Teen Poetry #5 |
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pain |
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fearing-laughter Senior Member
since 2001-04-24
Posts 605land of cheese (Wisconsin) |
heeeey PIP ppl, i have returned. lol half of u are pry new and have no idea who i am, and obviously i don't know you. so yeah, my name is bergundy. hi hi. this is some half-bummed attempt at a poem by me. it feels weird to write again because i haven't in so long, but i think i will pry start again. god the explaination is gonna be longer then the freakin poem...oh well. plz read, and be honest. thanks. -fear- watch my life slowly drain away down, down, the kitchen sink. it's almost like, all these memories, are not my own, they belong to someone else. someone who cared, someone who loved, someone who wanted to live, but most importantly... someone who could feel any emotion besides pain. -fear- i'm a penguin! i'm a penguin! i'm a cute lil penguiiiin! i'm a penguin i'm a penguin! i eat FISH!--tis the pretty penguin song |
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© Copyright 2001 bergundy - All Rights Reserved | |||
anonymous albert ?![]()
since 2001-03-23
Posts 2979 |
wOW...short but VERY powerful in its simplicity...the last part was hard hitting...also...wB!, Fear.. ![]() if i die before i wake...i pray the Lord my soul to take - when thugs cry- |
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punkrockerrobin![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]()
since 2001-05-15
Posts 1180Sparks, NV |
i really liked it.very well done! robin bye lizzy,javi,acire,cherish,SEA,vicky,laura,andrea,jessa and anyone else i forgot i will be back to torment you soon muhahahahahahaha |
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Alyssa![]() ![]() ![]() ![]()
since 2001-05-30
Posts 385IM ENGAGED!!!!! |
oh my good golly! i loved this i put it in my library!!! "I swear officer! It was PINK." |
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keoni Senior Member
since 2000-10-16
Posts 850Up in the mountains in the NFC |
I liked this one. If new people didn't know you, they will now. Good job on the poem and good to see you back. Jon "Your anger is a gift"-Rage Against The Machine |
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zarina Member
since 2001-05-19
Posts 180 |
Great to see that you're back! ![]() And the poem was good.. as usual, hehe. I'm always myslef. Isn't that enough for you? |
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xShUgArHiGhx![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]()
since 2000-09-26
Posts 3150tRyIn tO fIt iN2 mY oWn ShoEs |
Im so happy to see that your back here w/us sharing your poems ![]() |
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SunShine913![]()
since 2001-08-19
Posts 211Italy but from NC |
HeY i dont know you but that was a kick azz poem .. keep it up i loved it and i hope i get to read more of your work .. And WELCOME back !~Andrea~! |
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anonymousfemale Member Elite
since 2000-02-02
Posts 2797Limbo |
Welcome back again, fear. ![]() Simple yet deep piece. I felt a connection with a lot of it especially this part: "someone who cared, someone who loved, someone who wanted to live, but most importantly... someone who could feel any emotion besides pain." That I really went wow at. Thanks for sharing this and keep writing. ![]() ~AF~ "Hi there, can I relay a sonnet your way?" |
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Dopey Dope![]()
Moderator
Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132San Juan, Puerto Rico |
Very nicely written. I loved the ending to this one. A poem well done. ![]() I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust. |
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Acies![]()
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-07
Posts 7665Twilight Zone |
Welcome back, nice to see you again I did enjoy the read I believe though that you can add another stanza I feel the ending was a little short but still a great read thanks for sharing hi Sweets, Lizzy, Jesa, Ina, Allysa, Marie, Erica, Minna, Kit, Kamie, Javi, Jenn, Sharon, Nan, Cawlee, Cherish, Chelsea, Baker, Leah, Jess, Kimmie |
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aaron woodside Member
since 2001-09-26
Posts 256 |
Hey I'm new so I don't know ya but That was good. I like the kinna sad, depressing ones best. Great write. Ex Animo, Aaron |
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Poet on Acid Member
since 2001-01-07
Posts 325Florida, USA |
wow. Nice start to a restart of your writing. If that makes any sense. I'm sorry I couldn't reply to your post sooner but I haven't had the time to be on as you very well know. I love they way you write things. Sort of jagged and torn but still getting the message across quite clear. Anyways enough psycho babble. "Appreciate your ability to forget...you'll need it when it's time to forgive" |
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DawnG![]() ![]()
since 2000-06-23
Posts 1494United States |
This was a great read. Thanks for sharing. Dawn |
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