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Teen Poetry #5
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Forbidden Feelings
| Teen Poetry #5 |
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Forbidden Feelings |
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HopelessRomanticGuy Member
since 2001-08-17
Posts 495LI, New York 
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Blond hair, blue eyes, Behind which a soul does hide, She stands tall surrounded by power, When she is sad, she sleeps away the hours. She’s at my door nearly every day, I wish I understood this game we play. She seeks me out, keeps me near, Though she is bored, she keeps me here. She and I both have our loves, Her’s here and mine above. We both have problems in that area, Wondering why for them we care. We wander aimlessly, in circles we go, Enjoying our company and saying all we know. Hours we spend, together again, Noon to night, we’re together and then, Reality strikes, time awakens, And apart we must be, but I’m not shaken. As we walk, her that way and I this, I resist the urge to take a kiss. I know, it’s wrong and lecherous, But I have no control in this… My heard does not know where it lies, As one love begins, another may die. Alas it could not be anyway, For I alone seem to feel this way. Her heart is still firmly planted, On the one to which it was handed. Don't Drink and Park! |
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| © Copyright 2001 Richard H. Dikeman - All Rights Reserved | |||
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lone_poet707 Member
since 2001-11-17
Posts 70black hole named Aylmer |
this is a beautiful piece! I could totally relate to this one- I actually just went thru a situation you described in this excellent poem. Hope to read more from ya! -Joe |
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Acies
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-07
Posts 7665Twilight Zone |
Just respect others and their relationships and you'll be ok thanks for sharing là où est mon amour? |
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AngelPoet87 Member
since 2001-04-21
Posts 280Indy |
Oh I really like this. Such a bittersweet piece. I can relate to this, been there once before. But made it out okay! Time will tell, whats meant to be will be, and all that good gravy. I also really like the ending, the only suggestion I would have is to change the line... "When she is sad, she sleeps away the hours." to "When she is sad, she sleeps for hours" or something, I just think a line with one or two less syllable(s) would flow much easier. All in all, a pretty good write! Liefhe alle ten spijte van duivel... A tes souhaits... A tes amours... Qu ils restent. J'ai t'adore. Je t'aime. |
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HopelessRomanticGuy Member
since 2001-08-17
Posts 495LI, New York |
Thanks for the advice on the line! I coudn't seem to come up with anything, and I gave up when I got frustrated. Glad you'all liked the poem! Don't Drink and Park! |
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vixengrl04 Member
since 2001-04-26
Posts 495East Haddam, CT |
Her heart is still firmly planted, On the one to which it was handed. Ouch!! This poem was so sad, and it doesn't sound like a very fun situation. Good luck in resolving it.   ~*Nikki*~ *~Fighting for your love~* |
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anonymousfemale Member Elite
since 2000-02-02
Posts 2797Limbo |
Interesting piece. We can't help who we love but we can control what we do. If it's meant to be, it will be. Please remember to reply to others work too. ~AF~ If this is all the world has to offer, I want a refund on my life. |
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punkrockerrobin
since 2001-05-15
Posts 1180Sparks, NV |
aww hun it's gonna be ok. don't let your mind overhrow your heart and you will figure things out. robin repeat after me and rhonda : TITUS RULES THE EARTH!! ( i saw your sig rhon! lol) |
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xShUgArHiGhx
since 2000-09-26
Posts 3150tRyIn tO fIt iN2 mY oWn ShoEs |
Such a tough situation to be in...i've been in it before and i wish all the strength in the world for you cuz i remember it took a lot outta me...::hugs:: hope things turn out the way you would like them too ShE'S nOt ThE kInDa GiRL..WhO lIkeS tO tElL tHe WorLd AbOuT tHe Way She FEEL'S aBouT hErSelf...ShE tAkEs a LiTtLe TiMe In MakIn uP hEr MiNd.. |
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