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vixengrl04
Member

since 2001-04-26

Posts 495
East Haddam, CT

0 posted 2001-12-21 11:48 AM

This is very metaphorical, and quite different from what I usually write. I hope that u guys can understand it....

"Drifting"

Floating in this vast ocean of
unaccepted diversity,
I am a fish,
being forced to die young because
I don't know how to swim,
and my predators are waiting
at every moment
to creep in
and swallow me whole.

The icy waters are
closing in on me,
and my heart
is being shaped into a
frozen pit of emptiness,
weighing down the rest of my
delicate body.

So now I'm left here
all alone,
clinging to a life raft that is
constantly being pulled out
from underneath me,
Wishing that I knew how to
swim away,
but instead
I continue...
Drifting.

     *~Fighting for your love~*
    *~Is something I cannot do~*
   *~I'm not good enough to win~*
*~And I'm not strong enough to lose~*

xShUgArHiGhx

Member Elite

since 2000-09-26

Posts 3150
tRyIn tO fIt iN2 mY oWn ShoEs

1 posted 2001-12-21 01:31 PM

Absolutely amazing job here!! It had so much meaning to it...great poem!

ShE'S nOt ThE kInDa GiRL..WhO lIkeS tO tElL tHe WorLd AbOuT tHe Way She FEEL'S aBouT hErSelf...ShE tAkEs a LiTtLe TiMe In MakIn uP hEr MiNd..

Acies

Moderator

Member Rara Avis

since 2000-06-07

Posts 7665
Twilight Zone

2 posted 2001-12-21 01:47 PM

Too much pain, I've read so much pain today
I hope you do find comfort in life
Believe it or not, there are others willing to stay underwater lifting you up to catch your breath
thanks for sharing

là où est mon amour?
donde está mi amour?
wo ist meine Liebe?
Nelly Furtado é a menina a mais bonita no mundo largo do todo.

Marshalzu

Member Elite

since 2001-02-15

Posts 2681
Lurking

3 posted 2001-12-23 06:59 PM

This one was drifting to the bottom so I thought I would rescue it... *hears groans*

This is a very well written piece of poetry, if not a little sad, thank you for sharing it with us and keep on posting

"No army can conquer a galaxy, yet faith alone can overturn the universe"

Jenabou
Member

since 2000-06-13

Posts 215
Oklahoma/Nova Scotia Canada/USA

4 posted 2001-12-23 07:15 PM

Wow, this was great
I think we all feel as if we're "drifting" sometimes
wonderful post

The world is like a mirror; frown at it, and it frowns at you. Smile and it smiles, too
Be kind,for everyone you meet is fighting a harder battle

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