Open Poetry #15 |
Revealing |
Cpat Hair
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793 |
Alone at last, buttons slip through eyelets to let drop the days garments. Puddled on the floor, at feet now bare, they look so much less like armor… So much more like shimmering robes worn to keep out the cold of others heat. Flesh and emotions bared for all to see, wanting the caress of just another who thinks like me... |
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© Copyright 2001 Cpat Hair - All Rights Reserved | |||
WhiteDragon Member
since 2001-07-07
Posts 70O-town, Fl |
Wow, powerful words there. I know the exact feeling. Thanks Jeremy |
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Lady In White
since 2001-02-12
Posts 2799USA |
What don't I like about this...the imagery is soft, the feeling is tender, the mood is enchanting... a reader of minds.... yes, a keeper.... |
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Cpat Hair
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793 |
White Dragon... thanks for the comment! Lady.. you are too kind |
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VAS Member Rara Avis
since 2000-11-16
Posts 7450Oregon |
extremely vivid and quiet |
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Cpat Hair
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793 |
thanks VAS |
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MARK V SHELDON Member Elite
since 2001-06-21
Posts 3015In a corporeal internship... |
Damn it, you are good with imagery and phrasing in the smallest of spaces! :-] I love the lines: buttons slip through eyelets to let drop the days garments. That is simply saturated with mental imagery! And the last 3 lines really sieze my attention and empathy. Keep it up, Ron -- you're a great poet with a distinct signature-style! -MVS "If you think you know it all, you have a lot to learn." |
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Cpat Hair
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793 |
Again I thank you Mark... you are far too kind in your words..but I enjoyed reading them ( chuckling) It for me is always the essence I seek... how to distill it to a minimum without becoming so abstract that it means nothing... feels good to know someone else might see that I was in some way successful... THANKS!!!! |
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RMW Senior Member
since 2001-03-21
Posts 1424 |
Cpat .... what all those above said. Well done. Bob |
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Cpat Hair
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793 |
Thanks Bob... coming from you it means a great deal.. |
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Nate Dogg Senior Member
since 1999-11-15
Posts 1658Georgia, Fulton |
Powerful writing...brilliant work!! Nathan |
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Interloper
since 2000-11-06
Posts 8369Deep in the heart |
I refuse to caress you. And, now that I think about it, I don't even know if I think as you do. Come to think of it I don't want to think at all ... except I think I like what you write. I love ya man ... got another Bud |
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Cpat Hair
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793 |
always a bud... unless you are one of them fool lizards trying to fool me into thinking you are a frog... hmmm... might make you a horney toad.... ( laughing) Thanks for the comment Interloper |
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Lady In White
since 2001-02-12
Posts 2799USA |
This has been at the bottom of the clothes pile long enough... it needs an airing out.... |
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walker Member Elite
since 2001-02-11
Posts 2240Florida |
Glad I caught it this time, I love it! |
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shadow974 Senior Member
since 2001-06-21
Posts 636Michigan |
Cpat Hair this is an excellent poem. Hey, I've said that before. You realy are a excellent poet. Do not fear going forward slowly, |
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Kit McCallum
Administrator
Member Laureate
since 2000-04-30
Posts 14774Ontario, Canada |
Excellent CPat ... wonderfully descriptive! I could almost feel the fabric give way baring the soul beneath, beautifully done ... I really enjoyed this! Best wishes, /Kit |
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Dark Angel Member Patricius
since 1999-08-04
Posts 10095 |
Very revealing! I liked Maree. You gave me innocence, |
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Martini Member
since 2000-07-11
Posts 308Toronto, Ontario, Canada |
Cpat great write, its is a feeling most have felt I do believe. Excellent peice I thoroughly enjoyed. |
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