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krystlebabe19
Junior Member

since 2001-11-09

Posts 27

0 posted 2001-11-30 01:22 PM

"Invisible"

Im not perfect
and I dont claim to be

Im insecure as hell, but
hey thats just me

I know theirs tons of girls
always by your side

I stand away from the crowd
without any pride

I wanna talk to you, just to get
you to give me a second glance

Everytime im about to,
another girl takes my chance

I wish you could see me
understand that im really their

Not an figment of your imagiantion
or a breeze in the air

I know some day you will see im really their

But by the time you notice me ,
I wont be here

~Krystle
*
My ending really needs some work,I just worte it yesterday for my friend shawn

Jezziekaka
Member

since 2001-08-21

Posts 58
where the trees touch the sky

1 posted 2001-11-30 05:21 PM

I love this poem!! "Im not perfect
and I dont claim to be" I am that way never perfect and I don't claim to be sometimes!

Great poem!
Jezzika

be dangerous, unpredictable, and make a lot of noise!

Fading Away

Member Elite

since 2001-03-14

Posts 3131
Lynchburg, Virginia

2 posted 2001-12-01 01:18 PM

I love the opening to this poem. I think that really set the tone. So many people think opposite of this. The rhyme scheme was also pretty well done. I enjoyed this

Nice work

--Marie

If there's one thing I've learned, it's that the most frustrated people in the world are those who know they're stupid, but keep trying anyway.

TopGunLauren
Senior Member

since 2000-08-02

Posts 718
California

3 posted 2001-12-01 11:01 PM

I really liked this poem.
Lauren

xShUgArHiGhx

Member Elite

since 2000-09-26

Posts 3150
tRyIn tO fIt iN2 mY oWn ShoEs

4 posted 2001-12-03 01:35 PM

I liked this poem a lot...i also understand where your coming from. It reminds me of a quote that goes something like "One day you will love me as i loved you, one day you will need me as i've needed you, one day you will care for me as i've cared for you but one day you'll want me and i wont want you"...i hope that day doesnt come..i hope you get to be with whom you admire..u deserve it

ShE'S nOt ThE kInDa GiRL..WhO lIkeS tO tElL tHe WorLd AbOuT tHe Way She FEEL'S aBouT hErSelf...ShE tAkEs a LiTtLe TiMe In MakIn uP hEr MiNd..

Acies

Moderator

Member Rara Avis

since 2000-06-07

Posts 7665
Twilight Zone

5 posted 2001-12-07 11:28 PM

girl, just go up to this person and talk
hesitation will not get you anywhere
a little confidence is all it takes
good luck and I hope things go well

là où est mon amour?
donde está mi amour?
wo ist meine Liebe?

lone_poet707
Member

since 2001-11-17

Posts 70
black hole named Aylmer

6 posted 2001-12-16 09:08 PM

Wow, i luved this piece! I could totally relate to this poem. Keep writin!
-Joe

Jenn Cirrincione

Member Elite

since 2000-07-02

Posts 2107
Fl

7 posted 2001-12-17 12:11 PM

I know this feeling. You should just try and get closer to him. Call him...come on you can do it

Jenn

"I want love on my own terms; after everything I've ever learned. Me, I carry too much baggage..."

Lil_Angel123
Junior Member

since 2001-12-16

Posts 13

8 posted 2001-12-17 06:05 PM

Hey there! i know Shawn! And i used too. but he is just trying to be a playa. but he cant be because he makes everyone like him! but then he goes on and flirts with the next girl next to him. hell keep being like that. He wont change and there is nothing anyone can do about it. not even his girlfriend. If that is the same shawn that you are talking about.

Streen
Member

since 2001-11-28

Posts 169

9 posted 2001-12-17 06:09 PM

Some men need to learn some decent manners and lessons of chivalry and the like. It isn't right to treat women as objects with no feelings.

*steps off of pedestal*

-Derek

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