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Teen Poetry #5

Nothing I Can Do

Kicking Kim
Member

since 2001-04-16

Posts 426
Cloud Cucko Land!

0 posted 2001-08-11 07:30 PM

You're so close to my heart
and theres nothing I can do,
about your rebellious life
leading you
into a bleeding state.
The way theres no future anymore
in your unlived life,
all that is left
is a picture you once were
which is a historical memory
of your blooming life.
I can't believe
how much you've changed,
deteriorating into a blitz of nothing.
I can't believe
your carefree attitude
to such an ungraceful tragedy.
But most of all,
I can't believe
I let you get this way.

"Theres no posession, just obsession and growing depression"

Allan Riverwood

Member Elite

since 2001-01-04

Posts 3502
Winnipeg

1 posted 2001-08-11 08:03 PM

Hey, good poem. You had a lot of emotion packed into it. Must have been a pretty trying time when you wrote this. But oh well.
I do think you did a fine job of this poem.
Yours,
~Allan

The children of the nobility are playing here. they look up at you with disgust as you come near.

LoneWolf
Member

since 2001-03-10

Posts 384
IL

2 posted 2001-08-11 08:59 PM

Hey i liked this one a lot, there is a lot of emotion in it. good job here

It's too bad I'm not as wonderful a person as people say I am, because the world could use a few people like that.
I've learned that even when you th

Fading Away

Member Elite

since 2001-03-14

Posts 3131
Lynchburg, Virginia

3 posted 2001-08-12 11:52 AM

Very well written, Kim.. Emotional writing, here.
"I can't believe
how much you've changed,
deteriorating into a blitz of nothing."
I really like those likes... "a blitz of nothing". Nicely done! I hope all is well now..

--Marie

You think yourself a failure, but perhaps the biggest loss is winning.

Spice
Senior Member

since 2001-04-13

Posts 1266
Resting in my cardboard box.

4 posted 2001-08-14 06:50 PM

Nice write, Kim. Overflowing with feeling. I liked it. I know how frustrated you might feel- I've one through similar situations. Thanks for the read.

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