My Conversation with God..

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Alyssa

Member

since 2001-05-30

Posts 385
IM ENGAGED!!!!!

0 posted 2001-07-11 08:37 PM

He Stood there, staring at me.
Or Right through me?

"I saw Your soul"
did you see my fears?
"yes"
the cold scary past, or the bright unknown future?
"both"
did you see my tears?
"yes"
the ones to come, or the ones cried last?
"both"
did you see my dreams?
"yes"
the ones that will come true, or the ones to die?
"both"
did you see my youth?
"yes"
the happy part, or the saddest?
"both"
did you see the truth?
"about what my child?"
about my love, my heart...
"yes"
the dying broken part, or the cracked?
"the part that is mending my child"
it cannot be fixed
"yes it can. it will. In time, it will"

Hestood there, staring at me.
Right through me.....
Good or bad????

"Like, yeah."-the famous cheerleaders
"And if I say yes, what do I get?"-again the famous cheerleaders

SEA

Moderator

Member Seraphic

since 2000-01-18

Posts 22676
with you

1 posted 2001-07-11 08:58 PM

good

very very good!!

CwboyAtHeart
Senior Member

since 2001-04-14

Posts 541
Selah, WA, USA

2 posted 2001-07-12 01:00 AM

I liked this one...

- Cody -

If Pigs Can Fly, So Can I!!!

If someboy laughs at me, does that make me funny or just plain stupid?

JBaker515

Member

since 2001-02-28

Posts 458
Dartmouth College

3 posted 2001-07-12 01:03 AM

Alyssa..
this was really provoking..i loved it!!

~Jeff~

"Within you I lose myself
Without you I find myself
Wanting to be lost again."

Skyfire

Member Elite

since 2000-12-27

Posts 3381
Riding

4 posted 2001-07-12 01:56 AM

Okay, that is making me think... Great read!!

Rhonda

"Amy, can you PLEASE come to Spain with us so that we have someone to keep Rhonda calm?" - Mr. Ardiel *insert hysterical laughter from me here*

anonymous albert ?

Member Elite

since 2001-03-23

Posts 2979

5 posted 2001-07-12 02:01 AM

hmmm...i liked it very much...well done on writing this Alyssa

...definitly..good!

im addicted to passions in poetry!...are you?

Dopey Dope

Moderator

Member Patricius

since 2000-08-30

Posts 11132
San Juan, Puerto Rico

6 posted 2001-07-12 03:38 AM

I liked this very much. I thought you wrote it well. However, I did think that the ending was a bit weak and could use some punch. Anyway, the whole thing was nicely done....

I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust.

Somewhere out there a cow is laughing at you

Spice
Senior Member

since 2001-04-13

Posts 1266
Resting in my cardboard box.

7 posted 2001-07-12 04:03 AM

I agree with Dopes- I didn't like the ending at all. Other than that though- I thought it was a great piece.

Alyssa

Member

since 2001-05-30

Posts 385
IM ENGAGED!!!!!

8 posted 2001-07-12 11:03 AM

i dont like the ending much either,any ideas guyz?
thanks all!

"Like, yeah."-the famous cheerleaders
"And if I say yes, what do I get?"-again the famous cheerleaders

Fading Away

Member Elite

since 2001-03-14

Posts 3131
Lynchburg, Virginia

9 posted 2001-07-15 10:27 PM

This was pretty good. I really like the message. Nicely done.

--Marie

You can’t expect the roses to grow without the weeds.

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