I Don’t Know

I don’t know what crossed my mind
When my hand reached for the phone
And began to dial those familiar numbers.
I don’t know what I expected you to say.
Months gone by since I’ve heard your voice.
I sat still, not breathing as I heard the rings.
Waiting with apprehension to hear your voice
I didn’t know what I was going to say
Once I heard you lift the phone to your ear.
Panic surges…I shouldn’t have called you.
No time left to change my mind as I hear
Your sweet voice sounding the same as always
Slicing into my every nerve like a sharp dagger
Whose blade should have long since gone dull
I don’t remember my words that came tumbling
But I remember the sound of your voice.
So distant as if I was some random person
That your brain could no longer place
That you mind couldn’t remember.
The searing hot blade of the dagger twists
As you tell me you can’t talk now, you’re busy
I remember when I was the one that made you busy
The lethal dagger with the jagged edges
Cutting deeper than I ever thought it could again.
Your voice ringing in my ears.. you can call anytime….
I don’t know what I was thinking when I hung up.
The humiliation and hurt flowing through my heart.
My soul shedding those almost forgotten bitter tears.
I don’t remember the all thoughts that swam
Through my aching and numb mind that night
I only remember the salty tears of regret.
As tranquility of sleep carried me far away
Into the safety and shelter of temporary escape.




This is a kinda a throw back... I used to do alot of free form rambling poetry.... I suppose the mood struck me to return to that for a moment.. I've been lost in memories tonight... this is from one of them.

Don't marry for money...  You can borrow it cheaper!

If she who dies with the most toys wins, then can I have some toy boys please?

Michael Auguste~
There is more depth to the heart than the mind can comprehend and it only has boundaries when we choose to fence it in.