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Teen Poetry #5
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A step out of the Light
| Teen Poetry #5 |
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A step out of the Light |
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xShUgArHiGhx 
since 2000-09-26
Posts 3150tRyIn tO fIt iN2 mY oWn ShoEs |
"Its strong" i tell you, "and its mad at me for pushing it away". I try to explain how it forces itself upon me, But you tell me to fight it and not look the other way. Im easily loured I guess, I dont think i was ever ready to let go. So comfortable in my dark place, More secure than anyone could know. It whispers for me to come, And lay along side it for a while. Then when i say i want to leave, It senses my feeling of denial. Tears in a glass jar, Put on a table next to my bed. Screams and moans of discomfort, Echo off the walls into my head. Its so much easier to give in, Then to put up this fight. Depression, the undefeated champion, Beckons for company the second i step outta the light. BoOsH bOoSh nApoLE |
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| © Copyright 2002 Michele - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Android 17
since 2001-07-21
Posts 664Winnipeg |
Hmmmmmm...this is very interesting. The beginning part made me raise an eyebrow---but it's all cleared up now that I've read the end. I liked this...the last few lines are so true! "Snake, always remember that your mind if your most dangerous weapon. If things get too complicated---simplify your thoughts! |
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Heavens Tears
since 2001-03-15
Posts 677 |
I really enjoyed this. "Tears in a glass jar, Put on a table next to my bed." Awesome imagery here. This only thing I noticed to critique was your use of "outta". It just kinda stuck out after all the imagery and all. Other than that, I thought it was wonderful. |
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xShUgArHiGhx
since 2000-09-26
Posts 3150tRyIn tO fIt iN2 mY oWn ShoEs |
Thanks guys  Im so bad with proper spelling its insane!!! Thanks for pointing it out though BoOsH bOoSh nApoLE |
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Acies
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-07
Posts 7665Twilight Zone |
very interesting write Michelle Now why would you wanna go back things aint easy in life, getting rid of the bad is included just keep fighting it and be strong thanks for sharing là où est mon amour? |
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aaron woodside Member
since 2001-09-26
Posts 256 |
I know exactly how you feel here. Being depressed is like a giant black hole that just keeps sucking you right back in. It's so hard to get away from it. After awhile you learn to almost feel comfortable in your "darkness" and you lose sight of what life could be like. It's so hard to explain what depression feels like to people who have never been really depressed. When they say just fight it they don't realize just how hard that can be since, it seems like you come to accept that this is the way life is going to be. I loved the personification of depression. It shows that depression is not just something you can ignore, and it will go away. Loved it.  ex animo, Aaron There are no great men, only men in great circumstances. |
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xShUgArHiGhx
since 2000-09-26
Posts 3150tRyIn tO fIt iN2 mY oWn ShoEs |
Thank you both of you for reading and replying to this poem BoOsH bOoSh nApoLE |
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anonymous albert ?
since 2001-03-23
Posts 2979 |
Michele. *Hugs* so heartfelt and written with emotions of experience. "Screams and moans of discomfort, Echo off the walls into my head." That hit me hard...I related. Stay strong and Take care "Dont piss me off. Im runing out of places to hide the bodies" [This message has been edited by anonymous albert ? (02-07-2002 01:15 AM).] |
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DancinQueen
since 2000-07-29
Posts 1092Kokomo,IN,USA |
oo gave me chills! Wonderful poem michi. very deep and powerful. I liked the last 2 lines especially you keep getting better and better...dont stop!*kiley **You can't always trust the people you want to** |
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gymnast Member
since 2001-11-18
Posts 80Scotland. |
This poem just kept getting better and better!ILOVED it! hope to see lots lots more! |
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xShUgArHiGhx
since 2000-09-26
Posts 3150tRyIn tO fIt iN2 mY oWn ShoEs |
Thanks everyone mE & cHrIsTiNe GaVe A WhOlE nEw mEaNiNg tO ThE wOrD "iNcOgNiTo" |
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gracianna Member
since 2002-02-17
Posts 165A 14 year hell |
I like it...It is quite true. Depression sort of sucks me in, until there is nothing left of the me that everyone used to know. I like it in the dark tunnel. I don't want to come out... I give a whole new meaning to the word 'sad.' |
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keoni Senior Member
since 2000-10-16
Posts 850Up in the mountains in the NFC |
Great poem. I liked it. Depression definately does that. ANd it's a hard fight to get back out. Good job, nice to read your work again. It's been awhile Jon "Only God can judge me" Tupac Shakur |
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xShUgArHiGhx
since 2000-09-26
Posts 3150tRyIn tO fIt iN2 mY oWn ShoEs |
Thanks for reading guys...it definately is a hard thing to get away from..almost as if it were an addiction..you dont wanna go but somehow you know you have to mE & cHrIsTiNe GaVe A WhOlE nEw mEaNiNg tO ThE wOrD "iNcOgNiTo" |
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Ceinwyn Member Elite
since 2000-07-09
Posts 2175VA |
OMG I'm glad I read this, it's almost like an addiction so true..once you allow yourself to step out of that light it catches you *sigh* One minute we can be strong and the next brought to our knees..amazing poem and it's funny because this too shall pass..it always does Love, Kristen |
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Spine Grinder Senior Member
since 2000-10-28
Posts 1127Standing In Silence... |
this wuz great. i luved it. awesum job.  ~If u luv something, let it go,if it comes back 2 u, its urs, if it doesnt, it never wuz..~DMX |
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