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Flitters
| Teen Poetry #5 |
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Flitters |
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allie Member
since 2001-07-09
Posts 218Australia |
This is my attempt at poerty without a set structure. After the advice i got from my last post i thought i'd give something different a go. Please tell me what you think! Allie He opens his eyes, And it is for the first time. Her eyes are lost in his, The world a pale fog filled blue, Their eyes are soulamtes. Her voice plays rhythmically in his ears. Creating a harmony somewhere inside. Their past is irrelevant... the future is clear. Lights, Flash, Then sting. Breaking the harmony, filtering the fog. hope flitters away. Sounds, Metal, On Metal, Stealing their future. Filtering the fog, Which flitters away. He closes his eyes And it is for the final time. "An artist must know how to convince others of the truth of his lies." |
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| © Copyright 2002 Alex - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Dark Enchantress Senior Member
since 1999-07-27
Posts 1258meet Morgana |
I'm not really into poems that aren't personal and straight from the real life experiences of the author, but I did enjoy this poem. I think that you did well without the structure. The poem carried the reader through it and into the characters' emotions very well. "if you know me so well then tell me which hand do I use?" Tori Amos |
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