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Open Poetry #14
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What is This???
| Open Poetry #14 |
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What is This??? |
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Fancy Member
since 2001-06-05
Posts 189TN/USA |
WHAT IS THIS!!! What is this we feel What is this we share Is there a name for it Is there something With which to compare? It's a song with no words A poem with no rhyme A lonely train On a one way track Trying to go back in time. Do you dare fill the song with love; The poem With a beautiful rhymn Do you dare chance A one way trip Into the very core Of the heart and soul To find what it is feeling When out of control? For surely, There are the words We seek. Surely, The answers we'll find To be able to fill Our song with love And our poem with beautiful rhyme. Then the train will no longer Be needed No return trip Would we care to make The key of fate Has opened the door We only need enter To find what's in store. Once there, Assured, we will see Hopefully, It's the only place We'll ever want to be!!! "...don't ever stop loving, don't ever stop believing, don't ever stop dreaming your dreams..." |
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| © Copyright 2001 Fancy - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Titia Geertman Member Ascendant
since 2001-05-07
Posts 5182Netherlands |
Once there, Assured, we will see Hopefully, It's the only place We'll ever want to be!!! This must refer to Passions, cause there's no other place I want to be, sharing feelings and all that other stuff we call friendship. Titia A rose is a rose is a rose...I guess... |
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Sven
since 1999-11-23
Posts 14937East Lansing, MI USA |
I like this one Fancy. . . and, I feel that for everyone, it's going to be different. . . wonderful. . . ----------------------------------------------------------- To the world, you may only be one person. But to one person, you may be the world. |
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Severn Member Rara Avis
since 1999-07-17
Posts 7704 |
Um..while this is a nice piece I'm just curious about this: 'It's a song with no words A poem with no rhyme A lonely train On a one way track Trying to go back in time.' Specifically the 'poem with no rhyme' part. If I read that in context with the rest of the lines it seems that you feel poetry without rhyme is something of an anomaly. Not really poetry at all.  About 3 out of my 300+ poems rhyme. My poetry is written in the style called 'free verse' - usually that doesn't involve rhyming... Poetry doesn't require rhyme to make it valid, oh and in a similar vein - a song doesn't require words to make it a song either...my constructive criticism would be to rethink the accuracy of your statements...  KI am a refugee of logic...insisting on unlikely land with every step. [This message has been edited by Severn (edited 07-06-2001).] |
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Fancy Member
since 2001-06-05
Posts 189TN/USA |
Especially for you, Severn.....my, my you take my thoughts in much too serious a nature as in your opinion that perhaps they need to be more accurate or correct.... as far as a poem with no rhyme, and/or a song with no words...if you take the time to reread, you will hopefully recognize these are thoughts and feelings being expressed here, and therefore, I strongly disagree with the idea that emotions must be accurate or correct...pls take them for just what they are.... "...don't ever stop loving, don't ever stop believing, don't ever stop dreaming your dreams..." |
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