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Open Poetry #15
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A Message To E.T. ( Exasperating Telemarketers )
| Open Poetry #15 |
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A Message To E.T. ( Exasperating Telemarketers ) |
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Dr.Moose1 Member Elite
since 1999-09-05
Posts 3448Bewilderment , USA |
The phone is mine enemy , wastrel of time ! Yea , as of this writing it's evil bell chimes ! A clarion call which bodes nothing of good , has sought to do battle with number 2 wood . Fool-hardy usurper your braying means naught . I summon a saying that hist'ry has taught , " I'll not ask of bells why they toll , nor for who ". That scores one for me and leaves zero for you ! Your claxon sound pierces the stillness again , It's shrillness a deafening blow without end . I rally my forces and say " Get thee hence , you've nothing to say which is worth the expence !" Re-coiling your cord now hangs limp by your side . Your number is up , you've got nowhere to hide . To marketers all I say " Don't mess with me , 'cause Dr. Moose has installed caller I.D. |
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| © Copyright 2001 William E.Kleist - All Rights Reserved | |||
Lady In White
since 2001-02-12
Posts 2799USA |
All Righty! That's telling 'em Doc! |
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VAS Member Rara Avis
since 2000-11-16
Posts 7450Oregon |
FANTASTICALLY SAID!!! I wrote one of these recently, can't think of the title. I posted it at PIP though I think it's likely in 14. Found it: Virginia Salter Your call’s important to me leave a message at the beep Your call’s important to me unless you’re some kind of creep. There’s another kind for which I hold disdain Toward telemarketers I really must complain. Ev’ry one needs to make a livin’ I know that is for sure the one that I make I’ll not be likely givin’ to those people that sell plastic line to line or patch up windshields if your’snot doing fine. There are some others who love their fellow man and give a call to plead “Please give us what you can.” They’re even kind enough to suggest a starting point but on the umpteenth call I get a bit bent outta joint. You see, I’m thinkin’ it’s an annual campaign but I tell you brother the years go by like rain. So when someone calls I’m more and more prone to say if they pronounce my name all wrong... “There’s no one here by that name, okay!” Other times, Dear, they ask me for my ex that really thrills me, I tell you to no end, for his existence, I do not need defend. I send them on their merry way and have a chuckle with which to start my day. heh heh heh © July 10, 2001 Oh, I don't have caller i.d. Last time I checked they didn't have it in our area, but they may now. |
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rwood Member Elite
since 2000-02-29
Posts 3793Tennessee |
It's bad when you spend $7.00 on caller ID, $3.00 on anonymous phone block, and somehow they still get through. $120.. a year just to have some peace. They should ban telemarketing. I enjoyed your verse. Sincerely, Rwood |
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Denise
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-08-22
Posts 22648 |
ROTFL  Clever, delightful piece, Doc! Caller ID is fabulous, isn't it? |
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Elizabeth Santos Member Rara Avis
since 1999-11-08
Posts 9269Pennsylvania |
I especially am fascinated with the computer marketers which take minutes to answer, giving you time to hang up. Also the ones who assume I speak Spanish, and when they realize I don't , they get angry at ME. Then I say in Spanish, "You're the one who called, and I'm the one who's mad" Then there are the oneas who ask for M. Santos. When I ask which M. Santos they want, they don't know. So I say, if you don't know who you're calling, what are you doing on the phone, But usually I just hang up I loved your poem Liz |
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Dr.Moose1 Member Elite
since 1999-09-05
Posts 3448Bewilderment , USA |
Lady in White , Thank you . One of my pet peeves . Doc VAS , Thanks . Got a chuckle or two out of yours also . I'm surprised we don't see more people writing about this . Doc rwood , Thanks . Gotta agree with you , seems like all the time we're paying more for something we're not getting ! Doc Elizabeth , Thank you . And ditto . Glad you enjoyed . Doc |
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