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Open Poetry #16
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Just The Three Of Me
| Open Poetry #16 |
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Just The Three Of Me |
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Mysteria 
since 2001-03-07
Posts 18328British Columbia, Canada 
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~*~ Just The Three Of Me ~*~ I sit here again like a small child, Awakened by nightmares of the past. It feels like there are three of me, Each one more frightened than the last. I feel so sorry for myself that I weep. Poor little girl who wants to hide, so frightened of the outside world, spending so much time inside. Then there’s the social butterfly, No one would ever even know, All the sorrow and heartache, She carries in a heart full of woe. And lastly there’s the caring soul, That everyone gets to see, and no one would suspect at all, that the other two are really me. I wonder how do you forgive yourself? even if you had no hand in evil done? How do you gain back your dignity? How is stolen innocence undone? It’s futile to block out searing pain, In shadows of darkness, it creeps in again. Alone and cowering in residual fright, Past abuse and fear is hard to contain. Constant denominator written in stone, by the hand of the devil, my fate unknown. I worry about how I will be judged for this, I’ve been there before; it's just wearing thin. Heartache seems to be my constant friend, but for one release ~ my comforting pen. Feelings flow like water from my mind, I pen of the loneliness in my world once again. Strong and resilient, I’ll see it through, and be a better woman when I finally do. The devil won this marker, I’m alone in this, but he’ll never drag me down into his abyss. I belong in Heaven, for I know I am good, I am blameless in all this pain. I know in time I will forgive myself, feel confidence and self-respect again. I get tired of worrying, is it too late? It gets so lonely here as I sit and wait. I look after me and I do that job well, for long ago I told the Devil to go to Hell! ~* Just a little poem *~ ~*~ art by Johanna ~ www.johannas-art.com/ music by Bruce DeBour ~ www.geocities.com/Vienna/7189 Try giving your smile to someone who does not have one, and I bet you'll find another. ~* Mysteria *~ [This message has been edited by Mysteria (edited 10-22-2001).] |
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| © Copyright 2001 Mysteria 1997 - All Rights Reserved | |||
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inot2B Member Elite
since 2000-09-18
Posts 2205Arkansas |
As I read the words it was like looking into myself. You illustrated the feelings so well. |
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Kit McCallum
Administrator
Member Laureate
since 2000-04-30
Posts 14774Ontario, Canada |
"I belong in Heaven, for I know I am good, I am blameless in all this pain. I know in time I will forgive myself, feel confidence and self-respect again." This a powerful, powerful piece Sharon. You've captured the heartache and pain that is carried by so many individuals, young and old alike. I love the verse above the best, as it shows an inspiration and strength that still dwells within all. Whatever the past may hold, the abused are blameless ... and do need to forgive themselves. Very much enjoyed my friend.  Best wishes and hugs, /Kit |
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Enchantress Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113Canada eh. |
Heartache seems to be my constant friend, but for one release ~ my comforting pen. Feelings flow like water from my mind, I pen of the loneliness in my world once again. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Sharon! This one I can really relate to...you have no idea how much. LOVE the poem AND this picture! Very well done my friend. ~hugs, Nancy~ ~Time has cast a spell on you, |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
Sharon...once again, you carefully put pen to paper and share your heart, which in turn, speaks to many.... Passions is very very glad to have you... |
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MyEnchanted_Melody Senior Member
since 2001-05-30
Posts 1106across the land of dreams. In your heart, I'd always be. |
I sit here again like a small child, Awakened by nightmares of the past. It feels like there are three of me, Each one more frightened than the last. I feel so sorry for myself that I weep. Poor little girl who wants to hide, so frightened of the outside world, spending so much time inside. ------------------------ Dearest Lady.....your voice as always speaks of many of us..... You have expressed it all so well.....and I'm most thankful for saying it on behalf of many... Thank you ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ |
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Flutterwings Member
since 2001-07-10
Posts 288Maine |
Sharon, this may be *just a little poem*.. but, my dear this is packed with so much inner conflict and pain. You have a way of reaching way down within my aching heart and making my eyes glisten with saline love for that inner child who cries out for love and understanding. As you forgive a friend that you love and care for... this is how you forgive yourself... You reach within and embrace that child whose heart is breaking for fear of rejection and mis-understanding. You tell her you love her and that it's ok to be human... and that whatever happened you love her with all of your heart... then she will start healing and she will start smiling and her heart with stop hurting. Another solemn well penned read. Here is a ((((((((hug)))))))) for all three of you. Love and peace Maggie ((~.~)) |
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catalinamoon
since 2000-06-03
Posts 9543The Shores of Alone |
Very touching story, and I hope you don't feel this sadness inside you, but if so, I know that your strength will alwyas pull you through it. Very strong poem, take care. Sandra |
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Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla |
Sharon, You have painted a picture that will hang in the minds of all who read it. Well done. *L* |
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The Lady of Shallot Senior Member
since 2001-10-03
Posts 818USA |
Sharon, I could write all evening and never begin to tell you what this poem means to me. (but then my pork chops would burn) I'm not laughing, I'm crying, because it is too close to home. Thank you for writing something so vivid, so real and so unfortunately, true in many cases. Yes, sometimes we feel as if there are parts of us, each one helping the other maybe, people don't know, they don't realize that this does happen. The title, the poem, the entire message seared right through me, but in a good way you know? and yes, there is a heaven and yes, there is innocence and yes there is hope and comfort and even forgiveness when you feel you need it, forgiving and knowing that bad things happen and they aren't your fault, but you have to live with the aftermath...oh, emotional here, this poem moved me greatly. But there is peace to be found and I'm glad I read this. glad I read it, thank you and God bestow a special blessing on you for this line in particular: "but for one release ~ my comforting pen." I'm so glad you are here! Much love from me to you! -befriend yourself and you will never be alone- [This message has been edited by The Lady of Shallot (edited 10-22-2001).] |
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Mysteria
since 2001-03-07
Posts 18328British Columbia, Canada |
I want to thank all of you for your very supportive messages on this poem. I found a piece of art by Corey Wolfe that spoke to me and had to write about it (however, Corey Wolfe obviously doesn't share as well as we do LOL) for the picture keeps hiding even though I saved it to another site, so I had to change it to this one. No matter, I wrote this for all who suffer the burden of carrying around past abuse in any form, for it never goes away until you release it, then you are free. Thank you all again for your comments on this poem. |
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Martha Cowan Member
since 2001-03-08
Posts 240Groves, Texas |
Sharon...I know it's going to come as a shocker, but I'm in tears again. My heart echoes in relation with so many emotions you have expressed within these deeply moving verses. Victims at the hands of life's, sometimes, unmerciful circumstances, we must view the reflection of the changes that it all brought within us as a contributing factor to all that we have become. The strength that we have discovered so deep within us to overcome...the compassion to understand the pain of others...the love and respect of beauty versus the darkness far too prevalent in this journey of life. And when others see within us a reflection of beauty...healing and surviving the pain of life, it becomes an example for them to focus upon in their own journey. So, smile with pride, and soar elegantly upon those velvet butterfly wings of perserverance...Heaven above has kissed them with blessings and annointed them with the gift of eternal flight... Hugs and much love to you, always, ~*~dawnie~*~ |
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Mysteria
since 2001-03-07
Posts 18328British Columbia, Canada |
Dawnie, my buddy, you definitely need to write a book (save all your comments) and they could be put into an inspiration book on life AND I am serious here too! You are right of course, those survivors are living examples to those struggling and if they would only take the time to help someone along the path to accepting themselves again, they will have done one good thing in their life time. Hugs, hugs and more hugs |
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Mistletoe Angel
since 2000-12-17
Posts 32816Portland, Oregon |
 (big hugggssssss) Oh Sharon, my heart cries out to all the sorrow you've felt throughout your life and my heart cries out to you, though also cries of joy because I'm so proud of you, for you've become the loving woman you are to us all! (smiles) Pain may have hurt you before, but in the end, your loving heart is what wins! (sigh) We all love you so much, sweet Mysteria! (sigh) Wonderful poem, dearest friend! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Sharon, thank you for sharing! May love and light always shine upon you! Love, Noah Eaton |
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Tracey Member Elite
since 2001-08-29
Posts 2808where insanity meets breeding |
This is a wonderful piece (but yours always are). I'm sure many recognize themselves in some of these lines (the comments above would attest to this), I recognize a few myself. You have a way of touching souls with your writing. And it is a great gift to have. If she who dies with the most toys wins, then can I have some toy boys please? |
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Mysteria
since 2001-03-07
Posts 18328British Columbia, Canada |
Mistletoe Angel ~ Thank you for your very kind words however, this is just a "poem" that I wrote from life. I see a picture and it speaks to me and I write about it hoping the message reaches someone, but it is not about me or my life at all. I am glad the message comes across that clear that it depicts the victim though - thank you. Tracy ~ I am glad you think it may reach some for that is my only goal, thank you for your wonderfully sweet words. |
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SmartChick Member Rara Avis
since 2001-09-23
Posts 7081On A Journey To The Unknown |
This is a wonder write. And very touching. It really hit home. |
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Mysteria
since 2001-03-07
Posts 18328British Columbia, Canada |
Smart Chick ~ I do thank you for always stopping by to read what I write, I appreciate it so much. |
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Larry C
since 2001-09-10
Posts 10286United States |
Mysteria, You know if you were a social worker you'd get paid for all that understanding! I know as I've worked with many. Wow! Powerfully written and hopefully empowering to those in need. Thanks. Sin isn't fair, but God got even, grace isn't fair either. larry c |
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The Lady of Shallot Senior Member
since 2001-10-03
Posts 818USA |
This is for you, for the beauty of your spirit, the care and love in your words and the comfort this particular poem brought to me at a time when I was desperately empty. Thank you.  -befriend yourself and you will never be alone- |
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Startime Member Ascendant
since 2000-10-03
Posts 5918Canada |
Your visions never fail to reach out and touch those who need it just at the right time. I am glad your muse speaks to you when you see a picture. This poem was like looking into the mirror for me and had me in tears from the beginning. Many of the tears that flowed were healing in my soul. Thank you, dear one...thank you, so much. Love I leave with you whether it is in your life now or yet the essense of your dreams. |
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Mysteria
since 2001-03-07
Posts 18328British Columbia, Canada |
Larry C ~ You know I don't think I could ever take money for sharing my heart, that is always free. My understanding comes from vast experience that I share willingly, as I too have worked with many a social worker in my day. I am so glad you enjoyed this. Lady of Shallot ~ How very lovely, thank you for the seal of approval, and if I helped that is what poetry is all about, making one feel isn't it? Startime ~ You are not alone, remember that, and there are millions like you, the trick is putting it where it belongs now, and moving on. Thanks you once again. |
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suthern
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723Louisiana |
I wonder how do you forgive yourself? even if you had no hand in evil done? How do you gain back your dignity? How is stolen innocence undone? It’s futile to block out searing pain, In shadows of darkness, it creeps in again. How, indeed... Your "little poem" asks the questions of many hearts. *S* Well done, Mysteria. |
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Mysteria
since 2001-03-07
Posts 18328British Columbia, Canada |
Suthern - thank you and yes it does asks questions of hearts, and only in the questions do you find the answers of peace. ~*~ Carpe' Diem ~*~ |
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