Yet to be named (suggestions welcome!!)

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Wood_Stock
Member

since 2001-05-09

Posts 58
The little yellow

0 posted 2001-07-07 10:17 AM

I just wrote this, and well, I can't really think of a name for it, so any ideas will be warmly welcomed!

heh heh, anyway, on with the show.......
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Feelings held inside,
Bursting to get out.
It hurts so much I cry,
Look to the stars and shout.

I am so confused,
Like I've never felt before.
A word that's over-used,
But I've never been so sure.

Yet I find no comfort,
There's no peace of mind.
Life can be so short,
And love so hard to find.

There's so many things I feel,
Yet I don't know a thing.
When it hurts, it must be real,
But why should good thoughts sting?

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Hmmm... I dunno fella's, again the questions comes up. What is love..?
I hate doing this to myself, I'm sure you lot do it too sometimes, chuck on some depressing music and just think...? Well, anyway, I guess some questions have no definate answers....

Wood_Stock.

Kicking Kim
Member

since 2001-04-16

Posts 426
Cloud Cucko Land!

1 posted 2001-07-07 12:16 PM

Wow this is an excellent poem. Perhaps you could call it "Indescribable" because you seem unsure of how to lebal love without under portraying this wonderful feeling. Maybe there is no actual way to describe it truly?! Very strong poem. Keep writing!

^*~Kicking Kim~*^

"Theres no posession, just obsession and growing depression"

Heavens Tears

Senior Member

since 2001-03-15

Posts 677

2 posted 2001-07-07 12:18 PM

Great poem. I cant really think of a name for it, so... But I think you should use Kims title. It sounds good.

*Amanda*
I need more time to find the real me...
to fly like the birds... to be set free.

anonymous albert ?

Member Elite

since 2001-03-23

Posts 2979

3 posted 2001-07-07 02:18 PM

overall this had so much behind it...esp

"Yet I find no comfort,
There's no peace of mind.
Life can be so short,
And love so hard to find"

that hit me home...for many different reasons...great poem.

im addicted to passions in poetry!...are you?

Marshalzu

Member Elite

since 2001-02-15

Posts 2681
Lurking

4 posted 2001-07-07 02:23 PM

Thanks for the great read Wood Stock, I thoughrily enjoyed it... as a title I would suggest maybe "Restless at the thought of love" but that's just a suggestion... anyway great work

Zu

Spice
Senior Member

since 2001-04-13

Posts 1266
Resting in my cardboard box.

5 posted 2001-07-07 10:14 PM

"Life can be so short,
And love so hard to find"
So true, Noel.
I loved this. Wonderful write. Wish I could help you with a title- but I can't even help myself in that area...haha. Keep 'em coming.

CwboyAtHeart
Senior Member

since 2001-04-14

Posts 541
Selah, WA, USA

6 posted 2001-07-08 02:58 AM

This one was really good. Enjoyed the read, but dunno what to say about a title... sorry i couldn't help ya out.

- Cody -

If Pigs Can Fly, So Can I!!!

If someboy laughs at me, does that make me funny or just plain stupid?

LoneWolf
Member

since 2001-03-10

Posts 384
IL

7 posted 2001-07-08 02:19 PM

This was awesome. i loved it. i could totally relate. good job.

It's too bad I'm not as wonderful a person as people say I am, because the world could use a few people like that.
I've learned that even when you th

Dopey Dope

Moderator

Member Patricius

since 2000-08-30

Posts 11132
San Juan, Puerto Rico

8 posted 2001-07-09 03:13 AM

I really liked this one. I liked the verses that Spice and Albert brought up. VERY true and well written. I enjoyed this poem.

I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust.

I'm in love with my shadow
I admire it daily

Acies

Moderator

Member Rara Avis

since 2000-06-07

Posts 7665
Twilight Zone

9 posted 2001-07-14 12:40 PM

Impressive poem
not much of my style but still a good read
keep it up

hi Sweets, Lizzy, Kris, Ina, Erin, Erica, Minna, Kit, Kamie, Javi, Jenn, Sharon, Nan, Cawlee, Cherish, Ashley, Sara, Justine, Leah, Jess, Kimmie, Mare

anonymousfemale
Member Elite

since 2000-02-02

Posts 2797
Limbo

10 posted 2001-07-15 03:16 AM

I really liked the way you ended the piece wiht a question at the end. This way it leaves space for tons of thoughts. The answer would be nice to find though.

Keep 'em coming, Noel.

~AF~

Psychopathic chickens are plotting against me...

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