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Open Poetry #15
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Keeping up with Shadows
| Open Poetry #15 |
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Keeping up with Shadows |
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rwood Member Elite
since 2000-02-29
Posts 3793Tennessee 
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She is round in the belly again. Everyone gathers today in shower. Why is it that we are supposed to be happy For inside, I'm sad. Am I cold hearted? Two already here begging for attention. Unoticed they grow stunted. Invisible. I do not understand why! I weep in silent. For I can do nothing but hug them real. I felt responsible for the first one. Now, big As I am tall. She is wistfull, and lonely. I cry. For her daddy was my buddy. I never thought he'd Sleep with my Blood. He was just a shadow. I knew he was Eddie Haskel. But She was Gidget! He hid away in disabled fatherhood. Imagine that. Even if I searched out his disgrace, She loved him. I was only casting light to enhance, the betrayal. Today I give to her diapers. A bib, a sleeper. Wishing I could box up strength and love! I would wrap the box tightly. Using rolls of tape So that she'd know the ties that bind us. Strong! As I have sat back and tried to fade in darkness. I have miserably failed. I have only given her Longing. To wander aimlessly along, in life. As she always felt she walked in my shadow. If she only knew how I would bring her the sun. If it would brighten her life somehow. If she only knew how I wish it were the other Way around. I was so foolish and self-centered. How hard she tried to hold my hand, escaping Her always. Today I will step forward. God help us both. My hiding place will be gone And her eyes will hurt in the new light. Together, we can shine in the stronghold of sisterly love. |
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| © Copyright 2001 Regina Wood - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Rex Allen McCoy Member Elite
since 2000-01-30
Posts 2863Sippin a Timmy's in London |
excellent thoughts ... and a good step to the future  nicely said |
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catalinamoon
since 2000-06-03
Posts 9543The Shores of Alone |
Wow, this is how I felt at my daughters third baby shower, when there were already two who could not be adequately cared for. Its a very hard thing. And this sounds even more complex. Very good write, R. Sandra |
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VAS Member Rara Avis
since 2000-11-16
Posts 7450Oregon |
such a powerful lot of emotions here, and some that should be let go...and it seems you've tried or are trying, keep seeking...I'm positive it's an important goal for you and your sister don't quite understand why you feel responsible for the first, but think probably I'm not supposed to, yet, for you're not ready for that, I'm certain the time will come for you, though prayers |
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rwood Member Elite
since 2000-02-29
Posts 3793Tennessee |
Rex: Thank you dear Sir. I appreciate you reading. Catalinamoon: Yes, it is hard. Very complex, and heavy for this forum. But I wanted to show that I am willing to go forward even still. I hope all is well with your little ones. Thank you Vas: Thank you for your prayers. We both need them. I feel guilty, because I brought him around. It was me that trusted him first. She just followed suit. I felt I allowed her to get hurt. Course, I'm the big Sis. It's the way we feel sometimes. Yes, I will try harder than ever, to show her I can't change what has happened, but I can be her Sis. Thank you all so much for reading. This piece was so heavy. A big load for me. The release helped so much. Sincerely, Regina |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
Blood is thick in this one. Well done, Regina... |
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Cpat Hair
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793 |
now this..I can relate to on several levels..and find it so well told..I felt you were writing about someone in my family... very nicely done... and the message... well one that needs to be told... |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
As I have sat back and tried to fade in darkness. I have miserably failed. I have only given her Longing. To wander aimlessly along, in life. As she always felt she walked in my shadow. If she only knew how I would bring her the sun. If it would brighten her life somehow. If she only knew how I wish it were the other Way around. I was so foolish and self-centered. How hard she tried to hold my hand, escaping Her always. Today I will step forward. God help us both. My hiding place will be gone And her eyes will hurt in the new light. Together, we can shine in the stronghold of sisterly love. ========================= this is excellent...powerful, intense purge of honesty, intention and emotion. very well written and expressed Regina... shes lucky to have you...good luck to you both in this time of healing and new beginings. jm Feels like Im dancin with truth and wisdom |
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rwood Member Elite
since 2000-02-29
Posts 3793Tennessee |
Sunshine: I'm so glad you read it that way. Thanks for stopping in. I greatly appreciate you. Cpat: I sincerely do find comfort in your words. It is not an issue spoke about daily, but it does exist. Thank you for your constant connection. It keeps me grounded I hope your situation finds light and peace. JanetMarie: You touch my heart with kindness. Your encouragement and sentiments will not be forgotten. Sincerely, Regina |
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