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Teen Poetry #5
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Truth hurts
| Teen Poetry #5 |
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Truth hurts |
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Alyssa
since 2001-05-30
Posts 385IM ENGAGED!!!!! |
busted glass and dreams empty promises words without feelings the end of you and me an end to something that was never there fantasies more than i can bear a blade so sharp stinging me all the blood of reality a tear that falls a tear for you a tear that means more than you want it to so much of a mess to clean up no one there my bad luck here it all goes just like that a snap of the finger a drop of the hat say goodbye it has died with the words that you said the tears that i cried BTW this is not a poem about me, its just a poem. but i have been in this situation..so i guess it is about me isnt it? well i just wrote it cuz it came to mind thanks fer readin "If I made you mad today, would you still love me tomorrow?"-Incubus [This message has been edited by Alyssa (edited 10-25-2001).] |
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| © Copyright 2001 Amèe - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Knight of Secrecy Member
since 2001-10-12
Posts 113San Juan, Puerto Rico |
"just like that a snap of the finger a drop of the hat" Short meaningful lines Very nice poem. -C.M. |
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Missthang Member
since 2001-07-03
Posts 103 |
alyssa~ i like it. the style is different than what i'm used to reading but i liked it. and that's the truth ;-) -ab *The heart is a house for love* |
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~gretchenp34~ Junior Member
since 2001-10-08
Posts 46Ohio, USA |
very very good........explains the situation with me and that old friend ive told ya all about. |
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Skyfire
since 2000-12-27
Posts 3381Riding |
Right on! I think this one's really good! A little more light than a lot of the ones that have been circulating lately! Thanks for a change! It takes more work to love myself than to love others... I guess that explains it, eh? |
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aaron woodside Member
since 2001-09-26
Posts 256 |
I liked it alot. It seems to describe where I seem to always be. Great write though. I'll write you later. ex animo, Aaron There are no great men, only men in great circumstances. |
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xShUgArHiGhx
since 2000-09-26
Posts 3150tRyIn tO fIt iN2 mY oWn ShoEs |
"an end to something that was never there" I think that part up there is a very hard thing to realize...that something you thought u had never really was yours to begin with...the truth stings but its better to know and realize the truth then fool yourself...its very difficult to do and i give you a ton of credit for being strong enough to figure that out....::hugs:: great poem...very good ShE'S nOt ThE kInDa GiRL..WhO lIkeS tO tElL tHe WorLd AbOuT tHe Way She FEEL'S aBouT hErSelf...ShE tAkEs a LiTtLe TiMe In MakIn uP hEr MiNd.. |
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anonymousfemale Member Elite
since 2000-02-02
Posts 2797Limbo |
Good piece, Alyssa. You might want to work on the meter a bit though. It gets a bit choppy in certain places and reads through a bit wonkily. Other than that, I like what you're saying. Good work and remember to reply too.  ~AF~ Maybe I'm just a girl...interrupted. |
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Shygirl82 Member
since 2001-02-19
Posts 245Ilinois |
Wow...I am so completely feeling this one. This was like a hand smack in the face. This was great...wonderfully written and as the name states...held a lot of truth. ~Nikki~ Smile!! You never know who may be falling in love with it... |
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Alyssa
since 2001-05-30
Posts 385IM ENGAGED!!!!! |
Thanks guys, i havent been on latelt because me and my boyfriend are havin some slight problems and stuff. Thanks for the replies. More poems are coming soon, just need to work on a couple lines... "If I made you mad today, would you still love me tomorrow?"-Incubus |
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Alyssa
since 2001-05-30
Posts 385IM ENGAGED!!!!! |
BUMP! 3 out of 5 computers bought today will be physically abused by their owners... |
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allie Member
since 2001-07-09
Posts 218Australia |
enjoyed your post, as always... Glad to be back and seeing great writing again! Fabulous work. ALLIE |
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Honey Member
since 2001-10-09
Posts 92Hot girl From Canada |
"here it all goes just like that With a snap of the finger a drop of the hat." Wow It's amazing how you could lose so much just like that isn't it? Keep smiling It Feels As If I've Always Been Someone On The Outside Looking In. |
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DancinQueen
since 2000-07-29
Posts 1092Kokomo,IN,USA |
ugh this makes me mad. not ure poem, the situation. i HATE it..and ive grown fond of it. sucks huh. maes you want to give up forever. oh well...great poem tho *dq **You can't always trust the people you want to** |
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DawnG
since 2000-06-23
Posts 1494United States |
Alyssa, It really hurts when you find out the truth, that someone doesn't love you. Believe me, I know, I've been there. But just as I've been there, I know that you will bounce out of this and find someone who does love you. Dawn |
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keoni Senior Member
since 2000-10-16
Posts 850Up in the mountains in the NFC |
Alyssa, good poem. I know this feeling too! I liked the end of this poem. Summed it all up perfectly. Jon "Only God can judge me" Tupac Shakur |
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Jenn Cirrincione
since 2000-07-02
Posts 2107Fl |
BLAH to this situation. It totally sucks. But I love the way you have expressed it. Nice job. Jenn "I want love on my own terms; after everything I've ever learned. Me, I carry too much baggage..." |
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Alyssa
since 2001-05-30
Posts 385IM ENGAGED!!!!! |
Dawn, I did find someone I love...and he loves me too, were engaged. its wonderful -Aly 3 out of 5 computers bought today will be physically abused by their owners... |
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Acies
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-07
Posts 7665Twilight Zone |
good to see that the poem is not a current situation thanks for sharing là où est mon amour? |
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