Open Poetry #16 |
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Internet Love Can Hurt So Much.... |
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Magnus![]() ![]()
since 2001-10-10
Posts 14135South Carolina, USA ![]() |
This is written for all of the Ladies of Passions and all over who have suffered the pain of false love over the Internet. You deserve so much more....(written by a man as a woman in this) Sitting here, looking at a screen filled with the words of love of another. My heart clutching at each syllable he writes. My mind awhirr. Hoping that these words are true, that I have found the love I desperately want. Please let me find in these words one I love so dear. I have waited countless days for a reply to my last words. My tears have flowed freely, my chin trembling from the silence. What could I have possibly done to deserve such arrogance, such lack of kindness? I have fallen so in love with the words that I read of yours, I sleep on them. Yet, you ignore me, I appear to be only a fantasy. I am not. My heart real, pumps red blood filled with pain. My mind, reeling from rejection, thinks only the saddest thoughts. I am lost, I have no feelings. I only wanted to be loved, to hear someone say they care. I have hoped so, I have dreamed so, yet I have nothing but this screen to comfort me. You, in your insensitive nature, you mislead me, you gave me false hope I find it hard to believe that you ever loved me. I find it hard to believe that you no longer care. My life has suffered through broken relationships, countless times. Men have said so many sweet words which are bitter to the taste. My heart has fallen for each of them, not tasting the sourness. My mind, blocking out the past pain, continues on, dreaming of real love. Once again, I find emptiness, I have been cast aside. Some days I wish I were a man, I wish I could do what you have done to me. Now I again turn to my screen. I write pain and hurt. I am hurt, can’t you feel it? You ignore me by turning me off your screen. Is there another heart you now break? (A fantasy write of Internet love reality) Written for all of the ladies who have suffered through painful moments. Pictures and words often don’t show the truth of the heart. I sometimes feel ashamed to be of the same sex as so many who hurt beautiful ladies who want nothing more than kindness and friendship and love. Love devoted to them because of who they are, not what they are. And, for the record......I am very much married....(32 years).....And I am learning how to be a friend and equal to my wife. She certainly deserves that. You all do. I would like to clarify one thing. I know that this experience happens to both sexes. I just feel a lot of compassion toward the ladies who have experienced this pain. And....by no means do I imply that this is the norm. For I am not an expert on this subject. Just someone who has feelings about it. [This message has been edited by Magnus (edited 10-25-2001).] |
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© Copyright 2001 Barry J. Tackett - All Rights Reserved | |||
Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
Magnus...some sad truths in this, I'm sure..but also, many beautiful friendships begin on the internet and are true and meaningful. I liked your last statement, the best..your wife is lucky. |
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catalinamoon![]()
since 2000-06-03
Posts 9543The Shores of Alone |
Thank you for this, Magnus. Even though I did not meet my man on the internet, we did spend some time together that way, and I know the pain of waiting for a reply for such a long time. You do understand women well, and I'm glad there is a lady getting to be loved the right way. And thanks for your wonderful note on my poem. I would've emailed, but yours is not listed. Thanks again Sandra |
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Magnus![]() ![]()
since 2001-10-10
Posts 14135South Carolina, USA |
Martie, by no means do I feel all Internet relationships are false....By Far.... It is just so hard to know the truth of a heart thru wires when you cannot see their eyes, their face. Then, you can often see the reality of the person, begin to understand the integrity of their heart. Thank you for your comments. No, I am the lucky one. |
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Magnus![]() ![]()
since 2001-10-10
Posts 14135South Carolina, USA |
Sandra, I did this for you and all of the other ladies who have experienced the hard- ship. My heart goes to you. You deserve so much more kindness. for the record: your poem inspired this write. it may be just poetry, very very well done.... Hopefully you have never experienced this. I have opened my email addy in my profile to you. [This message has been edited by Magnus (edited 10-25-2001).] |
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Enchantress Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113Canada eh. |
Magnus, this is just me, Nancy, talking now...I would like to believe that most of the women out here, are well loved, in love, about to be loved, and otherwise 'for the most part' quite content and happy. If a writer, either male or female can write of loneliness and dispair while he/she is happy, and the reader believes what they have read to be so, then is this not the sign of a good writer? Much like the 'misdirection' a magician uses? Very good write, by the way. ~Nancy~ ~Time has cast a spell on you, |
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Magnus![]() ![]()
since 2001-10-10
Posts 14135South Carolina, USA |
Nancy.....I certainly agree with you... I guess I must be a heck of a writer when I write about lost love and things like that. Because I too am happy with my relationship. There are some who have experienced this pain.....My heart goes to them... |
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The Lady of Shallot Senior Member
since 2001-10-03
Posts 818USA |
Magnus, right now, sitting here I feel you are a close friend, can I say that? or you have reached into a screen and pulled out every emotion from my heart tonight. Thank you is not enough....but thank you for this. It's empathy.....in glorious verse. -befriend yourself and you will never be alone- [This message has been edited by The Lady of Shallot (edited 10-25-2001).] |
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Wanda Member
since 2001-10-23
Posts 461 |
Magnus; I really appreciate what you have written here. There is so much truth in this. You are right; people can write some beautiful words. Yet, behind the words, you cannot see the face or the heart of the person. It is always best to be on guard. But, I have met some wonderful people on the internet too. So, one must use some judgment, right??? Enjoyed the read. Wanda |
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Magnus![]() ![]()
since 2001-10-10
Posts 14135South Carolina, USA |
Lady of S....you are quite welcome...Yes, empathy is the word. Most men have to work very hard to have a lot of empathy. I was not born with it. I had to learn it hard myself. I was not a saint. I am learning...even today. |
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Magnus![]() ![]()
since 2001-10-10
Posts 14135South Carolina, USA |
Yes, I agree wholeheartedly Wanda. We have to use judgement. I still feel there is nothing better than being able to see a person's eyes and their voice. Both say a lot. |
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Sven![]() ![]()
since 1999-11-23
Posts 14937East Lansing, MI USA |
words only show so much. . . well written my friend. . . you speak for and to many. . . ----------------------------------------------------- To the world, you may only be one person. But to one person, you may be the world. |
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Magnus![]() ![]()
since 2001-10-10
Posts 14135South Carolina, USA |
Thanx Sven....I was deeply touched by a poem this evening. I wanted to write these feelings. I hope to offend no one. |
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DawnG![]() ![]()
since 2000-06-23
Posts 1494United States |
Magnus, This is one powerful poem. It hit me really deeply. So many people have no clue that when a lady is hurting from being alone how deeply a word, or a hug can touch a heart. Just wish more would learn to think deeply before they go playing with hearts and souls on the internet. Just because they are words on a screen doesn't mean that there isn't a human being on the receiving end. A human being with a heart easily broken. Thank you for this poem. Dawn |
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Magnus![]() ![]()
since 2001-10-10
Posts 14135South Carolina, USA |
You have perfectly said exactly what I am trying to say. Thank you. |
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doreen peri Member Elite
since 1999-05-25
Posts 3812Virginia |
unfortunately, the internet is a media which holds people in anonymity, and there are those who take advantage of that by projecting themselves as something they are not and with words which represent themselves as something other than who they are.... in order to garner attention, affection, whatever.....sexual innuendos? hope? i don't know... i would say, though, that the majority of people on the internet who flirt or engage in relationships are honest and the relationships, real and true... true, the internet can be a more dangerous place to meet someone than in "real" life, because of that anonymity but i believe that people who want to take advantage of someone, will so so whether on the internet or not.... i also believe that it is just as easy to discern the honesty and sincerity of a person on the internet as it is meeting them face to face. words have power, true. but seeing through lies isn't easy even in "real" life. I put that in quotes because internet life is real, as well. I am real. You are real. We are all real. I think, honestly, that meeting people on the internet may be a better way to meet them than most others. This, because you get to know a person from the inside out first. anyway, i'm rambling, but that's just me in case you didn't know... lol.... i thought your poem was heartfelt, sincere, and that you have presented a scenario that occurs often in this media....... but it also occurs often meeting people face to face... such is life... i wrote a poem several years ago called "nothing, shaved to a fine point"... i'll post it in response to this... if ya don't mind! hehe.... people are people. Here, there and everywhere. It's the ability to distinguish between the value and the trash that makes a difference, whether staring into a screen reading words or hearing them spoken from a man sitting next to you on the couch, candles burning, romantic music playing.... and all that.... the most important thing is to believe in Love and let the hurts, no matter where they came from, teach you something...... i, too, care deeply about all who have been hurt on the net or in person ... but hey.... life is life and the world is changing.. seems like yesterday it was sept 10th geesh.... again... thanks for posting this and i'm gonna post mine written in 1990 way before i ever had a computer..... *grin |
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Magnus![]() ![]()
since 2001-10-10
Posts 14135South Carolina, USA |
wow..... Doreen, I agree 10,000 percent with you. I guess that the internet has shown me things that I am sensitive to. Thus the thought of what has/can happen on the Inet. The internet is a neat thing....A lot of friendships are built thru it. I have several friendships as a result of it. It has put my wife and I back in touch with most of our family. Somethng we never seemed to be able to do before. I have grown creatively by quantum leaps because of the internet and those who I share poetry with. That I truly appreciate. So....it all has it's goods and it's bads, so to speak. (without rambling on and on.) I knew this would stir thoughts. I would not have written it had I not felt compelled by FEELINGS to do so. Just as you are responding. I appreciate all you have said. Thank you. May we all learn from this as well as what life has taught us. Thank You, Magnus |
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Enchantress Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113Canada eh. |
Magnus, Just to clear something up. I thought when I first read this and responded, that you were referring only to the men and women of Passions. I do see a lot of, I hope, fun and harmless flirting going on, nothing wrong with that. Now, after reading once again what you have written, and also seeing the responses I do have to agree that we must be careful on the Internet, especially in chat rooms etc. as some people can be taken in by 'cons.' This is especially true of vulnerable lonely people, both male and female. Now I understand where you are coming from. Just wanted to clarify that. My heart does go out to these individuals as well. We all should be alert to these situations. Okay...nuff said by Nancy. LOL...perhaps this should have been posted for discussion. I just did not want anyone thinking I was a cold hearted person, which could not be further from the truth. Thanks again for this Magnus. Sincerely, NancyLee. |
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Suetang Member Ascendant
since 2001-03-07
Posts 5187Melbourne, Australia |
Magnus How well I can relate to all you said in this wonderful piece of writing. I had a friend I poured my heart and soul out to only to be disregarded like a used old piece of rag......I felt I was worth more than that and this experience has made me so much more aware. People seem to think that just because they can't see you physically that you don't get hurt but I can tell you that you can get very hurt and your self confidence suffers greatly. Take care....Sue Suetang |
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RosePetal![]() ![]()
since 2001-08-26
Posts 2985South Florida |
I thank you for this Magnus. It reminds me of the man I met on AOL a few years back when I first bought my computer. I was amazed by him, we clicked so well, and even lived in the same city (so he said) Afer months of chatting and e mails back and forth one day I decided I wanted to meet him. He agreed to it and then when it came down to it he e mailed me and told me never to talk to him again and that I was a desperate loser. My heart just sank, I was upset as well as angry with him. A year later I get an e mail from him apologizing but I never forgave him because I could never trust him again. Plus I have someone now, so it all worked out for the best. |
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Startime Member Ascendant
since 2000-10-03
Posts 5918Canada |
*sigh* From my own experiences I can say that you have managed to write this perfectly. How is it we are just seen as words on a screen to have a little fun with and give entertainment to someone who just adds us as another notch to his belt? I know it has made me pretty skiddish and afraid to give my heart to anyone of flesh or not. Thank you, so much, Magnus, for having heart enough to truly understand the suffering that goes on. *hugs* Love I leave with you whether it is in your life now or yet the essense of your dreams. |
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Magnus![]() ![]()
since 2001-10-10
Posts 14135South Carolina, USA |
Nancy Lee.... I am happy that we both are on the same wavelength now....NO, I certainly would never consider you to be anything other than very genuine and caring. Your poetry expresses that too well. Thanx bunches for understanding. |
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Magnus![]() ![]()
since 2001-10-10
Posts 14135South Carolina, USA |
Sue...thanx much for the comments. I hope very sincerely that you never experience the false love of anyone again. You, and all people are individuals who so much deserve respect and kindness. Feeling used hurts very deeply. |
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Magnus![]() ![]()
since 2001-10-10
Posts 14135South Carolina, USA |
RosePetal. I am happy that your experience taught you a lot. Yes, this happens too easily. I am pleased that you have grown from your experience. Thanx much for your warm words. Best to you. |
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Magnus![]() ![]()
since 2001-10-10
Posts 14135South Carolina, USA |
Karen, I am pleased with myself that I have given something to each of you. I wish you and all of the ladies here at Passions and throughout the world the best of all in your lives. We grow from our mistakes. And hopefully we learn compassion and empathy toward those we influence through our thoughts. |
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suthern![]() ![]()
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723Louisiana |
You just need to remove that first word from the title, Magnus... for whether you meet on the net or at church, giving your heart and then learning you're nothing more than the flavor of the month is devastating. *S* But you're right... the net is a haven for those who wish to deceive. Fortunately, it's also a gathering place for some of this world's finest. *S* I like this very much... and like the compassion you have for another's pain even more. *S* |
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Magnus![]() ![]()
since 2001-10-10
Posts 14135South Carolina, USA |
Suthern, I must agree that I could have taken the word Internet off of the title and it would have been all encompassing. Yes, Love can hurt very deeply, particularly when only one feels true love. The pain of feeling used is great. No one deserves this, whether on the internet or in life. We all want sincerity and kindness... Unfortunately there are some who don't know what that is. Thanx for your comments. |
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LngJhnAg Member Elite
since 1999-07-23
Posts 3508Boot+Kitty=Poetry in motion |
Magnus - Whatever you do next, don't write a similar poem about kitty kickers - ya hear? |
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The Lady of Shallot Senior Member
since 2001-10-03
Posts 818USA |
I think you're very sensitive and very kind to bring this around for everyone to read..thank you again! -befriend yourself and you will never be alone- |
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Magnus![]() ![]()
since 2001-10-10
Posts 14135South Carolina, USA |
No problem Long John....I don't even know what a kitty kicker is.... |
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Magnus![]() ![]()
since 2001-10-10
Posts 14135South Carolina, USA |
Lady of S....as always, you are quite welcome. |
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A Whisper's Caress Senior Member
since 2000-11-03
Posts 791on the horizon of a fairytale |
Magnus, a very warm hug to you for this gift. It is true there are always two sides to a coin, but this lady's soul has drowned in the shallows waters of a man's heart. Look into the eyes of a man and |
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Robert A Member
since 2001-10-29
Posts 174 |
don't even get me going on THIS subject, but the other person was right, love is love no matter where you find it...and if it's gonna flop, it's gonna flop. Good topic. I mean poem |
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Magnus![]() ![]()
since 2001-10-10
Posts 14135South Carolina, USA |
Whispers Caress, you are welcome for this. I hope that all goes well for you. thank you for your response. |
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Magnus![]() ![]()
since 2001-10-10
Posts 14135South Carolina, USA |
Robert A. yes there are two sides to every coin...most definitely....there are men who are led down paths of deception as well as women who are. It still hurts when one loves deeply and the other does not....Up close and personal works so well compared to written words... Thank you for your reply. |
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