRAVO!!!!BRAVO!!!!Standing proud and defiant against the storm receiving strength in the very stance taken. You paint much here for the eyes that can see within the darkness you weave. BRAVO!!! I love it.

Love I leave with you whether it is in your life now or yet the essense of your dreams.

Sunshine

Administrator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-06-25

Posts 63354
Listening to every heart

3 posted 2001-11-01 10:39 AM

A new series! SEA! This is wonderful! Can't wait to see more!

Interloper

Member Rara Avis

since 2000-11-06

Posts 8369
Deep in the heart

4 posted 2001-11-01 10:43 AM

Wonderful, gal. Just wonderful

Fool, said my Muse to me, look in thy heart and write.

RSWells
Member Elite

since 2001-06-17

Posts 2533

5 posted 2001-11-01 11:33 AM

There's nothing like the light and might of righteous indignation.

"Happy people have no history" - French Proverb

Lady In White

Member Elite

since 2001-02-12

Posts 2799
USA

6 posted 2001-11-01 01:59 PM

SEA, giving you a small bit of assistance was my pleasure....this is going to be a stunning series, and I am anxious to see how you carry it on...

Enchantress
Member Empyrean

since 2001-08-14

Posts 35113
Canada eh.

7 posted 2001-11-01 02:05 PM

Sea~A series!? Oh how wonderful!! I look for ward to the next...this is incredible writing! ~hugs, Nancy~

~Time has cast a spell on you,
So that you won't ever forget me.~

Auguste

Member Elite

since 2000-02-16

Posts 3953
By the sea

8 posted 2001-11-01 02:42 PM

Wonderful, Susan. Your imagery is superb!

(((hugs)))

Michael Auguste~
There is more depth to the heart than the mind can comprehend and it only has boundaries when we choose to fence it in.

Midnitesun

Member Empyrean

since 2001-05-18

Posts 28647
Gaia

9 posted 2001-11-01 02:56 PM

Wow, this is full of incredible imagery! I am waiting for more like this.

Janet Marie
Member Laureate

since 2000-01-22

Posts 18554

10 posted 2001-11-01 03:40 PM

wind danced upon silent cue
with macabre movements of intent
tonight it would not be so easily quelled
power and force….strength unspent

liquid blackness coated the sky
filled not with emptiness, but indignation
tangible, solid in anger, aversion
wanting only complete annihilation

starlight was lost, as was the moon
in covering, controlling, steady path
to eyes watching and those who could not see
visions of sadness, impending wrath
===============================

this is indeed impressive...
and you have chosen the perfect teacher to help you reach for new levels in your poetry.
The imagery and vocabulary in this is wonderful...polished and well done.
Perhaps we will soon be calling you "Lady of the Sea" *L*

This distance has shown how the road remains alone
Now I'm looking in my life ... for a truth that is my own.

Magnus

Member Laureate

since 2001-10-10

Posts 14135
South Carolina, USA

11 posted 2001-11-01 08:03 PM

and from the darkness comes a most brilliant
light. Well done Sue. nice write.

Janet Marie
Member Laureate

since 2000-01-22

Posts 18554

12 posted 2001-11-02 02:49 PM

OK girlie...where is part 2...
dont tease us...someone might think youre a moth

I can be your hero baby ... I will kiss away the pain
I will stand by you forever ... you still take my breath away ...

The Lady of Shallot
Senior Member

since 2001-10-03

Posts 818
USA

13 posted 2001-11-02 02:52 PM

wonderful, looking forward to it!

-befriend yourself and you will never be alone-

SEA

Moderator

Member Seraphic

since 2000-01-18

Posts 22676
with you

14 posted 2001-11-02 02:53 PM

here is the link to part 2 I just posted it today

/pip/Forum51/HTML/002667.html

SmittenKitten
Senior Member

since 2001-06-20

Posts 1131
where the sky and horizon meet

15 posted 2001-11-02 02:54 PM

SEA~ Wow...this is fantastic! Your imagery paints such a dark picture but the reader can feel the light that eminates from the strength and determination instilled as well. Well done poetess!

Hugs,
~Krista

Your beautiful words & creativity allow me to connect with the same in myself.
Thank you for having the courage to share yourself so that I can too

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