»
Archives
»
Open Poetry #14
»
Hurts of Love
| Open Poetry #14 |
|
Hurts of Love |
|
|
Logan Senior Member
since 2001-05-28
Posts 1641Arkansas |
Unbidden thoughts come to stay, hidden away in the light of day. Creeping out on the soft mist rain, numbing my mind, chilling with pain. Invading my heart with dark of night, crying within of my sorrowful plight Thoughts of love which I did not seek, but filled my mind with the desire to keep To abandon love was so hard to bear, bitter thoughts asked me not to care Tears streamed down my face, knowing I could never share your embrace Lifting my eyes to the leaden skies, I asked someone to hear my cries. With a glow of light and crash of sound, the skies opened up and rain came down. Washing the tears from my face, melting the ice my heart had cased. A gentle breeze followed the rain, erasing my soul from my pain. Softness whispered out to me, “Let it be, let it be” The tender words cause me to cease, causing the soul to seek its peace. |
||
| © Copyright 2001 Logan - All Rights Reserved | |||
Victoria
since 2000-08-12
Posts 5869 |
Nicely written logan..enjoyed..  ~Victoria~
|
||
|
JCGF Member
since 2001-01-19
Posts 72MA |
This is my calling. To let the one we love flee from our lives (by choice) is one of the most difficult challenges to endure but if it is for the right reasons then you my friend have proven to be a very strong person. If it helps at all, I would like you to know that I will think of you and say a prayer for you as I lie to sleep tonight. I guess what I'm trying to say is that you've grabbed me with this one because I know the feeling all too well! Thanks for the EXCELLENT read! (((((HUGS))))), Tammy |
||
|
Temptress
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-06-15
Posts 7136Mobile, AL |
*soft gasp* Logan...you read my mind it seems. This one is exceptional, my friend. I can wholeheartedly relate. |
||
Mysteria
since 2001-03-07
Posts 18328British Columbia, Canada |
Loved this one Logan ... I wonder how you feel about this suggestion (and don't stone me okay?)...the last stanza is fantastic but may I make a little suggestion to equate the pain felt and the comfort found in its release? A gentle breeze followed the rain, erasing my soul from my pain. cleansing my soul of eroding pain Softness whispered out to me, Whispers of softness cried out to me, "Let it be, Let it be" “Let it be, let go, let it be” The tender words cause me to cease, These tender words caused me to cease, causing the soul to seek its peace. Warming my soul and kindling peace. I loved it so please just take this as a suggestion for what "I" feel would make the ending really strong! (hugs) Sharon ~*~ Remember to tell someone today that you love them ~*~ [This message has been edited by Mysteria (edited 06-01-2001).] |
||
|
Death Member
since 2001-05-26
Posts 112Twilight |
Indeed no pain is greater no words can ease the hurt most fragile doth bend us to our kness yet Love defies time and more it never greets me nor is it truly lost instead marking life its gifts hone the self in mirrors unblinking gaze love is never lost humans simply do misplace to be found in moments least simple not expecting appears full blown wholly given I have a friend who once said-"Sooner or later, Death makes a believer out of just about everyone." |
||
|
Logan Senior Member
since 2001-05-28
Posts 1641Arkansas |
Victoria..thank you for your words..can only hope you enjoyed as much as I have enjoyed your words...gentle smile Tammy, your words are as a balm and to think you would say a prayer for me is most humbling..thank you gentle one..gentle smile Temptress..gentle smile, then I am glad and you make my day Ahh, Mysteria, suggestions not only noted but incorporated..thank you so much, a fledging poet I am, and open to all thoughts and those do make all the difference. The thoughts of the guardian of the fires goes to you with peace and serenity. I appreciate your kind words, Sharon, and the hug..gentle smile Death, interesting as I have faced you before, and hold no thoughts of what is to come, as I have been there before. I hope my poor words inspired the fine words you wrote..til then, my friend |
||
|
Paula Finn Member Ascendant
since 2000-06-17
Posts 5546missouri |
I can only say...this is beauty...sad...but peaceful |
||
|
ethome Member Patricius
since 2000-05-14
Posts 11858New Brunswick Canada |
Pleased to meet you Logan! I really like the yearning appeal of this verse... "Lifting my eyes to the leaden skies, I asked someone to hear my cries. With a glow of light and crash of sound, the skies opened up and rain came down. Washing the tears from my face, melting the ice my heart had cased." Great spirit to that verse!! The whole poem is great!! |
||
|
Logan Senior Member
since 2001-05-28
Posts 1641Arkansas |
Ahh, Paula, thank you, my northline neighbor. I am glad you have enjoyed...gentle smile Yes, ethome, it is nice meeting you also, and appreciate your kind words. |
||
|
snowpants Member Elite
since 2000-09-16
Posts 2061KS |
'Thoughts of love which I did not seek, but filled my mind with the desire to keep To abandon love was so hard to bear, bitter thoughts asked me not to care' Very heartfelt lines, Logan...excellent write throughout! I really like this one... sp  everytime I close my eyes, |
||
|
walker Member Elite
since 2001-02-11
Posts 2240Florida |
Beautifully written, well done! |
||
|
Logan Senior Member
since 2001-05-28
Posts 1641Arkansas |
Thank you, snowpants, I am glad you enjoyed and appreciate you reading...gentle smile My thanks for your read and your kind words, I am trying...gentle smile |
||
|
Logan Senior Member
since 2001-05-28
Posts 1641Arkansas |
Walker, my apologies, that last line was for you, and I ended up without the name..thanks again |
||
|
Watersign6 Senior Member
since 2001-05-25
Posts 823Hurricane,WV |
Logan this was amazing to me and also i think Mysteria made some amazing suggestions that would make it sound really more amazing |
||
|
Captivating1 Junior Member
since 2001-06-07
Posts 15Houston, TX |
I absolutely loved this poem...I also liked the fact that you ended it with finding peace within yourself rather than wallowing in self pity forever..I needed to read that... There is life after death....:-) |
||
|
catalinamoon
since 2000-06-03
Posts 9543The Shores of Alone |
Going back a few days, I found this beauty. Logan, I see that you know how hard it is to do this. You write of it with heart and soul. Peace Sandra |
||
|
Lone Wolf Member Ascendant
since 2000-03-16
Posts 5842Lansing, MI USA |
Very emotionally powerful write, Logan. You have expressed it so well. I enjoyed this very much. All writing comes |
||
|
Logan Senior Member
since 2001-05-28
Posts 1641Arkansas |
Watersign, thank you for the read, and yes, I think Mysteria made excellent suggestions, which I have incorportated into my original. I always enjoy these suggestions, for I am always trying to learn...gentle smile Captivating1, thank you for your kind words, so nice for you to reply and be here. Look forward to reading some more of your fine work...gentle smile Ahh,,Sandra, gentle smile, thank you for finding and reading. Very greatly appreciated that you did so, and for your kind words... LW, gentle smile, it is always nice seeing your replies and glad you enjoyed it... |
||
|
Paula Finn Member Ascendant
since 2000-06-17
Posts 5546missouri |
Sigh...reading this again...this line just holds me...“Let it be, let it be”...I wish it were so easy.... |
||
|
Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
This reached right in...thank you... |
||
|
Logan Senior Member
since 2001-05-28
Posts 1641Arkansas |
Ahh, Paula, thank you for reading it again. I liked what Mysteria added to the line though, "let it be, let go, let it be." No one ever said it was easy, but it can be done, trust me...gentle smile. Sissy, gentle smile, thank you for reading, and glad you enjoyed it.. |
||
Marge Tindal
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384Florida's Foreverly Shores |
Logan~ Having read this one many times ... I'm now composed enough to compose. Caressing winds of soft descent blow across the chasm of heartache spent Knowing full-well that in memory's dwell she just may come again Free to flow into your thoughts and leave again on a whim Letting go of letting go but reeling the memory in Remembering why - with tear-filled eye she mattered enough - to matter Thank you ! ~*Marge*~ ~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~ |
||
|
Logan Senior Member
since 2001-05-28
Posts 1641Arkansas |
My stars, Marge, you humble me so much, by writing such beautiful words on this, My thanks, peace and love for such tender thoughts from a friend...gentle smile |
||
|
Fancy Member
since 2001-06-05
Posts 189TN/USA |
Logan, Logan, Logan...the strength and magnificence of your words reach into my very soul....where also I find the need to "let it be"...how wonderfully you have captured my very feelings and emotions and made them your very own... |
||
|
Logan Senior Member
since 2001-05-28
Posts 1641Arkansas |
Ahh Fancy, thank you for such kind words. I hope then, that you were also about to let it go, and walk in peace...gentle smile |
||
|
|
⇧ top of page ⇧ |
|
| All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format. | ||
