Abandoning your yuppie penguins

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LCBS
Senior Member

since 2001-11-29

Posts 532
Connecticut

0 posted 2002-04-06 12:39 PM

You may need to read this: /pip/Forum40/HTML/000914.html

Twas a frigid night that April
When this penguin took the dive
Into the icy waters of this sea
In order to survive

See it seems this place was sinking
Into oblivious destruction
And older penguins kept swimming
through pools of obstruction

They said they did not like
What their home had become
Overgrown with yuppie penguins
They began to succumb

With last words of morality
They abandoned us with hopes
That we would sink our home soon
and not be able to float

I won’t leave us to drown
I’ll carry them all as I swim
Because someone did that to you once
Didn’t flee when the world got grim

So I’ll plunge into these icy waters
To save the lives of others
Where are your penguin morals
Don’t you love your young brothers

Looks like some penguins lost their way
Its a shame that these elders had to leave
To bad they came to hate their home
to think that we are all naïve

We know that we’re very young
In our penguin adolescence
But I won’t watch my home sink
While sitting in acquiescence

I am somewhat afraid of controversy...but hey if this got my muse to work again, then I must post it...it is also how I feel. Say what you will about my intentions its just something I wrote and wanted feedback on>

~lISA

[This message has been edited by LCBS (04-06-2002 12:46 AM).]

PoetryIsLife

Senior Member

since 2001-10-27

Posts 1763
...in my boxers...

1 posted 2002-04-06 02:00 AM

DAMN.

I love it!

Not merely the message... which is a good one.

But the way you took an idea, and just went BAM! with it. It's awesome! The picture you paint is so clear, and imagenative!

I love it!

Love the stanzas, the flow, the length, the feel of it. Pukka, baby!

~ Titus

"Tesous Christos, Theou Uios, Soter"

Poet deVine

Administrator

Member Seraphic

since 1999-05-26

Posts 22612
Hurricane Alley

2 posted 2002-04-06 08:24 PM

This is great! Your muse was truly kicked in the butt here! I read Zu's post and your poem echoed it. I hope to see more from you.

xShUgArHiGhx

Member Elite

since 2000-09-26

Posts 3150
tRyIn tO fIt iN2 mY oWn ShoEs

3 posted 2002-04-06 09:21 PM

LoL Lisa!! Great job!!! What a great idea

iTs bEeN 1 Of ThOsE dAyZ 4 2 MaNY dAyZ nOw..I jUst NeEd a DaY whErE tHe WOrLd cAn tAkE cArE of ItsElf..

Dark Enchantress
Senior Member

since 1999-07-27

Posts 1258
meet Morgana

4 posted 2002-04-08 07:11 PM

It caught my eye at first because I love penguins, but also because the title looked interesting. So I read and I'm very glad I did. I love the message you present with this poem. It's very interesting how you expressed yourself with this poem. Well done.

Thanks for posting

DE

"I never claimed to be your savior
I said I had a dirty mouth
Stop analyzing my behavior
If you’re too dumb to work it out"
Garbage

quietlydying

Senior Member

since 2001-06-10

Posts 935
the wonderful land of oz

5 posted 2002-04-09 10:31 PM

i love the way you responded to zu in a poem.

heh. it's great.

and his grrrrrr...

i shouldn't even get into it, but i can't stand people who are so full of themselves. ::cough cough zu:: or at least think they're so much better than everyone else.

but i just didn't feel like making a big deal out of it.

meh.

great job lisa.

/jen/

so foul and fair a day i have not seen. - macbeth act 1, scene 3

Skyfire

Member Elite

since 2000-12-27

Posts 3381
Riding

6 posted 2002-04-10 12:04 PM

Hey Lisa, awesome poem!! I just want to point out that it wasn't because of him being 'full of himself' that he left... there are other reasons which I won't go into.

Nevertheless, excellent poem! Can't wait to read more!

I am a geek!!

PoetryIsLife

Senior Member

since 2001-10-27

Posts 1763
...in my boxers...

7 posted 2002-04-10 12:07 PM

*poke*

Sky, email me.

~
Titus

"Tesous Christos, Theou Uios, Soter"

quietlydying

Senior Member

since 2001-06-10

Posts 935
the wonderful land of oz

8 posted 2002-04-10 12:21 PM

oh no, i'm aware of the 'other reasons'.

it's just that his 'leaving thread' was rather disgusting.  or at least so i found it to be.  the way he spoke gave the impression that he feels he's better than everyone else around here.  he seems to act as if he's more intelligent, a more talented writer, and so on.

it's pretty (edit) annoying if you ask me.

just because he's been here longer than most people.  he was acting as if he was god.

/jen/

so foul and fair a day i have not seen.  - macbeth act 1, scene 3

[This message has been edited by vlraynes (04-10-2002 11:37 PM).]

Marshalzu

Member Elite

since 2001-02-15

Posts 2681
Lurking

9 posted 2002-04-10 06:31 PM

Hehe thank you for such a wonderful reminder of what Teen Poetry should be about

Tell all your friends, your neighbours too, CNN, BBC World News, tell all your friends about Mr Zu

CwboyAtHeart
Senior Member

since 2001-04-14

Posts 541
Selah, WA, USA

10 posted 2002-04-10 07:12 PM

Wow... VERY cool. I really liked this, very well written. Awesome message, too. Good job and nice to see that your muse is back on the job.

      - Cody -

Note To Self:  If Pigs Can Fly, So Can I!!!

If someboy laughs at me, does that make me funny or just plain stupid?

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