Teen Poetry #5 |
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for the last time |
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ScrpyCJ New Member
since 2002-06-24
Posts 9 |
The walls are closing in on me, My life is slipping away, My love wasn't truly my love, She slowly turned away, She coaxed me into her trap, I shared my love with her, We talked and shared some moments together, She really didn't love me, I know for this is not my love, Because she lied to me, She doesn't know one single thing, that puts me piece by piece, She used me like I was a rock, I didn't see it, Not even a bit, Its because I loved her And she didn't love me back, Get out of my life, Stay away from my heart, You cheated your way through my heart, For the last time. |
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© Copyright 2002 ScrpyCJ - All Rights Reserved | |||
cutiepiesugarbabie Member
since 2002-06-07
Posts 110A Cloud In the Sky |
wow a lil harsh...but a good poem! ![]() o*~Everyone makes mistakes-get over them and make more tomorrow!~*o |
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Tomer Senior Member
since 2002-06-28
Posts 1168Michigan |
A very strong piece, very deep. Well done. Tomer |
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Dark Enchantress Senior Member
since 1999-07-27
Posts 1258meet Morgana |
It sounded a little shrill and teary, but still strong enough. Like you weren't just telling her that it wasn't real love and to stay away, but telling yourself as well. I think that's interesting because it shows the inner weaknesses and defences of our state of mentality. I think there's a lot to be said for a person that can stand up for themselves (especially when it comes to someone you had "love" for). Good job. [Jaime] "I think I would like to call myself 'the girl who wanted to be God'." Sylvia Plath [This message has been edited by Dark Enchantress (06-30-2002 11:02 AM).] |
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Tess7 New Member
since 2002-06-30
Posts 4 |
I thought that was cool, realistic and that's why I liked it. Nice |
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punkrockerrobin![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]()
since 2001-05-15
Posts 1180Sparks, NV |
wow! aweosme piece tks for the read! robin |
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punkrockerrobin![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]()
since 2001-05-15
Posts 1180Sparks, NV |
hey nice write thanks for sharin. |
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cutiepiesugarbabie Member
since 2002-06-07
Posts 110A Cloud In the Sky |
well...i'm guessing i kno who this is about and i'm sry for the way she acted ![]() |
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