Teen Poetry #5 |
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house of dissection |
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fearing-laughter Senior Member
since 2001-04-24
Posts 605land of cheese (Wisconsin) |
hey,um if anyone wants to know where the hell this came from the answer is i have no idea lol. it just came to me, although i've felt this way before i don't at the moment. please read it and reply honestly with any suggestions you might have, and your opinions. thanks! rip me open and pull me apart delicatly picking at the pieces of my heart slice my mind open just to find out what is on the inside pluck my organs out one by one and carefully place them back in my ravaged body backwards, and upside down simply because it makes you smile laugh as if you were insane slice me dice me i think you want to hear me scream before you destroy me but sadly, in reality all you needed to accomplish this were a few words and my love to throw spitefully back at my face. so now i shall lay still there's no point in fighting anymore welcome to the house of dissection -bergundy- maybe i'll catch fire, something nice to warm me. something pure to burn away the darkness, that hides inside my mind. -alkaline trio- [This message has been edited by fearing-laughter (01-04-2002 11:24 PM).] |
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© Copyright 2002 bergundy - All Rights Reserved | |||
Lisa_bebe15 Member
since 2001-11-15
Posts 151Florida |
I love that to be truthfull..I love poems like that..I can't write em..but I love to read em..I guess I am crazy..well thats what the doc's say..crazy in the head..I loved that..maybe others didnt..but I did and thats why I left this note..water over matter |
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xShUgArHiGhx![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]()
since 2000-09-26
Posts 3150tRyIn tO fIt iN2 mY oWn ShoEs |
This was definately morbid...yikes!!! Gory even now that i think about it...nicely written...good job! ShE'S nOt ThE kInDa GiRL..WhO lIkeS tO tElL tHe WorLd AbOuT tHe Way She FEEL'S aBouT hErSelf...ShE tAkEs a LiTtLe TiMe In MakIn uP hEr MiNd.. |
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prov1717 Member
since 2001-12-26
Posts 74NE |
aah very descriptive and full of emotion, nice write! |
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HiddenSparklez Member
since 2000-12-29
Posts 190British Columbia, Canada |
It's hard to define where you were going in this poem, but indeed it is what you said it was a poem you have no idea where it came from (me neither!). This poem did intrigue me to read it again so it was worth posting! ![]() "You do what you do, you say what you say, you try to be everything to everyone... come on now, do that stupid dance for me" -Everclear |
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TopGunLauren Senior Member
since 2000-08-02
Posts 718California |
I love this poem because it's got and interesting style to it.But anyway I can't wait to read more keep up the awsome work. Lauren "I just needed someone to talk to you were just to busy with yourself."-Staind |
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Alyssa![]() ![]() ![]() ![]()
since 2001-05-30
Posts 385IM ENGAGED!!!!! |
Wow ....Handle with care... |
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Android 17![]() ![]()
since 2001-07-21
Posts 664Winnipeg |
*Strokes chin* Hmmm...I really enjoy this. Not only does it speak the truth---but the somewhat morbid images really, really described the pain. I know this pain well---and I felt...that no matter what I write, you nailed down the emotions and pain pretty well. You have my respect! Be sure to keep writing such beatiful peices! The trick is to know when to walk away---and TO KNOW WHEN TO RUN!!! |
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Poet on Acid Member
since 2001-01-07
Posts 325Florida, USA |
Wow...bloody...frightening...and a bit of love mixed in...Sarcasm aside it was a great poem even though the subject matter is obviously negative. "It is better to have loved and lost than to have never have loved at all" ...but the pain of both is equally unbearable... |
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fearing-laughter Senior Member
since 2001-04-24
Posts 605land of cheese (Wisconsin) |
thanks for replying ppl! lol and tony..since when do you have a problem with negative subjects lol. -bergundy- |
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Mon Cherie![]() ![]()
since 2001-10-31
Posts 922Land of Never-ending Summers |
all you needed to accomplish this were a few words and my love to throw spitefully back at my face. I have to agree that when you love someone, it takes very little from this person to throw your whole world into complete chaos. Then you'll be left all alone to pick up the broken pieces of your life. ![]() _,,,^.^,,,_ |
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TigerZ Member
since 2002-01-02
Posts 83Ontario, Canada |
Very interesting poem...I had to read it twice. A life without loveā¦is no life at all. |
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