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Teen Poetry #5
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I'm a girl
| Teen Poetry #5 |
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I'm a girl |
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Pollita Member
since 2002-07-25
Posts 220the unknown realm of insanity |
I am strong and beautiful. Honest and smart. I hate having to cry,but have a delicate heart. I will not let people tell me what to do. I am always on my best behavior,and always speak the truth. I have power over my life and only mine. If i cry do not worry,for i'll be fine. I stand up tall and swallow my pride. Speak my mind,have nothing to hide. Step aside,keep what you want to say. Because i am a girl. So get out of MY way! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Wanting him is hard to get.Loving him is hard to regret.Losing him is hard to accept.But with all the hurt i've felt,letting go is the most painful ye |
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| © Copyright 2002 Delaniie Quirk - All Rights Reserved | |||
Android 17
since 2001-07-21
Posts 664Winnipeg |
HAhahahaha---Delaney, you're so cute! On the other hand...there's nothing wrong with showing Female Pride, now is there? Others are too in love with the sound of their own voice to speak the truth... |
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Pollita Member
since 2002-07-25
Posts 220the unknown realm of insanity |
No not at all! I'm so happy to be who and what i am! So i'm glad you checked pretty much all my poems!Thanks for your time! |
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anya Member
since 2002-07-27
Posts 393London, UK |
very uplifting, made me smile, thankyou anya |
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Local Parasite
since 2001-11-05
Posts 2527Transylconia, Winnipeg |
An interesting synopsis of the fairer sex. Quite amusing.  Parasite |
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chasing rain Senior Member
since 2001-05-15
Posts 737Canada |
Pollita- lol. It's good that you have a strong character and esteem. And I can see that you show this through the confidence in your writing. Your get your message across quite well in this piece, however, the meter sometimes "wanders" off. The cause? Some of the lines are a bit wordy. No fear, Leah is here! (Run for your life...) You can fix this by rewording some of the lines, such as: "I am always on my best behavior,and always speak the truth." to I'm honest and friendly, and say naught but the truth. Or something like that. ^^ It basically gets the same message across. Another way to solve wordiness (word? Probably not. ^^) is to cut the line in half: "I am strong and beautiful. Honest and smart. I hate having to cry,but have a delicate heart." to I am strong and beautiful. Honest and smart. I hate having to cry, But have a delicate heart. However, your way is fine and so there is really no reason to change it unless you think it's for the best. Other than that, a good read. I liked the last two lines the best. ^_^ Hope to see more from you! -Leah- |
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Purple Lightning New Member
since 2002-07-28
Posts 9Riding |
This stuck a chord with me. Well written indeed! I'm sure that many would want Elrond, but Legolas is fine for me. |
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Skyfire
since 2000-12-27
Posts 3381Riding |
Oh hey! This is so me! I can't believe Alex kept you hidden from me for so long! Wow!! |
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bsquirrel
since 2000-01-03
Posts 7855 |
 She said burn ... together. |
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Pollita Member
since 2002-07-25
Posts 220the unknown realm of insanity |
Thank you all!And skyfire thank you your message was so nice.Yea alex kept me hidden from everyone.Well in poetry at least.lol thanks leah.i will try and fix my work.I am very happy that your were very honest.thank you everyone! |
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Jenn Cirrincione
since 2000-07-02
Posts 2107Fl |
Mwhahahahaha! I'm feeling the girl power. Right on honey.  "I'm just a girl, in a world- that's all that they'll let me beeeeeeeeee." Jenn Why is it that we are at our most ingenius only when trying to destroy the things that keep us alive and thriving? |
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Pollita Member
since 2002-07-25
Posts 220the unknown realm of insanity |
aww thanks jenn. ya girls rule!!!!! I'm glad all these people read and reply to my poems i'm even more pleased that they like my poems. I'll keep writing as long as you peoples keep reading! ~*~Pollita~*~ |
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