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Isabel Galaxia
Senior Member

since 2000-06-18

Posts 733

0 posted 2001-08-04 10:46 PM

There's a tiny flicker
Like candle light
In perfect darkness
That surrounds me
An escape from reality
And the weight that comes
With being a teenager
When nobody thinks you are
An offer of comfort
And stability
To offer a little shield
From the winds of the storm
A place to rest
And lay my head
When no one else cares
And I've pushed myself too far
That tiny flicker
That candle light is you and
If you were to offer me forever
I'd be tempted to accept.

- To you, mi amor.

Bel

Kaos
Member

since 2001-08-02

Posts 317
between space and time

1 posted 2001-08-04 10:59 PM

I loved the way you ended that poem...it just left a build up of emotion hanging in thin air, cool poem

" How can i feel if i can't breathe...?"
- Godsmack

Fading Away

Member Elite

since 2001-03-14

Posts 3131
Lynchburg, Virginia

2 posted 2001-08-05 01:04 AM

Very nicely done, Bel. I liked the ending.. The analogy you used here is very creative. I enjoyed this one bunches!

--Marie

You think yourself a failure, but perhaps the biggest loss is winning.

Spice
Senior Member

since 2001-04-13

Posts 1266
Resting in my cardboard box.

3 posted 2001-08-06 03:26 PM

Thats a very sweet write for the love of your life. I enjoyed it bunches.

keoni
Senior Member

since 2000-10-16

Posts 850
Up in the mountains in the NFC

4 posted 2001-08-06 03:48 PM

Very nice poem. I think the ending was great.
Jon

"Your anger is a gift"-Rage Against The Machine
"Only God can judge me" Tupac Shakur

CLBinLOVE
Member

since 2000-06-04

Posts 147
Hilton Head, SC, USA

5 posted 2001-08-06 10:11 PM

hey well i guess i should check this site a bit more often, almost missed this one

wow...now this poem...i really like it, is all i can say, cuz im kinda speechless at the moment.
Thank you, i love you
CLB

"as below so above and beyond i imagine
drawn beyond the lines of reason
push the envelope, watch it bend"
--Tool

allie
Member

since 2001-07-09

Posts 218
Australia

6 posted 2001-08-07 07:09 AM

Really sweet post!!
I loved the ending too *sorry to be repetitive*

ALLIE

Heavens Tears

Senior Member

since 2001-03-15

Posts 677

7 posted 2001-08-07 03:14 PM

This was a wonderful poem. While it isnt my fav from you, it was still very well written and emotional. Nicely done!

Dopey Dope

Moderator

Member Patricius

since 2000-08-30

Posts 11132
San Juan, Puerto Rico

8 posted 2001-08-08 04:11 PM

Me likies......I enjoyed this. Very very sweet.

I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust.

Somewhere out there a cow is laughing at you

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