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Slithers In
| Open Poetry #15 |
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Slithers In |
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VAS Member Rara Avis
since 2000-11-16
Posts 7450Oregon |
I wish I could post this with the same font I have here, it is so cool, for the theme of this one. Slithers In Virginia Salter hatred comes in slithering silently weaving its way into your thoughts your actions your very life bringing death to any semblance of love as its venom drips from its bite into your sinew, your blood carrying with it a yeast that grows filling all cavities permeating all flesh until it subdues overtaking all that is good. listen diligently for a rattle, a warning, of its very nature; pray for discernment © July 24, 2000 |
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| © Copyright 2001 Virginia Salter - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Temptress
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-06-15
Posts 7136Mobile, AL |
The image and thoughts you present here are excellent in my opinion. I love this. It describes very effectively how hate can sort of sneak up on us and take control. |
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Cpat Hair
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793 |
powerful images VAS... strongly written.. I enjoyed |
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Decaflame Senior Member
since 2001-05-11
Posts 1635 |
I would only offer one change, that being "yeast" to "poison" or a like word...you took me from "snake" to "bread" and I was a bit put off from that.... not put out....just off.... and this is just a suggestion.... |
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SmittenKitten Senior Member
since 2001-06-20
Posts 1131where the sky and horizon meet |
What a perfect image! This was so well written  great poem~Krista |
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VAS Member Rara Avis
since 2000-11-16
Posts 7450Oregon |
thank you all, and Deca...I understand your words, but I chose yeast because of its very nature, to grow with nothing more than a little heat to feed it...also sin/hate and related are said to grow, like leaven or cancer, in scriptures, so yeast is what I wish to retain. Thanks for your thoughts, though, very much. |
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