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Open Poetry #16
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Your Loss
| Open Poetry #16 |
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Your Loss |
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wornways Member
since 2001-10-18
Posts 204CA, USA |
Your Loss How could you turn your heart from love so grand? A love as hers you will not know again; Your loss is greater than you understand. Her burning love for you would all withstand; Never a love so pure will you attain; How could you turn your heart from love so grand? Unto the end would she have held your hand; Through life with not another ever lain; Your loss is greater than you understand. She would not in her days her love remand; A truer love in life you will not gain; How could you turn your heart from love so grand? No deeper love than hers is in the land; Perdurable, through time would it remain; Your loss is greater than you understand. With broken heart have you left her to stand, And empty left her all alone in pain; How could you turn your heart from love so grand? Your loss is greater than you understand. |
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| © Copyright 2001 Erin A. Thomas - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
this is a very interesting rhyme scheme you have chosen/created...made for delightful cadence. very cool writing... Welcome to Poetry Land wornways... I had a quick look at your webpage... will come back when I have more time, I look forward to hearing some of those recitals...I love poetry read aloud. Nice to have you here with us. jm This distance has shown how the road remains alone |
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Startime Member Ascendant
since 2000-10-03
Posts 5918Canada |
 BRAVO!!!!A MASTERPIECE!!! I love the structure and the whole content of this wonderful poem. BRAVO!!! Love I leave with you whether it is in your life now or yet the essense of your dreams. |
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Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla |
Wornways, It reads like a villanelle and a good one at that. Enjoyed |
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wornways Member
since 2001-10-18
Posts 204CA, USA |
ahh, thank you peoples! yes, this is a villanelle. wrote it for a friend of mine who's fiance dumped her and got married to someone else less than a month later. what a dork. i believe she saw to it he got a copy of the poem.  anyway, thanks again!  |
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Kevin Taylor Member
since 1999-12-23
Posts 185near Vancouver, BC, Canada |
One thing about villanelles, they put the kibosh to run-on lines. And your repeaters are particularly well suited. Thank you! Kevin |
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Nightshade 
since 2001-08-31
Posts 13962just out of reach |
wornways - this a wonderful piece. I thoroughly enjoyed reading and am going back to read again. Chris Life is not measured by breaths you take, but by moments that take your breath away. |
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