Teen Poetry #5 |
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I Hate You! |
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Zukene_Chic Member
since 2001-09-26
Posts 152Cali ![]() |
You say you love me. You say I'm pretty. You say I'm the sweetest thing ever. I doubt you love me. I know you think I'm a whore. I know you would be rid of me if you could. I hate you. |
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© Copyright 2002 Trinity Celeste - All Rights Reserved | |||
Dark Enchantress Senior Member
since 1999-07-27
Posts 1258meet Morgana |
So let's blow'em to hell!!! Hmm.. maybe not. Well I'm glad you let your emotions flow out. Who cares what they think? Their opinion isn't important. Yours is... screw them if they're too stupid to see you for all that you are. ![]() ![]() The only thing that I fear is to die quietly. |
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TopGunLauren Senior Member
since 2000-08-02
Posts 718California |
Wow...this is one piece filled with a lot of emotion. And all I can say is do whatever you feel is right.But anyway I liked this poem a lot. Lauren "I just needed someone to talk to you were just to busy with yourself."-Staind |
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~*brittt*~ Member
since 2001-05-09
Posts 76East Haddam, CT |
hey you really expressed yourself very well. dont guys just suck??? ~britt~ |
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Tamma![]() ![]() ![]()
since 2000-01-17
Posts 794In His Arms, Harpers Ferry, WV |
hmmm...doesnt this situation just suck? I've been there, too many tymes to count. But, let him think what he wants, cause if you know the truth, thats all that matters, right? ~ Tamma If I held a star everytyme |
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Fading Away![]() ![]() ![]()
since 2001-03-14
Posts 3131Lynchburg, Virginia |
Lots of resentment in this poem. It's full of heavy emotions... I hope things work out for you. And be careful - remember, no more than 3 posts in a day ![]() ![]() --Marie "It was a long December, but there's reason to believe that maybe this year will be better than the last." (Counting Crows) |
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EagleScorpion Senior Member
since 2000-03-08
Posts 1644Here, Now, Forever |
hmmm.... yup sounds like a jerkoff to me! bag the moron before he hurts you! |
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fearing-laughter Senior Member
since 2001-04-24
Posts 605land of cheese (Wisconsin) |
interesting...i like it. and this guy is obviously just one big giant whoreface times five. although if you're angry at him it is quite good to get it out. great job on this.be happy -bergundy- maybe i'll catch fire, something nice to warm me. something pure to burn away the darkness, that hides inside my mind. -alkaline trio- |
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xShUgArHiGhx![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]()
since 2000-09-26
Posts 3150tRyIn tO fIt iN2 mY oWn ShoEs |
Wow this was full of emotion!!!! Nice job!!!!!! I liked it!! He sounds like a jerk... ShE'S nOt ThE kInDa GiRL..WhO lIkeS tO tElL tHe WorLd AbOuT tHe Way She FEEL'S aBouT hErSelf...ShE tAkEs a LiTtLe TiMe In MakIn uP hEr MiNd.. |
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gymnast Member
since 2001-11-18
Posts 80Scotland. |
I love this poem and all it's emotion-it's really great! Keep it up!! And the guy sounds like a jerk-I'm guessing you could do much better(I mean a guy, not a poem!!)!!! |
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punkrockerrobin![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]()
since 2001-05-15
Posts 1180Sparks, NV |
WOW! so much emotion and memories! i loved it! i got my anger out just by reading this thanks! love me and rhonda for ti loves us! |
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lone_poet707 Member
since 2001-11-17
Posts 70black hole named Aylmer |
it seems to me we both have one thing in common- we r both filled with a lot of anger and resentment. im glad ur finding a means to vent all of it constructively, however, in this case, maybe u'd be better off to shoot off at him. theres too much emotion in dis piece to just leave it all on the paper...with dat said, great piece! -Joe |
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Acies![]()
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-07
Posts 7665Twilight Zone |
I believe you need a talk with this person you should ask him how he really thinks about you thanks for sharing là où est mon amour? |
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stace_co2003 Member
since 2001-03-30
Posts 497In a dream world |
I didn't like this poem at all. It seems a common theme in poetry posted in here recently has been of this type. Maybe I'm just a depressed psycho, but I'm getting kinda tired of it. There's nothing wrong with writing your feelings, I'm not saying that, Im just saying, write a good I hate life poem instead. I'd love to read that. If someone said, "Write a sentence about your life," I'd write "I want to go outside and play." [This message has been edited by stace_co2003 (01-04-2002 10:53 AM).] |
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Roberta Little Junior Member
since 2001-12-18
Posts 42beloit wi usa |
zukene_chic- that waz cool. next time he bothers you just shoot him(jk)! well if u cant tell him off good. he deserves it. later chic. GOD's greatist gift is LOVE |
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Spice Senior Member
since 2001-04-13
Posts 1266Resting in my cardboard box. |
Good, I can critique! (I hate it when poeple dont allow critiques....They might as well just say "I only accept praises on my poetry") Anyway! I'm with Stace here...Twasn't one of my favorite reads of the day. I dunno, free verse and grudge-filled venting poems are always my FAVORITE in the world...but this, this just had no real poetic feel to it...It was just...there. Just plain-jane sentences...I wasn't feeling it. But then again, not everyone "feels" things formt he same poem...obviously a few others in here did...Maybe I'm just missing something? I think if you brought some sense of a meter into it, or emphasized words or made it a bit longr and had some sort of cynical tone to it...who knows though...just some thoughts of mine. "I'd rather die purposely alone than to have lived an accidental life of solitude."- Jesa "§ùgã®" Thompson |
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fozzyozzy Member
since 2001-03-15
Posts 336Lessburg Virginia |
Whoa. The title grabbed me there. I wish I could say something to help you out, but I'm probably the last person in the world who should be giving relationship advice. "The dust of the travelled road shall touch my hands and face" |
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Jenn Cirrincione![]() ![]()
since 2000-07-02
Posts 2107Fl |
Well I'm with Jesa. Now I love how the anger sits in this piece, almost poised to grow. You could get so much into this if you just put some length into it. Great start to it tho. ![]() Jenn "You are the strength, that keeps me walking- you are the hope that keeps me trusting." |
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