Teen Poetry #5 |
![]() ![]() |
Awaiting my liberty |
![]() ![]() ![]() |
K. Rebel Junior Member
since 2001-10-21
Posts 40San Juan, PR |
I see the sun of dusk, Look at it and it blinds me, It enters my soul like a bullet And awakens me. Opens my eyes firmly And enters into my heart, It runs threw my veins With a beautiful heat, A volatile heat, A heat of pleasure, A heat I do not know. I enter a glorious world, I see what I want And I want what I see. I loose my mind In this beautiful world of pleasure. I forget that thundering bullet That divides my soul, I forget that incredible love, That blinds me to frequent. I forget that abyss, In which I fall all the time. I forget that battle I lose day by day, Trying to move my boneless body. I think in nothing that will lose me, I think in me, And I lose my conscience. I turn around, I see a woman, Precious and indescribable, That revolves my mind, That changes my thoughts, That makes me think In the dawn of a new day, That soon will be here, And will brighten my being. I feel entertained for a moment, And I return to my boring duties. And I will soon see, I only dream, With a liberty I will soon arrive. |
||
© Copyright 2001 Danny Brown - All Rights Reserved | |||
cherish Senior Member
since 2001-03-25
Posts 1639swimming in fairy floss........... |
hey..i enjoyed the imagery you played with in this- i could picture myself staring at the sunset and forgetting everything about my life, and then turning around and seeing that woman...and then going to sleep. i think you did a wonderful job with that danny- awesome piece poet....
|
||
xShUgArHiGhx![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]()
since 2000-09-26
Posts 3150tRyIn tO fIt iN2 mY oWn ShoEs |
You have amazing imagery in this piece...very well written...u got a lotta talent hun...keep em coming! ShE'S nOt ThE kInDa GiRL..WhO lIkeS tO tElL tHe WorLd AbOuT tHe Way She FEEL'S aBouT hErSelf...ShE tAkEs a LiTtLe TiMe In MakIn uP hEr MiNd.. |
||
Knight of Secrecy Member
since 2001-10-12
Posts 113San Juan, Puerto Rico |
I agree, very nice imagery, good poem (el pato seras tu!) -C.M. |
||
![]() ![]() |
⇧ top of page ⇧ |
![]() ![]() ![]() |
All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format. |