Teen Poetry #5 |
Road of Love's Loss |
Android 17
since 2001-07-21
Posts 664Winnipeg |
Hey, Pips! I haven't posted any poetry here in ahwile...so, here's my big comback debut! Road of Love's Loss- Down the road of Love's Loss... Each house is filled with painful memories. "I love you" and "We'll always be together---" Her heartfelt promises broken on a whim. Paved with happiness and laughter, The now tear soaked road remains broken---and crashed. Each house entered bring now hurt... New reminders of old emotions. As night transcends...her vioce crys, "I hate you!", "Get away from me" "What did I ever do?", I call back. "All I ever did was fall in love..." ------------- Yeah, you can tell I wrote that recently... ~ Alex "To be forgotten is much worse than death!" |
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© Copyright 2001 Alex-lee Hryhorczuk - All Rights Reserved | |||
anonymous albert ?
since 2001-03-23
Posts 2979 |
Alex, dude welcome back!...think this had imagery well protrayed...and you did a well job on the expression of emotions. "I love you" and "We'll always be together---" Her heartfelt promises broken on a whim." those verses feels TRULY like a memory when read. nice. =) |
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sleepymoongirl Member
since 2001-04-19
Posts 157bc canada |
Um I thought it was cool it sounds like you fell in love with someone who is afraid of others loving her as i start to analize someone i don't know.... as i said tho i thought it was pretty cool |
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SunShine913
since 2001-08-19
Posts 211Italy but from NC |
OMG welcome back and i LOVE this sooooooooo much .. your lucky im a friend and im nice or i would steal it hehe... well anyways keep writing so i can keep reading~! *!~!* Andrea *!~!* |
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cherish Senior Member
since 2001-03-25
Posts 1639swimming in fairy floss........... |
OOOOOOOOH..yay! youre posting again.. ...i was wondering when you where going to share all those amazing pieces you write for your sig...glad youre back up to it.. good piece kiddo- A liked it so much she wants to steal it liked it bunches alex...thanks for sharing.. |
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Android 17
since 2001-07-21
Posts 664Winnipeg |
Wow! Andrea, Cherish, 'Bert and Moongirl. Wow! I didn't think I was missed that much! *sigh* Wow, to mean something to somebody really feels good! Thanks! ^_^ I'll be sure to post here more often! "To be forgotten is much worse than death!" |
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keoni Senior Member
since 2000-10-16
Posts 850Up in the mountains in the NFC |
I can relate so much.Good to see you back. Great post. I can totally relate to this one, especially the last few lines.Hope you stick around. Jon "Only God can judge me" Tupac Shakur |
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vixengrl04 Member
since 2001-04-26
Posts 495East Haddam, CT |
"All I ever did was fall in love..." How come falling in love always ends with so much pain? I guess that's why it's called "falling", huh? This was really heartfelt, and I really liked the way you put dialogue into it. The last line was smashing, I loved it! Hope you get over the pain you've expressed. ~*Nikki*~ ~*I'd rather you hate me for what I am than love me for what I'm not.*~ |
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Android 17
since 2001-07-21
Posts 664Winnipeg |
Aaaaawww....thanks guys! ^_^* "To be forgotten is much worse than death!" |
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Acies
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-07
Posts 7665Twilight Zone |
I guess vixen has already expressed my thoughts hope things go your way soon thanks for sharing là où est mon amour? |
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Salooma Senior Member
since 2000-01-28
Posts 781 |
great writing! very different, very good!!! loved it Salma |
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Alyssa
since 2001-05-30
Posts 385IM ENGAGED!!!!! |
whoa... I LuV 2 fReAk out saLEpeEpZ. ThEy AsK me If tHey CaN heLp Me, & I sAy,'HaVe U gOT NEthINg Id like?'TheN thEy aSk mE wuT sIZe I sAy "X-tr MedIuM" |
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AngelPoet87 Member
since 2001-04-21
Posts 280Indy |
Wow this one hit home...good write, and good to see your poetry again. Liefhe alle ten spijte van duivel... A tes souhaits... A tes amours... Qu ils restent. J'ai t'adore. Je t'aime. |
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Android 17
since 2001-07-21
Posts 664Winnipeg |
LMAO, I guess you can say that my favourite responce was "Whoa..." Thanks y'all! "Fighting was the only thing I was good at...but I at least I always fought for what I beleived in..." |
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Spice Senior Member
since 2001-04-13
Posts 1266Resting in my cardboard box. |
OOOOooo Loved the whole road and eahc house being sort of a different emotion....Totally awesome idea there. Thumbs up to you, deary. "I'd rather die purposely alone than to have lived an accidental life of solitude."- Jesa "§ùgã®" Thompson |
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xShUgArHiGhx
since 2000-09-26
Posts 3150tRyIn tO fIt iN2 mY oWn ShoEs |
Yay!!!!! Your writing in here again Ohhhh Lovely hehehehehe...i liked this poem a lot...short and sweet but it seems like you really got everything you were feeling across in the poem. Sounds like a tough day/night...but im really happy your postin again!! SO DONT STOP! ShE'S nOt ThE kInDa GiRL..WhO lIkeS tO tElL tHe WorLd AbOuT tHe Way She FEEL'S aBouT hErSelf...ShE tAkEs a LiTtLe TiMe In MakIn uP hEr MiNd.. |
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ShortSexyAngelOnEarth Junior Member
since 2001-12-24
Posts 36im a louisiana cajun princess! lol |
hey y'all, i used to post on here a lot, i was shortsexyangel, then when i came back i couldnt remember my password, and my email has changed since then, so.... lol, i have a new name, and im gonna try to rply to a lot poems before i put any of my stuff up. Android: your poem really hit home for me, just not in a good way. see, i related to the girl you were i guess talking to in the poem, because i have a problem committing even when i want to. i guess i get scared. anyways, thanks, its made me think about a lot of stuff. |
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Android 17
since 2001-07-21
Posts 664Winnipeg |
That's the point of my work actually...to express myself and/or to get people to think! (OW! It's hurting! Lol) Wow, this is the most feedback I've gotten outta a poem! Thanks y'all! ~ Alex Surrender now, or prepare to fight! |
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Fading Away
since 2001-03-14
Posts 3131Lynchburg, Virginia |
Welcome back! I like this poem... it hit me very hard. Love lost sucks, indeed. But everything heals with time. It just takes some hearts longer than others. *hugs* Good luck. Enjoyed, as always, Alex. Hope to see more soon! --Marie If there's one thing I've learned, it's that the most frustrated people in the world are those who know they're stupid, but keep trying anyway. |
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prov1717 Member
since 2001-12-26
Posts 74NE |
hey i enjoyed this very much and i look forward to reading more! |
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Android 17
since 2001-07-21
Posts 664Winnipeg |
Thank you both sooo much! Surrender now, or prepare to fight! |
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anonymousfemale Member Elite
since 2000-02-02
Posts 2797Limbo |
Geeze....that last line is so powerful! It seriously knocks you out of your chair. Wow...amazing work, Alex. One to definitely be proud of. There is a lot of passion in this and it brings everything inside of you to a head. Wow once again... Thanks so much for sharing this. Enjoyed the read! ~AF~ If this is all the world has to offer, I want a refund on my life. |
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Android 17
since 2001-07-21
Posts 664Winnipeg |
Wow...I never knew this poem was THIS great! Lol, I feel so loved... Surrender now, or prepare to fight! |
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punkrockerrobin
since 2001-05-15
Posts 1180Sparks, NV |
i liked this poem a lot! great work! robin repeat after me: punk is the best music ever created! |
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Domzi Member
since 2001-09-08
Posts 288New York (BK) |
This is a great write! Poetry is spiritual ventilation! |
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Android 17
since 2001-07-21
Posts 664Winnipeg |
I blink---and come back to see NEW replies! Thanks y'all! Surrender now, or prepare to fight! |
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Vegeta New Member
since 2002-01-04
Posts 2Um---Canada? |
Hmmm...this is about sarah, eh? sorry man... Go out and do something---for that's all that life is...a series of moments... |
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Android 17
since 2001-07-21
Posts 664Winnipeg |
Thanks Joe...Thanks! The trick is to know when to walk away---and TO KNOW WHEN TO RUN!!! |
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LCsftball16 Junior Member
since 2001-05-17
Posts 39 |
okay... well i'm the last to post, but whatever lol. i found this piece ultimately breath-taking... I LOVE IT! |
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PoetryIsLife
since 2001-10-27
Posts 1763...in my boxers... |
Hey, dude, I loved it. You know I got nothin but love for ya! This one line is the only thing that seemed a bit off to me: Each house entered bring now hurt... I'm not sure why, it just stumbled me a bit. Check your email man. Talk soon mate. Sincerely, Titus I am me, living in my dreams. |
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Erin Member Elite
since 2000-06-15
Posts 2527~Chicago~ |
This is a really great poem... "All I ever did was fall in love..." This is in my opinion the best part of the poem...It sums the whole thing up.. Thanks for sharing it!!! I hope to see alot more of your work!!! If you want something very badly, set it free. If it comes back to you, its yours forever, if it doesnt, it was never yours to begin with" |
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Android 17
since 2001-07-21
Posts 664Winnipeg |
Thanks! I can't beleive how many people are replying to this! The trick is to know when to walk away---and TO KNOW WHEN TO RUN!!! |
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