Teen Poetry #5 |
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NYC and DC in are hearts |
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krystlebabe19 Junior Member
since 2001-11-09
Posts 27 |
Please tell me what you guys think of this , I think it could use some fixing up thanxs. I wasnt involed in either of these horrible events I just put myself in someones place The terrifing Screams The cloudy smoke The flaming fires that are still glowing in the dark The smell of flesh People putting thier limits to the test Jumping out windows holding thier loved ones Praying to god for some sort of sign to help them The sirens loud as can be Feels like a dream ,if only I was sleepy Im wide awake, mostly in shock My arms tremble My knees shake I open my eyes to find myself alone lying in the dark Under burent rubble On top of dead bodies I try to yell, but im so scared my voice doesnt even make a sound "God I hope they find me , Please dont let me die like this |
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© Copyright 2001 krystlebabe19 - All Rights Reserved | |||
allie Member
since 2001-07-09
Posts 218Australia |
the imagery in this was really excellent the last lines summed this poem up fabulously... i loved this a brilliant tribute which the people invloved would be honnoured to have written for them, thankyou ALLIE |
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Acies![]()
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-07
Posts 7665Twilight Zone |
you did a good job puting yourself in that situation. let's just hope and pray that september 11 doesn't happen again thanks for sharing là où est mon amour? |
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Dopey Dope![]()
Moderator
Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132San Juan, Puerto Rico |
This was pretty out there. I mean it's not a poem that you can say you enjoyed, but you did really give me and others a perspective of the happening that is very real. Hope to see more of your work. ![]() I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust. |
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